Falling For the Firefighter - Evan Buckley

Part 13: I'm an Idiot

Kisses

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--Erica's POV--

I hear Evan talking on the phone and move a little trying to get comfortable again. His hand pushes some hair behind my ear causing me to uncontrollably smile. He hangs up the phone and pulls me closer to him, "Morning," I whisper, getting in his arms again. The room gets quiet and we both sit in each others arms before I hear Mickey talking to someone in the other room, "Do you wanna talk about it?" he asks, kissing my forehead. I look up at him before realizing he's talking about last night.

"There are some things in my past that Danny was prodding at. You and I have become really close really fast...but I'm just not ready to tell anybody everything yet," I tell him.

"I understand. I'm here when you are ready to tell someone"

"Danny has some problem with you or us. I still don't know. He keeps mentioning how we don't know each other and that I shouldn't be sleeping with you yet," I say, feeling myself getting mad again.

"I think he's jealous of me getting to be with you," He tells me. I sit up and look at him confused, "What?"

"You do know that Danny wants to be with you right?" He asks with a confused face.

"No he doesn't. Why would he say those things if he wants to be with me?" I ask getting off the bed to grab Evan's sweatshirt. I stole it from his house and slip it on before he can protest. He sits on the edge of the bed taking my hands in his, "He loved meeting Eddie that night. With me he just brushed me off and acted as if I was some creep at a club. How much have you told him about us?" Evan asks.

"I'm always with Mickey and him and we talk about some stuff but not everything," I say, feeling my cheeks light up.

"So, you talked about our sexual relationship? You haven't told them the rest?" He asks looking offended.

"It's not like we are boyfriend girlfriend. Evan, I'm confused. Of course I love spending time with you what does it matter if I tell my friends everything. I'm not used to sharing my emotions with people. Trust me I loved our late night talks when I stayed at your house," I tell him as he stands up looking hurt.

"I just expected our relationship to move towards more of a relationship but maybe Danny is right. We do have lots of sex without any labels," He says with a frustrated smile.

"Are you saying you regret it? You regret everything we've done up until now? No longer than 20 minutes ago you were telling me you'd be there to talk," I point out.

"I need to get to work," he mumbles grabbing his phone. I follow him outside my bedroom door and watch him walk out in front of Mickey and Danny. I look at Danny before going back into my room. What is going on? Hot tears spill from my eyes and I quietly cry behind the door. I look at my phone and see that I have work in an hour and a half. I push away the tears and grab my towel. I head to the bathroom and ignore Mickey calling my name.

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I love working there but that was the most painful shift of my life. My shift was supposed to be from 11 am to 8 pm, but there was an emergency and I'm still at the center. I volunteered to stay so that Maddie could go home to her baby. But she ended up staying, but I love that about her. We are both drinking coffee in the break room before we head home.

"Hey...can I ask you something about Evan?" I ask, putting my coffee down.

"Trouble in paradise?" she jokes.

"We had a fight earlier. I said things that didn't show how I actually felt about him and I regret everything about it. I want to be in a relationship with him and I know he does too," I tell her.

"So, what's the problem? Just tell him the truth then,"She says. She's right. I'm always afraid to put my self out there. Talking through things was never my specialty but that's the easiest way to show Evan how I feel.

"I'm an idiot. You're right, Maddie," I say, kissing her cheek and running out making her laugh. I grab my keys from my desk and run out to my car.