Across the Divide and Through Valhalla

Now You Know

Chapter 27

Genesis gave her a nod and turned to head back to where the others were still conversing. Sherry leaned against the tree and closed her eyes. It was only a few moments later that she felt someone near her again and opened them to see Cloud was standing close by and giving her an unreadable look. She felt a pang of regret for yelling at him and started to apologize, but he spoke before she could.

"I want to apologize for pushing you and for eavesdropping. I didn't mean to."

She grimaced when she realized he must have heard her talking to Genesis. She was going to have to remember that most of the men around her had superhuman senses. If she wanted to keep something secret, she had to go much further. She shook that thought off before she answered. "I know, and I should apologize as well. I let my temper get the best of me, and I shouldn't have. It isn't your fault."

He paused before he gave her a quick nod. He didn't move right away, though. She gave him a curious look before he finally spoke. "I don't want to stir things up again, but when you said you lost everything, including your childhood, were you talking about-"

He cut himself off at that point, but Sherry knew what he was getting at. She grimaced again and sighed, but she nodded. "Yes. I was never allowed to be a child. I am the oldest, and so it fell to me to protect my brother when I could. That's not counting all the other stuff."

Cloud gave her a look that was a mix of contrition and pity. She shook her head. "Don't feel sorry for me. It shaped me into who I am today, and I like me."

He couldn't hold back a small smile at her insistence, but his look quickly went back to concerned. "Does that mean you forgave him? The man that did- that did that to you?"

Sherry bit back on another sigh and nodded. "Yes. It didn't happen right away, but I eventually learned to let it go."

He shook his head. "How can you not hate someone that took so much from you?"

Sherry paused and tried to organize her thoughts so they would make sense. "First, I don't think I ever hated him. I was terrified of him for several years. When he was sentenced, he told me that he would kill me when he was released. That caused many nightmares, but eventually, I learned that holding on to the fear and pain was only hurting me. In order to really live, I couldn't be bound by my past. It was a liberating feeling when I realized I didn't have to feel like a victim for the rest of my life."

"After that, I eventually learned to see things from his point of view. It wasn't easy to get to that point, and don't think that means that I condone what he did, but I was able to see that he was pitiful. He wasn't a being worthy of my regard in any way. Once I realized that I knew that it was all in my past and would stay there. My future was mine alone."

She gave him a crooked smile, even if it didn't reach her eyes. "I know you have your reasons, and you are justified in how you feel, but I can no longer look at things from just one side anymore."

When he gave her an incredulous look, she laughed lightly. "Don't worry, most of my friends don't understand either. It's just me."

He shook his head at her quip and gave her a small smile. "You know, I think you would have gotten along well with Aerith."

Sherry felt her heart lurch but managed to smile anyway. "I would have liked to have known her."

She could see the sadness in his eyes, but he still managed to sound hopeful. "Maybe you will get the chance."

Sherry had to clench her jaw. She knew it could never happen, even if she succeeded, but that wasn't Cloud's fault, and she didn't want him to lose the spark she finally saw in his eyes, so she just nodded. "Why don't we get back to the others? I imagine dinner will be done soon."