blahblahgirlie_7
"Jungkook is slowly losing his mind. He's sitting in the corner of the practice room at 12 am because his best friend is a self conscious crackhead who refuses to practice his solo in front of the group, and insists on staying extra extra late to work on it alone. Well, alone aside from Jungkook, who is either considered too familiar to register as a person, or someone Tae is trying to legitimately seduce. Jungkook doesn't know which is worse for him."
Jeon Jungkook has been in love with Kim Taehyung for as long as he can remember.
~
Jungkook is slowly losing his mind. He's sitting in the corner of the practice room at 12 am because his best friend is a self conscious crackhead who refuses to practice his solo in front of the group, and insists on staying extra extra late to work on it alone. Well, alone aside from Jungkook, who is either considered too familiar to register as a person, or someone Tae is trying to legitimately seduce. Jungkook doesn't know which is worse for him.
Not registering as an actual person is... so deep in the friendzone there's no possible way out, which sort of defeats Jungkook's master plan to get his best friend to fall in love with him. On the other hand, Jungkook's pretty sure he would spontaneously combust if Tae actually put any amount of effort into seducing him.
Because Jungkook is eternally hopeful, he decides the friendzone is a safer place to be. The friendzone can't be a permanent state, and Jungkook's pretty hard to resist. He's confident that with enough effort on his part, he could worm his way into Tae's heart. Seduction, however, is something that Jungkook absolutely cannot handle. Even the thought of it makes him feel a little weak.
The thing is, Tae doesn't need to seduce Jungkook. Not even a little bit. As if his new song isn't seduction enough, Jungkook was already head over heels for his bandmate.
When the group first met, Jungkook will readily admit he was almost painfully shy, and Taehyung... was not. At all. In fact, he was pretty much the opposite, and Jungkook credits his constant exuberance to being able to come out of his shell.
It was Tae who dragged Jungkook out of the practice room to eat with the rest of the boys, Tae who woke Jungkook up at the crack of dawn to watch the sunrise, Tae who snuck into Jungkook's bed at night when he was too anxious to function.
Without Tae, Jungkook would be... lost. He's not sure when he started loving him, but how could he possibly not? Tae, who tries so hard to be enough for the rest of them, who hides his real feelings to spare others, who always texts Jungkook good morning and good night, who wants to be a saxophonist, of all things.
A saxophonist! Who the fuck would want to be a saxophonist, except for Tae? Jungkook laughs humorlessly. He knows his friend better than himself, and he loves him more than that too, and sometimes it hurts so much it feels like a punishment. The first time they all met as a group was overwhelming for Jungkook. He wasn't used to being part of large groups, and participation was far beyond his social skills. Everyone else had been so excited about being part of the group that they just... allowed Jungkook to fade into the background. Everyone except Tae.
Tae saw Jungkook, saw him right from the beginning, and grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the shadows where he preferred to reside. He drew Jungkook into conversation too easily, and at first Jungkook was scared of the immediate closeness they shared. He didn't like letting people in; too afraid they would see who he really was and discover that they didn't really like that part of him.
Tae never made him feel like that. When he talked about his real passions, painting and photography and film, Tae didn't tell him that men didn't do art. He looked at Jungkook and his eyes glowed and he told him that he should never stop caring about it because when he talked about art his whole body lit up with joy.
Jungkook thinks that's when it happened.
It doesn't hurt that Tae is funny, and weird, and unapologetic. The first time he heard Tae talking to himself in an alien language, Jungkook was amazed that he had created an entire language of his own, and Tae happily taught it to him with a boxy grin. Now, Jungkook tries to use it as much as possible when they're alone because every time he does, Tae grins that same grin and Jungkook's heart flutters.
It certainly doesn't hurt that Tae is kind and soulful and empathic. He's always supported the other members at the cost of his own wellbeing, and Jungkook will forever be grateful that Tae can tell when he's upset and know exactly how to deal with it. He still creeps into Jungkook's bed at night after a particularly bad day and curls his long body around Jungkook and Jungkook always wonders how he could possibly sleep like that but wakes up feeling better than he's felt in months.
So yes, Jungkook has always loved Tae, but it's only recently that his crush has become actually debilitating.
"Jungkookie, what time is it?"
Jungkook cuts off his internal monologuing as Tae calls him loudly over the backing track. He looks down from where he's fixated his eyes on the ceiling and looks at his phone.
