Lauren is a shy girl that has just moved to Atlanta for college. Being bullied throughout high school has left her depressed, self conscious and feeling worthless. Hopefully she can find herself before its too late.
Cover made by the amazing @phuckw...
"Why? Where's that tall boy? His name is Jason right?"
"Jayceon." I laughed
"Jason, Jayceon. Same shit." She shrugged
"I just talked to him. He's on his way up now." I paused, hearing knocking on the door. "And that's him."
I slipped my feet into my slides and walked to the front door. I opened it and he stood there with roses and balloons.
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"Happy birthday baby." He walked inside.
"What's all this?"
"For you." He handed me the roses and a small bag. "I'll be right back. Don't open it yet." He took the balloons to my bedroom and came back.
"Hey sweetie." My mom hugged Jay before going into the kitchen
"Hey." He hugged her back. "Ok. Open it." He smiled
I took the tissue paper out of the bag and there was a box. I looked up at him then grabbed the box. Inside, there was a pandora bracelet and three charms. An artist's palette, a diamond heart and the letter L.
"This is beautiful. I love it." I wrapped my arms around him, hugging him tightly. "Thank you." I looked up at him
"You're welcome." He pecked my lips.
"You staying for a while? I'm making dinner and would love for you to join us." My mom came from the kitchen
"Yes ma'am." Jay nodded
My mothers eyes shifted over to me as I put my bracelet on my wrist. "Oooh, what's that?" She wiped her hands on a towel before walking over.
"My birthday gift." I smiled widely
"Let me see." She held up my wrist. "That's beautiful."
"Thank you."
Me and Jay sat in the living room and watched tv. He ran his fingers through my hair. It felt so good, I could go to sleep right then and there.
"Hey ya'll." Riley walked inside
I looked over and she had balloons and a bag in her hands. She walked over and sat the bag on the table.
"Happy birthday!"
I grabbed the bag and looked at what was inside. There were a few outfits, some jewelry and perfume, which smelled amazing.
"Thank you best friend."
"You're welcome."
"Are you staying for dinner?"
"You know I am." She laughed and walked into the kitchen
I placed everything back into the bag and sat it on the floor. I laid back on Jay and continued watching tv.
8:03 PM
"Dinner is ready!" My mom yelled
We all piled into the kitchen and grabbed a plate. My mother said grace and everybody began to eat. It was nice to see my mom and Jay getting along. Even though I've never had a guy around her, I feel like she wouldn't be this open if it was Chris sitting at the table. It didn't take long for me to feel sick. It's been happening off and on and I absolutely hate it.
"You ok?" Jay leaned over
I shook my head no before getting up and running to the bathroom.
I sighed as I flushed the toilet. Sitting on the bathroom floor, throwing up, is not how I imagined I would be spending my birthday. I made sure to brush my teeth before going to lay across my bed.
"Feel any better?" Jay sat on the bed
"A little."
"Good." He came over and kissed my forehead. "Its getting late so I'ma let you get some rest. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Nooo." I whined as he walked towards the door "Stay here tonight."
"I don't want to be disrespectful with your mom being here and all."
"Please." I pouted
He closed my bedroom door and took his shoes off before turning the lights off. I watched as he walked to the other side of the bed and laid down. He pulled me closed and wrapped his arm around me. His hand fell right at my stomach. Im pretty sure it wasn't intentional but I couldn't help but feel a way about it. A part of me wishes Chris would change the way he acts. Another part of me wishes I was actually carrying Jay's child. I mean He was more excited about my ultrasound than Chris was.
"Do you have class tomorrow?" He broke the silence
"Yes. I'm not going though."
"Another sick day?" He chuckled
"No...." I trailed off
"What is it?"
"I'm dropping out."
"Why?"
"I haven't been in a while anyway. I've already missed two finals. It's no need to go back. And besides, it would be hard as hell to get through another three years of college with a baby. That's why I'm thinking about temporarily moving to Virginia with my mom. I just need to get away right now, get myself together and with me being pregnant and all, I think that will be the best place to be."
He sat up. "So when were you going to tell me all of this? You dropping out of college and moving? So it's just fuck me huh? Didn't even consider how I would feel about it did you?"
"How you feel? How do you think I feel? I don't want to leave but I think it would be best right now. I'm not going to sit around here and feel like a burden to you. I constantly feel like you're only sticking around because you feel sorry for me."
"Then why are you leaving!" He raised his voice a little. "If you were bothering me I would tell you. You...you just..man, fuck it." He grabbed his shoes and walked out.
~~~~
I've sent Jayceon countless texts but he won't answer me. I didn't expect him to react they way he did. He didn't even give me a chance to explain myself. I just need to get away from Atlanta right now. My move to Virginia is not long term. I want him to know that but he won't answer.
"Come on Lauren. It's time to go." My mom walked to her car
I'm leaving today and I wanted to see him but I guess he doesn't want to see me. I stopped by his apartment after seeing Riley but still got nothing. I slowly walked to car in hopes that he would stop me before the car pulled off but he never did.
I stared out the window during the entire flight. Once we landed and headed to my moms house, I continued trying to contact Jay. I finally stopped trying once my calls started going straight to voicemail.
"You've been pretty quiet this whole time. Everything ok?" My mom glanced over at me as she drove.
I simply nodded.
I feel like I made the wrong choice coming here. Especially since I didn't discuss it with Jay before now. Maybe he just needs some space. I hope he understands.
