Strangerzone (Completed ✔️)

#24

Dear Diary,

"...Ik lamhe mein kitni
Yaadein ban jaati hain
Main itna hansti hoon
Aankhen bhar aati hai

Mainu ishq tera lae dooba
Haan ishq tera lae dooba..."

("...So many memories
get formed in just one moment
I laugh so much that
tears come in my eyes

Your love has drowned me
Yes, your love has drowned me...")

Everytime I hear this song named 'Lae dooba', it really hits me hard.

I want to move on... Want to forgot you... But I can't.

I don't know when and how you became so important in my life that I can't stay without thinking about you but then there you are, with someone else who is not me.

I don't know if I can love someone as much as I did love you but I will make sure to love him the most.

I thought you love me too. I was even okay with you liking me but we can't force anyone to love or like us, right..?

'If he was not meant to be mine, then why do you bring him in my life..?'

I asked God for the nth time. I myself don't remember how many times I asked God this question but I never got an answer.

"Have you felt like someone is meant to be yours but the next very time, he is not yours. Have you ever..?"

Once a girl asked me. At that time, I couldn't answer her. How can I when I never felt like that.

I was girl who was studying and enjoying my life with my family, I never had problems with my love life because I thought everything has a right time.

If I meet that girl now, I will surely answer her question.

'When I saw him, I thought he is the one for me but the very next day I came to know his sadness. I was with him at every step but he never knew about my existance. I cried with him, for him and everything I did was for him. I even forgot my parents because of him but in the end, he left me.

I know I never confessed my feelings to him but is he blind..? Because everyone around me knew about my crush on him. I was like a love sick girl who knew every single thing about you. From your favourite colour to your favourite food. Everything means everything.

I don't know how I managed to get this all information about you but I did because I love you.

Everyone says that 'Chance to get married to your first love is given to very rare people' and I wanted to become one of that rare people. I wanted to sit beside you in front of the holy fire and take 7 rounds around it with you. But you broke. You broke my every single dream which I saw with you by my side.

The feeling of first love is really very special but at the same time it's horrible.... A horrible experience. It's special because it thought us to love, a very special feeling and it's horrible in case because our love story was left incomplete.

Yours,
Vaishnavi.