"It's 12:54. We should go to bed soon," He calls back, studiously avoiding looking at the drops of sweat that dampen Tae's brow.
"Not yet," Tae pleads, walking closer. Jungkook's lungs contract.
"We have rehearsal really early tomorrow," Jungkook argues, focusing on the wall slightly to Tae's left. Tae gets even closer and Jungkook thinks he might be having a heart attack.
"But I still need to perfect the choreography!" Tae pouts. Jungkook makes the mistake of glancing at him and Jesus, he might actually die if Tae doesn't stop doing that with his mouth. Jungkook wheezes and looks up at the ceiling, trying to think of as many boring and unsexy things as he can.
"Kook-ah," Tae says softly, recognizing that Jungkook is about to give in. Jungkook always gives in. He doesn't know why he tries sometimes.
"Just let me do one more run through, ok?" He's encroaching on Jungkook's personal space bubble and Jungkook hates it. He hates how much he doesn't hate it, and he hates that he can't grab Tae by his stupid white shirt and pull him into his lap. Jungkook should probably stop thinking about that soon. Except it's hard, when Tae's gotten so close, and he can feel the warmth radiating off his body, and his shirt is sliding down his shoulder, and Jungkook is starting to panic.
"Please?" Tae's voice is different, and Jungkook glances at him, and immediately regrets his entire existence. Tae's skin is golden and glistening, and he can see way too much of it in his immediate vicinity. Tae tilts his head, and Jungkook's eyes are drawn to his neck like a moth to a flame. Jungkook catches himself before he can wonder what it would taste like. Instead, he watches a drop of sweat make its way down Tae's neck and Tae watches Jungkook watch him and his eyes look... hungry. Jungkook needs to leave.
"Yes! One more time!" He leaps up off the floor, startling Tae. He was not prepared for his action to bring their chests flush together. Jungkook feels Tae inhale and he flinches back before Tae can feel him.
"I'm just going to get some water and then I'll be right back!" He calls over his shoulder as he speed walks out of the room.
Jungkook collapses to the floor as soon as he's out of the practice room. He's so turned on he can barely think straight and he's pretty sure he's hyperventilating. Or maybe he's panicking. Little white spots flash across his vision and he tries to catch his breath but it's so hard when he can't stop watching that small drop of sweat make it's way down Tae's neck.
It plays through his mind over and over, along with that innocent head tilt and wide brown eyes. And the way his shirt slipped off his shoulder, revealing his gorgeous collarbone. And the way his voice went deep and low when he said please.
...
Dear god. Jungkook needs to stop hearing that please reverberate in his ears or he's never going to be able to walk back into that practice room. He tries to take a deep breath but he can't stop thinking about Tae and the things he wants to do to him.
Holy fuck, the things he wants to do to him; Jungkook could write a paragraphs about all the things he wants to do to Tae. He could write an essay. Hell, he could write an entire fucking novel, with chapters dedicated to the way Tae's hair falls into his eyes, and the way he pokes his tongue out of his mouth, and the sound of his voice rough with sleep, and the way his hips sway when he walks, and his ass... Jungkook wants to worship his ass.
Jungkook groans. All of his thinking is not exactly making his... problem go away. The worst thing is that this isn't a new problem. It's not even close. It happens as often as Jungkook sees Tae, which is every day, for hours at a time, and usually he's singing in a voice so low and dark Jungkook can feel it in his bones, or he's dancing and rolling his hips to a beat that drops Jungkook's stomach. The number of times Jungkook's run out of a dance practice, or a recording session, or even a group meeting is frankly humiliating.
He's surprised the other members haven't noticed. That's a lie. He's not surprised they haven't noticed because they have, and they tease him constantly about it. He's surprised that Tae doesn't know by now, because surely if he knew, he wouldn't be subjecting Jungkook to this torture. Because it's torture, the best kind, listening to Tae sing Singularity over and over again and Jungkook couldn't ever forget the melody if he tried. It's ingrained in his brain like all his memories of Tae, like how much he loves him, like how it feels to be in love with him. Jungkook doesn't think he could stop if he tried.
