TART The Sequel (TART 4)

Improvement?!

I stayed home yesterday and today too :'>

I went to school very quickly to grab some books after school was over yesterday, so I can work on the schoolwork I missed over the weekend ^^; I ran into two of my teachers when I walked in and they both asked how I was feeling and I felt so guilty for showing my face there without actually going to school that day T_T

The worst part is that I really don't look of sound sick, I just feel sick ;-; I had the messiest ponytail ever and I was bundled up in a huge hoodie and a scarf and everything, but other than that I pretty much look normal, so I was so scared that they were thinking that I'm just skipping school! T_T

At least I have my schoolbooks now :') My cold hadn't improved at all yesterday, but I am actually feeling better today! I still have that headache and my throat still hurts and I'm still a little tired, but the nausea and dizziness is gone and most of my energy has returned! So I'm getting better! :D

So I got to finish a bit of my schoolwork today, and I managed to draw a lot so I'm feeling good XD

I might've passed my cold on to the rest of my family so everyone was home today as well :'> Luckily they've all been fighting it off really well and nobody has gotten as bad as I was yet

I even managed to take a walk today lol!

We had hot chocolate and watched the third Harry Potter movie today :3 I underestimated just how many Harry Potter quotes I know lmaoo

I seriously can't even begin to describe my love for Harry Potter, there's not a single flaw with the movies! 😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️💕💕💕❤️❤️ Now I just need to read all the books!! XD

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The Stand is doing things to me :'>

It's really good, but somehow it's scaring me more than actual horror stories?? Just imagine how scary it would be if that virus got out and the government was telling us lies, and everyone who got the virus was guaranteed to die!! Everyone around you is catching it and you don't know when you'll be the one slowly but surely dying from it

Or imagine being a survivor, walking through those empty, dead towns, knowing that every house is either empty or there's dying or dead people laying in there and you're all alone, not even knowing what is going on

And the government is doing everything they can to keep the truth from coming out, including assassinating everyone who tries to spread the truth and tell others

I don't know why this spooked me so bad last night XD I slept so horribly last night, it took me forever to fall asleep and I woke up constantly throughout the night T_T

I guess I can't read The Stand before going to bed either, my imagination is too wild and I'm too much of a chicken :'>

I've been oddly paranoid lately ;-; I dread going to my room at night because it's pitch black outside by the time I go down and I can't see anything outside my window, and ever since you-know-who came to my house in the middle of the night, I've been so paranoid that she's standing outside, just watching me

It doesn't help that I've had a dozen dreams about people stalking me and trying to kidnap and kill me etc, and of course my paranoid ass thinks "what if it's a sign?" XDD

A few days ago I dreamt that I walked into the living room in the middle of the night for whatever reason so it was pitch black outside and I couldn't see anything, and all of a sudden someone jumped up and slammed their body onto the window and just stared at me with a psychotic grin and I screamed and tried to run away and I was so scared I woke up T_T I still think about it and it still scares me!! 😭😭

I never wrote about this and I only just recently told someone (T) about this, but my dad told me something a few weeks ago and I haven't been sure if I should write it or not

I won't give away the details because it is somewhat personal, but my dad came into my room one night to talk to me, and he told me that he had run into you-know-who that day and asked her how she was doing, and she just immediately broke down

I don't know anymore about what happened during that encounter, but my dad went on to tell me a story. Long story short, he had a friend who was arguing with this one guy who, unbeknownst to my dad's friend, was going through a lot at the time and that fight was the last straw and he tried to commit suicide that night. My dad explained that even though it wasn't his friend that was in the wrong, his friend felt extremely guilty and it destroyed him

So he told me that he has seen people on the edge; and you-know-who was there. She was on the edge

He basically just wanted to warn me that I should take the high road no matter what because if she were to do something like that, he doesn't want me to feel any guilt like his friend did

And I've been even more paranoid since then, because there's nothing scarier than people on the edge; they've got nothing to lose

I know this is a huge exaggeration but I can't help but think that if she were to go to such drastic measures, what if she thought to bring someone along with her? Like how school shooters shoot their classmates before shooting themselves? Or people who kill their entire family before killing themselves?

Sorry, I've been meaning to get this off my chest because it's a thought that's been eating away at my brain for a while now XD I know it's ridiculous, but I can't help but think about it anyway

I really have done the best I can to take the high road and tried to end things nicely, but it doesn't seem like it's working. And I can't help but wonder how strong her hatred for me must be, or how many people she's gotten to hate me

Idk, I just wonder how far gone she is and how far she would be willing to go 😅 I don't know why I've been so paranoid lately lmao

I'm fine during the day, but the night comes around and the endless darkness outside my window scares the hell out of me and I can't help but imagine someone watching me...

I don't want to have enemies T_T

I don't wanna end this chapter like this so here's a meme lol