The next morning, Jade picks me up again. We're sitting in her car, early for school. She tells me some funny story about cheerleading practice, which makes me laugh.
"I really like your laugh," Jade says. "It's adorable." I find it ironic because it's her laugh that I find adorable; it's bright and infectious.
I've never been good at giving compliments, and maybe I'm even worse at receiving them. I think of what to say without sounding either weird or rude.
"A normal person would say something like thanks now, or something nice," she says, a grin on her face.
"Guess I'm not normal then."
"No, I guess you're not."
I look at her, asking myself how I could have ever disliked this girl. In a way, she's a lot like Olive, and I suppose it's no surprise. After all they were friends. It hits me that the only reason Jade even befriended me was her.
"Do you like me, Jade?"
"No, of course I don't. I'm only hanging out with you 'cause you're super pretty." She lets out a laugh. "What kind of question is that? Obviously I do, idiot."
I could let it go, but there's a paranoid part of me thinking she just feels sorry for me.
"I mean... Are you only spending time with me because of Olive? Because you feel responsible, or guilty, or something."
It's a serious question. I can see that Jade knows it bothers me because her face changes. The look of amusement disappears.
"Honestly? At first I just wanted to make sure you're okay. You're her sister, so I was worried. But do you think I'd still be here if you would have turned out to be a bitch?"
"No... I guess not."
"Exactly." She smiles at me. "Roze, I like you. I really do."
It's the response I was hoping for. Even though I was mostly thinking we're actual friends, I wasn't too sure. I feel relieved. I think of something to reply, but I'm distracted by a group of cheerleaders who walk by, waving at Jade. She waves back at them from inside her car.
She turns to me and says, "I totally forgot to ask you! Are you gonna go to the game on Saturday? I know you normally don't, but I thought I could ask."
I'm a bit surprised she even knows I stopped going, but maybe I shouldn't be. She has remembered that I don't like listening to music, which is why she never turns it on, and I appreciate it. Jade seems to pay attention the way other people don't.
"I don't know..." I haven't been to a game since Olive's death since it used to be something we did together. I'm not sure I want to go when she can't go with me anymore, so I tell Jade I won't. I feel a bit bad because she actually looks disappointed.
"Are you sure? We could go together if you want to. I'll cheer with the others, but there's still time when I won't. And I'm sure Nate wants you to go, too."
She sounds hopeful, and she does have a point. Nate has been talking about it for the whole week. He asked me more than once to go, so I know he'd be happy if I would.
Maybe I really should go, maybe it will be fun.
"You know what? I think I just changed my mind. I think I'll go."
Jade beams at me. "Great! I'll pick you up."
YOU ARE READING
here without you
Novela Juvenil"Whoever I was when I was with her doesn't exist any longer. That version of me is just as dead as she is." Roze Foxton's older sister Olive took her own life, leaving Roze behind devastated. Without her sister her life seems to have fallen apart, b...