He needs to pull himself together. He's not sure how long he's been in the hallway, but he's definitely been out there for longer than is necessary for a water break. If he waits too long, Tae will come looking for him, concerned and anxious, and he'll put his arm around Jungkook, and Jungkook really doesn't think he'd survive physical contact with Tae right now. Jungkook takes a deep, grounding breath. He thinks about the smell of curdled milk and his grandmother walking in on him in the shower. He's ready. He stands up and opens the practice room door.
He's not ready. Tae is facing the mirrors on the opposite wall of the room, slowly working through the steps of the dance. He's flushed from exertion, and his face is a mask of intense concentration. It's silent except for their breathing; Jungkook's fast and soft, Tae's harsh and ragged. Tae executes a near perfect pirouette and Jungkook is captivated by his strength and grace. He gasps, startling Tae, who spins around.
Their gazes meet across the expanse of the room. Tae's eyes are wide and dark and innocent and Jungkook thinks for a second about how fragile Tae is, how much Jungkook wants to protect him. For a moment they stare at each other, breathing, Jungkook's fast and soft, Tae's harsh and ragged. The moment is electric.
Then Tae's face breaks into a grin and the tension is gone.
"Jungkookie, you're just in time!" Jungkook can't help but smile at Tae's enthusiasm, even at one in the morning. "I think I finally have it," Tae continues, walking in Jungkook's direction. He's tall and beautiful and Jungkook loves him.
He's sure he's making the stupidest face, but Tae either doesn't notice or doesn't care, because he brushes past Jungkook to restart the backing track. He steps back around Jungkook so they're face to face and he's so close Jungkook can see his individual eyelashes. An image of those eyelashes brushing his cheek as he closes his eyes against an onslaught of pleasure flashes across Jungkook's mind and he blushes furiously.
"Jungkook," Tae says seriously. "Watch me closely this time," Jungkook wonders how Tae knew he wasn't looking at him.
"What's so special about this time?" Jungkook asks, and he thinks it sounds normal, and not like he's desperately attracted to him. Tae's eyes turn dark but he giggles.
"You'll see," He says, tongue darting out to wet his lips. Jungkook stares for longer than he should and hates himself. He drags his eyes back to Tae, who's been watching him. He looks almost like he wants to do something, shifts almost imperceptibly forward, but he turns and walks over to the mirrors.
The music starts and Jungkook's breath stops. Tae's voice is the soft caress of his hand as it strokes across his face. Jungkook wants to be that hand. Tae's choreography is smooth and powerful as he transitions seamlessly between movements that are sharp and pointed and long and lithe.
The dancer in Jungkook wonders if Tae should join the dance line, is captivated by the precise way Tae controls his body and directs it to do what he wants. Jungkook wants to direct his body, to make him feel what he wants.
The animal in Jungkook wants to grab him by the hips and pin him to the mirrors in the dance room, wants to slide in behind him so they can rock together, wants to lick down his neck and taste him, wants to take him apart and hear his voice echo through the room. Jungkook is very good at ignoring the animal inside him.
He tries to see Tae only as a dancer, but the words are so moving and the movements so uniquely Tae that he can't. The song transitions into the chorus and Tae transitions into a deep body roll.
Wait a minute.
Jungkook is 90% sure that body roll wasn't in the choreography before.
Tae rolls his body again, this time sliding a hand down his front.
Jungkook blinks. He's 100% sure that body roll isn't part of the choreo. Jungkook starts to feel like he missed something important. Is that what Tae was talking about when he said to watch closely this time?
Tae does it again, and Jungkook needs him to stop, because he's painfully aroused at this point, and he might have a heart attack if he has to keep standing here. His pulse rushes in his ears.
Tae, reading Jungkook's mind, stops and smoothly turns to face Jungkook. His eyes are dark and wild, almost animalistic, when they connect with Jungkook's. Something clicks in the back of his mind. Jungkook takes a step forward.
The beat drops and Tae drops with it. His eyes never leave Jungkook's as he slowly slides up. He smirks.
Something in Jungkook snaps.
He's not aware of moving forward. He's only aware of Tae's lithe body pressed against his front, the small compressed noise he makes somewhere between a gasp and a whimper, the weight of Tae's head as he throws it back on his shoulder, and the rush of emotion he feels when Tae grabs his hands and slides them to his thighs.
"Jungkook," Tae says, grinding back into him. They both gasp and Tae chuckles drily.
