SERAPHINA

CHAPTER 50

Billie Eilish: When I was older👆

~Success won't knock on your door if you don't invite it beforehand ~
~Mina.

SERAPHINA'S POV
"Whether it had to do with our bodies or simply our personalities, as models we've succumbed to rejections from agencies. We had fallen and will continue falling on runways because hey, we're not robots. We're human and we get exhausted, but that doesn't work in the industry. They just don't care.

We're claimed to have the out-of-the-ordinary body, the perfect posture and an attractive personality. To the public eye, anyone possessing these attributes is the luckiest person born to earth. But the sad reality is that despite all these. The money, the looks, the fame, we'll never be good enough for the industry.

Before becoming a supermodel, I was rejected by more than twenty agencies, regardless of having decades of experience in the business. To vogue, I was too skinny. To Victoria's Secret, I'd hip dip, and it's the undefined jawline for Sephora. There were a lot more and each for different reasons. Ones very unexpected. You see girls, the littlest things we ignore, are what cause the biggest plot twists in our lives.

It's okay to have insecurities, to feel body-shamed and self-conscious. However, what is not okay, is not knowing your worth. Modelling is great, but very toxic if you let it overpower your personal life, particularly, health-wise.

You might not know this, but in the industry, out of every hundred per cent, eighty are battling eating disorders resulting from an unhealthy obsession with meeting the agencies size zero requirements.

I've seen models breakdown backstage. I've seen models drink hardship away to death. Suicide became the latest trend.

I want you girls to know that you're beautiful, inside out. You're courageous, empathetic and determined. I want you to put everything behind you after the show and hold onto one another.
Remember, the girl in California may be different from the girl in New Jersey. The girl in Tennessee may differ from the girl in Pennsylvania, but remember what you all shared is the same motherland.

Thank you, and I wish you the ultimate best."

A round of applause followed after Deborah Wayward took down the stage.

"What a heartwarming speech." Nesthma, the model representing Ohio, cooed.

I have to admit. I was bored as fuck in the beginning, not being one to attend formal gatherings and all that. But, I gotta say I've never felt so inspired before.

It was three days to the fashion night and things had been twice as intense. From training to workouts and shopping. Peyton's been hard on my ass throughout the week, and I haven't been able to have a good night's sleep.

"I can't wait for the fashion week to be over."

"Me neither." Nesthma huffed out.

We had model counselling today, part of the preparation for the big day. The event was held at Jacob K. Javits Convention Centre and all the models chosen across the fifty-two states were present.

When I initially heard the word counselling, I was imagining a group of ten with a therapist but what I wasn't expecting was a continent of fashion icons, paparazzi, food, music and speeches. Bruh, who the hell called this counselling?