Better Together (Patrick Kane)

44| Still My Hero

Danielle

I sit at a Hawks game in early April up in the boxes with my dad. He was being honored today before the game for his services and he's even doing shoot the puck later. He had a prosthetic leg that fit now but but was still getting used to it so I'm going to help him out with that. Being on the ice is hard enough with two legs, let alone one.

We sit there for a while and watch as the stadium starts to fill. The playoffs were coming up and the team was in as of right now. That was pretty exciting considering how much hockey had fallen in recent years here in Chicago.

I sit there and watch as my dad smiles out to the ice. He sure does have the family genes, that's for sure. I really didn't want to ruin his mood, but if I didn't say this now I would forever hate myself for not saying something.

"Hey dad, can I ask you a question" I start.

"Yeah, what's up" he asks.

"Do you want to be in my life" I ask his face drops.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean" he says slowly.

"I mean I know you want to be back in my life. You came back even though it was hard for you and that says enough. What I guess I'm asking is if you want to be a part of who I am, or do you just want to be here because you feel like you should or you have nothing else to do" I ask. I see tears form in his eyes and I can see that this has been killing him too.

"Im scared. I'm scared that if I get close I'll hurt you and I can't do that to you again. I know that you hated when I left, I would bring you things from overseas when I came back but that doesn't make up for the fact that I left you without a mother and any type of family. Feelings are intangible and while I went off to forget about mine it gave room for yours to surround you. I just wanted to get away from everything for a moment then I got caught up and couldn't get out. And I can't just walk back into your life, it's not that easy. It's not fair for you to go through what you did then for me to show up after all the hard parts are taken care of. I mean look at you, you got it all figured out and I feel like you're puzzle is put together and I'm the extra piece left out."

"It's nothing like that, I promise you. I want you back so bad, so fucking bad. I want my dad to be there for me. I want you to come to these games and us not act like there's nothing wrong when we know there is. But just because something is wrong doesn't mean it can't be right once again. And I wish I knew what I could say so you could understand just how much you being back in my life means to me. When I thought you died I was devastated. I didn't want to get married because you wouldn't be walking me down the isle. I didn't want to have kids because they wouldn't have their grandpa. And I didn't want to be me because I didn't have you. And it sucks because you're alive and you're here and you're going to stay but I still feel like we're still worlds apart. I hate it. I just want my dad back."

"I don't know if I can be that person for you. That's why I want to keep my distance. Because the moment you need me and I can't be what you need me to is when I have failed at the one job I never minded having, and that's being a father."

"You can't let me down dad. I promise you that as long as you're here and you want to be I will be happy. But I don't want you to force these things. Yeah, things are different, but you're still my hero" I smile.

"Really" he asks.

"Yeah. There's no one in this world who I think is stronger than you. Except for mom" I giggle.

"Yeah, she was pretty brave" he nods.

"So, you never answered my question" I trail off.

"Yes Danny, I would be honored to be a part of your life" he says and I smile. I pull him into a hug and he wraps his arms around me. "I love you baby girl" he sniffles.

"Love you too dad" I reply.

Before the game starts my dad crutches himself down to the ice and stands on it with another veteran as they sang the star spangled banner. I get chills as he looks up at me with the biggest smile on his face. I was so proud of him and I was happy the Hawks let him be honored by 22,000 for what he's done.

As the game starts he returns to my side and we enjoy two periods of exciting hockey. The weight had been lifted between us and he was being so talkative. He was cracking jokes and I swear I saw a sparkle in his eye. Everything felt so different, a good different. I think I finally have my dad back.

After the second period we go down to the ice and get ready for shoot the puck. He sets his crutches by the benches and I hold onto him tightly. I help them out there as he waves to the crowd.

"And joining us once again is Sergeant Major David Bowman along with his daughter Danielle Bowman" the announce and the crowd raises to their feet in applause. He turns to me with the widest smile on his face and it made me so happy.

"You ready" I ask and he nods. He shoots the first puck and I hold on tight. It goes wide and he chuckles.

"Close. Instead of rolling the puck off the stick try shooting it off" I suggest and he nods. She shoots the second puck and it goes right in. He raises his arms in triumph and wobbles a little but I stabilize him.

"We did it" he cheers.

"You still have one more" I laugh.

"Actually, I don't" he claims. Someone hands him his crutches and he hops away from me. They hand me a stick and I turn to him.

"Wait, what" I ask.

"I'm a bit tired, I don't know if I can do a second one. I want you to shoot this" he claims with a playful smirk. I look down the ice and see the small little puck sized hole in the net.

"Okay" I smirk and he moves a little more. They set the puck down and I stick handle a little to get used to it. This is weird without skates on. I was about to shoot until the person on the microphone stops me.

"Wait, we have a problem" he says and I look at him weird. "This young lady has a unfair advantage as she works with the players and she has lived with Stan Bowman for ten years and her grandpa is Scotty Bowman. Plus she dates a certain hockey player which gives her a advantage in this game. I say we make this a bit harder" he says and I laugh.

"Why do I feel like this is payback from Patrick from the winter classic" I mumble to myself. They hand me skates and I have to put them on. They pull the board and put a real goalie in there. I let out a groan as the crowd cheers.

"Alright, now you can go" the guy says and I just shake my head. I go down and try to see who was playing goalie. I look in the mask and see it was Patrick... too easy. I stick handle some before doing a toe drag and lifting the puck over his glove. I laugh as he just watches me skate pass confused as hell. Issuing his own moves against him was a little harsh but I enjoyed it.

"How do you know how to do that" he asks.

"It would be more shocking if I didn't know how to do that" I giggle. He lifts his mask enough that I could kiss him but not enough so people knew who it was. We skate our separate ways and I head to my dad who was smiling big. He must have known who that was.

"Maybe we should have gotten a better goalie" the announcer says.

"Yeah, I think his save percentage is a bit down there" I chuckle.

"You want to tell the stadium who our mystery goalie was" he asks.

"I'm not sure his pride would let me do that" I admit.

"Come on, you know you want to say it" he says. Before I can answer I see Patrick shoot out of the bench and head towards me. I take off and skate away so he couldn't catch me. I laugh as I get stuck behind the net and he stands in front of me.

"What did you say about my save percentage" he teases.

"It sucks" I laugh and he narrows his eyes. He pushes the net to the side and easily catches me. He starts kissing me all over my face and I try to wipe off all the saliva.

"Gross" I whine and he sets me back down.

"I'm sorry, how will I ever make it up to you" he asks.

"Get me a goal" I smile.

"I can do that" he says. He runs off and I just shake my head. What a weirdo.