"Taehyung," Jungkook answers, breathless, nuzzling into Tae's neck. The music continues and they find an easy rhythm together. Jungkook feels lightheaded as Tae rolls his hips down and throws an arm back around Jungkook. Jungkook grips his hips tighter, pulls back, and the new friction makes them both groan. Jungkook slides his thumb into the waistband of Tae's sweatpants and is rewarded with Tae shivering into him.
The song ends and they stop. They're both facing the mirror, and Jungkook looks up from where he's buried his face in Tae's neck. They're both sweaty and flushed, dark eyed and panting. Tae looks angelic and fragile in Jungkook's arms and something possessive rises up in Jungkook's chest. Jungkook watches Tae's eyes trail to where his hand is resting on his hip, inches from the outline of his dick. He's hard.
He's hard, they both are, and they realize it at the same time, eyes snapping to make contact through the mirror. They hold for one, two, three seconds and then Jungkook gently turns Tae in his arms. They're face to face.
They're so close Jungkook can feel Tae's breath on his lips, soft puffs of warm air that heat his blood and make his heart race. Tae's eyes are wide and bright and surprised. Jungkook licks his lips unconsciously and Tae glances down for a heartbeat. Jungkook wants to kiss him.
He gently takes Tae by the chin and guides his face up so he can't look away. His mouth is wide and pink and curved into a smug smirk. Jungkook thinks he understands.
"I'm going to kiss you now," He says quietly, seriously. Tae's smirk turns even smugger.
"Fucking finally-" He begins, but Jungkook's lips are covering his and he closes his eyes and sighs.
Kissing Tae feels... right. Like wiping off the stage makeup and feeling comfortable in his own skin, like finishing a puzzle and finally seeing the whole picture, like finding a home he never knew he was missing. Tae's body fits perfectly against his, like he was made to be there, like he was made to be in Jungkook's arms, like maybe they've been like this before.
Jungkook's hands slide into Tae's hair, brushing over the back of his neck, and tug gently. Tae's mouth parts, and Jungkook pulls back from his lips. Tae looks at him amusedly.
"I thought you were never gonna make a move," He tries to sound cocky, but his breath hitches on the last word as Jungkook licks a stripe up his neck.
"I thought the song would work," Tae continues, winding his fingers into Jungkook's hair. "But you just sat there!" He's a little bit whiny, and Jungkook laughs into his neck. "It's not funny," Tae pouts. Jungkook mouths over his collarbone and Tae makes a compressed little noise that makes Jungkook's blood burn. "I was getting desperate," Jungkook presses closer and Tae takes a little step back.
"What were you going to do next?" Jungkook asks, not really curious. He's just enjoying the way Tae's voice changes when Jungkook does something he likes, enjoying the way his voice has gotten progressively lower.
"Strip," Tae says, completely seriously. Jungkook pauses. That is... a dangerous image for Jungkook. Suddenly, he needs more.
"Stop talking," He says. Tae looks smug.
"Make me," He challenges, and Jungkook thinks that's the best idea he's heard all day.
He slowly presses Tae back into the mirror, capturing his hands and pulling them above his head. He's taller than Tae like this, caging him with his body, and the sight of Tae vulnerable and open and wanting underneath him makes Jungkook's head swim with a heady power. He wants to wreck Tae, make him feel everything.
He leans down to kiss him, opening his mouth and licking inside. Tae groans as his tongue slides against Jungkooks, arching up into his body. His arms tug weakly against Jungkook's hold and Jungkook lets go, hands sliding under Tae's shirt.
Tae's skin is warm and sweat-damp and Jungkook needs to feel more of his. He breaks the kiss to pull it over Tae's head and presses closer. Tae leans in and drags his teeth down the side of his neck and Jungkook feels electrified, like his skin is too tight over his bones. He needs more.
Tae grabs Jungkook's shirt and nearly rips it trying to get it over his head but then he's done and pressing against Jungkook and he's sure he's going to pass out because it feels too good. He slips a leg between Tae's and Tae immediately ruts against it, moaning quietly. Jungkook wants to hear Tae moan again, wants to make him moan again, so he reaches down between them to palm at Tae. He's rewarded with a loud groan and Tae's knees buckling.
He kisses him harder, licking behind his teeth, feeling the slick slide of Tae's tongue against his. His fingers are tingly and shaking as they dig into Tae's shoulders and his heart feels like it's shuddering under the weight of his emotions. Then Tae grinds their hips together and pleasure arcs through Jungkook's body.
