Bad Reputation (Shawn Mendes) complete

Chapter 53:

It's been about 9 months since Amelia's passing. Shawn and I haven't really been on good terms. I haven't seen him in 3 months. He's been on tour I thought it'd be a good idea to keep him distracted but he has been distance I spoke to him twice this week and it was a face time call to see the twins.

Don't get me wrong he's been doing amazing with his music he has more passion it makes him feel better instead of depressed at home . But sometimes it's a lot on me with the twins because they're getting older. It's twice the work load . I try calling Shawn
"Hello " I hear his voice

"hi baby-"

"hey I really can't talk right now "

"Okay-" he hung up I sigh frustrated wiping a tear. 

"Who was that?" Aaliyah asks walking into the garage

"No one" I sigh putting Liam in the car seat.

"It was Shawn wasn't it" she ask I don't answer and she sighs .

"Im going to talk to him about this"

"No!" I beg as she fastens Melanie in.

"Yes I am Sam you don't deserve this treatment you guys have a family together "

"He's just busy" I shrug

"Doing what lying around today's his day off he doesn't work Thursday he just posted a snap saying he's bored "

That one hurt my feelings. I just look at her and shrug .

"Maybe he doesn't want to be with me anymore maybe he's grown apart " I shrug again hopping in the drivers seat.

"This isn't fair to you sam you deserve better and if my brother won't give you the time of day find someone that will" she says sadly

I wipe a tear quickly "it just so hard and no one else is going to want me -"

"Yes they will you can't think like that " I sigh wiping my tears away starting up the car .

"Thank you Aaliyah but I'd rather be alone " I wind up my window and reverse .

- I go to the supermarket and I sigh getting out settings up the stroller . I put them in one by one and push it into the market I need diapers ASAP I only have a few left how you ask . Well I have twins and my dushbag fiancé didn't forfill his father duties.

I already hear paparazzi I keep my shades on and hoodie down I make sure that the stroller is secure and completely hiding their faces. I pick up a basket and pick up a few snacks for myself and a box of diapers and wipes. The box fell out the basket as it was obviously bigger than it but there's no other way I have to push the stroller. I sign I bend down to reach for it and some one shifts the stroller I gasp pulling back the shade down before punching the photographer in his face . security is here in an instant and Melanie is crying and then Liam follows. I sigh trying to comfort them .

"Mommy's here it's okay , it's okay" I say in a baby voice. I can't even take them out it's so much going on . But They finally calm down and I hurried up paying for my things . We head home .i tell Aaliyah everything that happened over the phone .

As I take out the keys I noticed the door opens .
I step back .

"Hey surprise " Shawn smiles at me Opening the door .I'm so angry with him I don't even know how to react. I push right past him.

"Come on sam" I change and put the twins back in their cribs before putting the groceries away .

"Sam" he calls my name several times and I ignore him slamming the cabinets. Then I feel him grab my wrist I try to move it but his grip is tight .

"Let go!" I fume

"No I want to talk to you" he pleads

"I don't" I feel my tears welling up

"Sam-"

"No Shawn you don't get to come in here and act like everything's okay . You haven't seen your children in months , nor have you even had a full conversation with me..... it's like we don't mean anything to each other anymore " I wipe my tears walking outside to the balcony so that we don't wake the twins.

He follows not saying a word

"So you're just not going to say anything ?" Tears falling from my eyes

He just looks at me not saying a word.

"this is stupid I'm just wasting my time" I get up and walk into the room.

He stops me pulling me back into his chest.

"I-I just been going through a lot-"

"Your not the only one Shawn-" I scream frustrated

"I needed some space alright " he looks down at me

"Why would you push us away Shawn ? When we need you the most?" I wipe my fallen tears "I struggle each and every day without you and the kids .I pray everyday that you walk through that door. I want to be there for you Shawn but you chose to do this alone " I sigh walking away from him.

I walk into the bathroom to wipe my smudged mascara off. I look in the mirror my messy bun and puffy eyes and Shawn creeping behind me .

He wraps his arms around my waists . I shove them away angrily. I walk out hearing Melanie crying. I sigh walking into our room to the crib. Praying she doesn't wake her brother . Thankfully she doesn't.
I rock her in my arms softly as Shawn leans on the door way heart broken.

"Let me make it up to you " he says walking over to me . But I'm over his bullshit.

"You can't just escape your problems by going to another state or leaving the country Shawn you have avoided every means of contact with me this whole time . You rush me off the phone don't answer text eventually stopped at answering my calls every time seems to be "a bad time" to talk and face timing to see your children for two minutes twice a week If most." I scowl at him taking a seat in the chair by the window.

"If you really want to make it up to me be a better father to children." I place Melanie in her crib rubbing her back

"As for me I'm over you" I bitterly say sliding my ring of my finger and throwing it at him.

I can tell by his face his heart just broke I try my best to stay strong and keep my composure.

"This isn't what I signed up for and this is not the life I want to live" I cry walking out .