Marvel Oneshots And Crack

Captain America~Super Soldiers Need A Nap Too

The serum might make Steve not tire easily, but everyone needs sleep. Maybe it exhausts him even more, because of his high metabolism and healing abilities.
Yeet.

Steve POV

The atmosphere was pleasant in the little Middle Eastern restaurant as six Avengers sans Loki ate together. The shwarma was delicious, a welcome treat after getting their asses kicked. The dim lighting was also welcoming; at least a few of them had concussions.

One of them, Steve Rogers, who sat at the head of the table, was more subdued than usual. Exhaustion had been building in him for hours-no, scratch that. Days of not properly sleeping, plus his extreme metabolism and healing abilities, was beginning to take its toll.

Thor frowned at Steve, whose head was beginning to droop. It was rather unlike Steve; he was always bursting with serum-induced energy. But now he was quietly slumped over in his chair, shwarma on his plate long ago eaten.

The Norseman touched Steve's arm. "Friend Steve. Are you alright?"

The soldier straightened up with the lethargy of a drunk. To complete the illusion of his lack of sobriety, a dopey smile adorned his face. "Heyyyy."

Bruce, who sat on Steve's right, also frowned in concern. "Did Steve hit his head, guys?"

Steve swayed in his seat, eyes unfocusing. "Need to sleep. The serum...it makes me tired. Gonna...crash... soon."

Thor steadied the sleep-drunk super soldier, chuckling. "How long do you have until you crash, Steve?"

Tony's head popped up from across the table. "Whoa, Capsicle. Do we need to find a cot for you? Capsicle? Steve? You okay, buddy?"

Steve appeared to be struggling to keep his eyes open. "I'm hungry."

Bruce was confused. "You literally just ate five shwarma sandwiches."

Steve's usually stoic facial expression had changed to something akin to a pout. "I need chocolate cake. It'll help me stay awake. Is there cake here? Do they have cheesecake? I really want a chocolate cheesecake."

Tony stood up. "Alright, someone get this man a cheesecake."

Tony, Natasha, and Clint scoured the entire restaurant and street for New York cheesecake.

Finally, Clint dropped from a street lamp, holding a container of cheesecake. Tony sighed in relief. "Only took us eight minutes. Let's go, he didn't actually say how long it is until he crashes."

The Avengers went back inside the restaurant, where Thor and Bruce seemed to be holding Steve upright in his chair. Natasha unceremoniously plopped the cheesecake in front of Steve.
The veteran's eyes immediately opened. A bright smile replaced his sleepy frown. "You-you actually got cake?!"

Tony chuckled. Steve suddenly looked so much younger. He tossed Steve a can of grape soda. The blonde looked at it like it was Jesus' slipper. "You...you got me a fizzy, too?! You really are the best! Oh my goodness, you have no idea..."

Steve covered his face. Clint softly laughed. "Wait, are you getting emotional? Over soda and chocolate cheesecake?"

Tony elbowed him. "Hey, he's had a long day. We've all had a long day."

•••••••••

"Alright, fellas. Let's go to the...tower. Stark Tower."

Steve's energy had been replenished somewhat by the soda in his hand and satisfying his cheesecake cravings. However, he was still sleep drunk. Thor was steadying him with the hand not carrying Mjolnir.

The six traipsed back to Stark Tower. Steve changed out of his suit and into an old fashioned night shirt and pants. After saying his nighttime prayers, he curled up on the sofa with his cheesecake and grape soda.

Tony saw Steve and sighed. "Please don't spill that on my couch. And you can put that cake in the refrigerator."

Steve gave the cake to Tony as he sat up, slowly sipping the can of fizzy grape heaven.

Natasha sat by Steve on the sofa, crossing her legs. "You never answered us, Steve. How long do you have until you crash?"

Steve took another swig of grape soda. A content smile was his only response until he blinked and looked at Natasha. "Three hours."

After finishing the can and discarding it, Steve stood up and...fell over.

Natasha rolled her eyes fondly. "I guess he only had a half hour."

Thor lifted the snoring supersoldier off the floor and laid him on the couch with all the tenderness of a father. "He is hard on himself. We shall let him rest!"