"Tae," Jungkook says tremulously. "Please," He doesn't know what he begging for, just that everything is too much and not enough and he's going to die if something doesn't happen soon. He slides his hands into the back of Tae's sweats, dragging his nails, and Tae gives a surprised squeak that ends in a low moan.
Tae slides down the mirror, pulling Jungkook with him. He slams their mouths together as Jungkook settles in his lap, finally able to grind their erections together. Tae's head hits the mirror with a soft thump and Jungkook takes that as his cue to lean down and lick a stripe across Tae's nipple.
They slip down further so they're lying on the floor and Jungkook has to take a minute. This is... everything. He's pretty sure he's had dreams of this exact scenario, of Tae warm and wanting under him, panting into his mouth. Tae leans up to kiss Jungkook's neck.
"Thought about this," He says, tiling his head to give Tae more room. Tae hums interestedly.
"Thought about you under me," Jungkook continues, rutting gently into Tae.
"You're so pretty," He says, stroking him. Tae whines. Something possessive in Jungkook makes him want to leave marks all over the pale column of Tae's throat, and he leans down, reaching for the drawstring of Tae's pants.
"Stop," Tae says, pushing himself up. The action pushes their hips together and Jungkook hisses at the contact.
"What," says Jungkook, confused.
"We're not about to have sex on the floor of the dance room," Tae says.
"Why not?"
"It's a wood floor," Tae says, as if it explains everything.
"So," says Jungkook. He's not about to let a fucking floor stop him from the only thing in the world he wants.
"So it's hard and uncomfortable and our first time is not going to be some quickie on the floor," Tae says calmly. Jungkook does not feel calm.
"Jungkook," says Tae warningly. "I'm not going to let you fuck me on the wood floor," Jungkook doesn't hear the end of the sentence. He's too stuck on 'let you fuck me'.
"Fine," says Jungkook, standing up. He reaches down to help Tae, pulling him into his arms. "But I'm going to fuck you so hard your bed leaves a dent in the wall," He says, lips brushing Tae's ear. There's a heartbeat where Tae's eyes get impossibly wide and Jungkook thinks Tae might throw him down on the floor before Tae grabs his arm in a vice-like grip and yanks him out of the room. Jungkook follows, laughing.
Later, much later, Jungkook is laying on top of an equally sated Tae. They're both soft and wonderful and Jungkook thanks every single god he can think of that allowed him to have this moment. Tae is everything he's ever dreamed of and more. Jungkook is still in awe that Tae likes him back, maybe even loves him.
How can someone be so perfect? he wonders. He pushes himself up on an elbow so he can see Tae more clearly in the moonlight. Like this he looks almost fae-like, ethereal and untouchable, except by Jungkook. He has the strange, vivid thought that his lover is made of gossamer and starlight, his eyelashes tiny dreamcatchers. Jungkook has never felt so mortal, or so endless.
He gently strokes Tae's cheek, wondering how someone this perfect could ever chose him, yet here they are. The trust Tae's given him humbles him, makes him want to do everything he can to deserve it, makes him want to drop to his knees and worship him. Jungkook has never felt so lucky.
"Stop staring," Tae mumbles sleepily.
"I wasn't staring," Jungkook mutters, embarrassed.
"Yes you were," Tae says. "I can feel it," Jungkook huffs a soft laugh against his cheek. He can't deny it.
"You're beautiful," He says softly, enthralled. Tae blushes and slowly opens his eyes. Jungkook's heart threatens to explode and he sort of wants to cry.
"So soft for me, huh?" Tae teases, but he's still blushing.
"So true," Jungkook whispers, brushing the hair off Tae's face. Tae looks at Jungkook so intensely, so lovingly, so trustingly, that it makes Jungkook's heart sing and his breath catch. A single ray of moonlight crosses Tae's face. Tae takes Jungkook's hand and softly kisses his palm.
"I love you," says Jungkook, the words spilling out of his mouth because it hurts to keep them in. "I love you so much," He says. "You're beautiful and I love you,"
Tae looks at him like he hung the moon and it's too much for Jungkook to handle.
"How long?" Tae asks softly, holding Jungkook like he's something procious.
"So long," Jungkook says. "I've loved you so long, " He says. "Like breathing," He says.
"Me too," says Tae softly. "Like breathing."
