Wake Me Up

Another Lie: A dream

Dionne's POV

Then again, I dreamed of you, but I realized it was another lie .. or was it real? I don't know anymore. I couldn't tell what's real from all the memories I have in my mind. I have a lot of it but all seemed a dream .. and hard to believe.

When I closed my eyes, I saw you there standing and blankly staring at me. Before I could lose my consciousness, I know you were there.

Do we have telepathy between our hearts?

Maybe not. Maybe we don't have. But I saw the glints of sorrow in your eyes. How could you make me suffer with all your bitterness? Maybe you were still there surrounded by darkness .. and far awake.

" .... maybe you're experiencing dream telepathy .." Ate Melcca's voice echoed inside my head.

"What is that?" I asked with confusion.

Parang lalong lumalabo sa akin ang lahat. Wala talaga akong alam sa mga ganitong bagay ..

"Nasabi kasi sa'kin ni Lorry na na-meet mo yung taong nasa panaginip mo .. and I think that was made possible because of your dreams. And if my guess is right that person is also experiencing that same situation." Sa dami ng sinabi niya ay isa lang ang tumatak sa akin.

Is it possible that we're in the same situation? Napapanaginipan niya din ba ako?

"Dream telepathy is a subtype of Lucid dreaming, but I'm a bit confused. If what you've experienced was really dream telepathy, then he should be acting almost the same scenario or the same behavior in your dream when you guys met .." She looked at me when she cut her words. She then diverted her gaze to Ate Lorielle who also looks confused.

"Is it possible that he's just fighting that dream and acting like in reverse psychology?" Ate Lorielle asked after sipping on her milk tea.

Nakakalungkot lang dahil hindi ako makasabay sa mga sinasabi nila, hindi ko sila maintindihan .. They are using alien words ..

"It could be .. maybe it is the reason why he's always mad at you .." Ate Melcca looked at me with conviction in her eyes.

"I don't understand .." I honestly looked at them with my begging eyes.

Oh, please .. make me understand these things ..

"Do you think he's also having the same dream as you? And he was just hiding it through quarreling .. maybe he couldn't admit the fact that .. he's dreaming of you without acceptable reason?" I furrowed from what she said.

"That's impossible!" I exclaimed with my bitter face.

But .. what if it's true?

"There's only one way to prove that .." sandaling huminto si Ate Lorielle at saka seryosong tumingin sa amin.

I looked at her with my questioning look.

"Ask him .. talk to him?" She's hesitating but I also think it's a good idea. But how?

Paano ko iyon sasabihin sa kanya? If I told him everything and it's a fail, of course he'll know that I've been dreaming of him .. but what will I do then? Should I really need to talk to him?

I felt more confused as I came back home. I went inside my room and rest my exhausted body.

Ilang sandali pa ang lumipas at naramdaman ko na ang pagbigat ng aking mga talukap.

"I'm sorry .. I .. am so .. sorry!"

Paulit-ulit na naglalaro ang mga salitang iyon sa aking isip. That familiar voice is keeping me to dream more and dive from the deepest sea of darkness.

I looked at him and caressed his weary face. Malinaw na nakaguhit sa kanyang mga mata ang sobrang pagsisisi. And I can't blame him. Everything happened so fast until we couldn't control the consequences.

"Even if you'd hurt me a lot .. I still love you. At hindi na magbabago yun." Hindi ko binitiwan ang kanyang mga mata habang sinasambit ang mga salitang iyon.

"No. Please, don't say that .." he cupped my face and put his forehead onto mine.

Napakalalim ng bawat paghinga na kanyang pinakakawalan na para bang napakarami niyang iniisip at hindi alam kung paano iyon ilalabas ..

"I can't stop my heart though .. I know I'll just continue to love .. you." Halos hindi ko na magawang sambitin ng maayos ang aking sinasabi dahil sa nagbabantang mga luha na nagnanais kumawala.

Bahagya niyang inilayo sa akin ang kanyang mukha at saka seryoso akong tinitigan. Those looks in his eyes brings shiver down my spine. He's like in a cloud of confusions and ambiguity.

"Who are you?" That's what he said to me after a long silence.

"W-what do you mean?" Unti-unting nanlabo ang aking mga mata dahil sa mga luhang sabay-sabay na kumawala.

"You've caused me trouble .. since the day I've met you, you've brought me nothing but immeasurable agony."

May bahid nang pagkalito ang kanyang tinig ngunit kabaliktaran ng kanyang mga matang napuno ng lungkot. I can feel the growing confusion in his mind, just like me who couldn't find any answer from all of my fantasy.

Marahan niyang pinahid ang mga luhang nagsimulang bumalong sa aking pisngi.

"I'm sorry .. I coudn't control my feelings.  But believe me I've tried. I've tried to forget you. I've tried to walk away many times .. just to stop all this nonsense. But I keep on coming back .."  I stopped for a moment when he pulled me closer to his chest.

Agad kong ibinaon ang aking mukhang basa pa rin ng luha sa malapad niyang dibdib. Patuloy pa rin sa pagbalong ang mga iyon kasabay ng banayad niyang paghaplos sa aking buhok.

"Whenever I tried to close my eyes and saw your face .. I warned myself that it's just a lie. It was just another lie because we were only inside of my lucid dream."

Naramdaman ko ang marahang pagdampi ng kanyang labi sa aking buhok kasabay ng mga kamay niyang mahigpit na iniyakap sa aking katawan.

"You were just a dream and another lie, right?" I distance my face inches apart from him to see his bothered eyes.

" If this is just a dream .. If we were just in a dream, I will never let you go. I will love you there, forever, just so you won't leave me ... Stay with me, please?"

Puno ng pagsusumamo ang kanyang tinig habang direktang nakatitig sa akin ang kanyang mga mata.

How could I stay away from him now?

Now that I heard it from his mouth, I couldn't let go of him anymore. I think I'd rather live in this lucid dream of mine .. than living in reality without him. I'd rather live with all this lie than living in reality without him beside me.

Until another voice echoed inside my head ..

"Dionne ..!"