here without you

34

"So you're officially dating now?"

"I guess so."

"That's so cute, Nate. I'm really happy for you."

In the distance, I see Jade entering the school with Jaxon. I have to think about our kiss - or kisses I should say. I feel the smile on my face turning even wider.

"You seem really happy," Nate says.

"About you and Stephanie dating? Of course I am."

"That's not what I mean. You've already been happy this morning, before I even told you about Stephanie and me." He looks at me. "Did something happen?"

Yes, Jade and I kissed!

"No, nothing happened. I'm just really happy for you, that's all. I know you've liked Stephanie for a very long time, and now you guys are finally together."

"Roze, you're a great liar, but I know you. I know it when you're not telling me the truth."

I look out of the window, avoiding his eyes.

"Why don't you just tell me? Obviously it can't be anything bad if it's making you this happy." He doesn't even sound mad. His voice is rather calm.

Just tell him.

"First, you need to promise me not to tell anyone."

"Roze, it's me, Nathaniel Joshua Martin, your best friend since you moved here - which was about seven years ago."

He realises that I'm being serious, and the amusement in his voice vanishes. "Okay, I promise. If you need to hear it, I promise. I won't tell anyone."

I don't look at him when I tell him. I stare out of the car window.

"Jade and I... We..." I swallow. "We... kissed."

I carefully turn my head into his direction, looking at him. His eyebrows are raised. He looks slightly surprised, but not shocked.

"I guess that explains a lot."

"Sorry?"

"Well, for example, it explains how you acted at the party. Or why it bothered you so much that she kissed Evan. Or -"

"Wait. So you... You knew?"

"Well, I guess no, but... kinda? I don't know." He shrugs. "I just noticed that chemistry between you two, and also your weird behaviour."

I have to take a moment to think about Nate's words. I'm still thinking about them when he says, "You do know I don't mind, right? If you like girls - or Jade - then I don't have any problem with that."

"You don't?"

"Of course I don't. How can you even ask me that? I don't care whether you kiss girls or boys, Roze. The only thing that matters to me is that you're happy."

I should have known that Nate would react like this, but I still can't help but be relieved.

"Besides," he says, "I think I like Jade a lot more than Jackass."

It makes me laugh. I look over to Nate, and I see him grinning.

"What exactly does that mean though? Are you and Jade... dating?"

"No, we're not. We just... We kissed, that's all."

I shrug. I'm not even sure myself what Jade and I are - or what I want us to be.

"But you like her," Nate says.

"I guess so."

"And she likes you?"