Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I feel like after the chapter I wrote last night, I need to reassure you guys that I'm ok 😂
I went through a period for a few weeks or months or something where more often than not, I would just feel really empty and it kinda scared me lol
I watched my ex best friend slowly lose more and more of herself until she was nothing but an empty shell and her lifeless eyes scared me so much, so I was terrified that I was becoming like her
I think I might've gone through a mini depression or something 😂 I don't know how to explain it, but it was like a switch would turn off inside me and I just couldn't feel anything anymore and it felt like my brain kept disconnecting me from the world, and it started happening more and more frequently
It happened at school once and I said "I can't feel anything" as a joke (even though it was anything but a joke) and Blanc just said "Throne of Glass" and I could literally feel the emotions rush back, like I became human again, like my life filled with color again (it sounds really dramatic but that's how it felt lol)
And she has no idea how much that meant to me 😭😭
Don't really know what happened to me during those weeks/months but I think it has to do with the fact that I'm the rock of my family, I'm the one who keeps everything together so I feel like I have to be strong for everyone - which has led me to stop talking about my problems and suppress my feelings, which then led to the inability to express my feelings (and occasionally not feel any emotions at all) :'>
So yeah, I went through that little scare for a while and then Misty got really sick and I cried for her and that's when I realized that I really do still feel and I've been ok ever since XD
Which brings me to my next topic: I think Misty had a cold or something because she was constantly sneezing for a while and then she started eating less and less, until the point where she just wouldn't eat anymore and she became sickly thin (she's always been skinny but it got really bad)
So we took her to the vet about two weeks ago and explained the situation, and were told to come back and drop her off the next day so they could do some tests
They took a blood test and couldn't find anything, but there were signs that there was something wrong with her liver so they sent the blood sample to the city for some testing
I was such a wreck that whole week - especially when we had to sign a paper because they were gonna drug her up for the testing and there's obviously risks involved with that
So that was an awful way of the universe to prove to me that I do still have emotions 😭
Anywho, the results came back last Thursday
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH HER LIVER!!!! 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
No cancer or anything, her liver is completely healthy!!! I cried the moment I heard the news because I was just so relieved
