Incorrect Quote dump 22

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Sources: Frasier, myself, tumblr, the simpsons, parks and rec, super store, dead like me, reddit, futurama, twitter, scary movie 4, friends, iasip, malcolm in the middle, A million ways to die in the west, archer, monk

Featured AUs: Dad! Emmet, vampire, necromancer

Featured OC: Gidget{Emmet's adopted daughter.]

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[Pesselle giving Y/n and Ingo a medical check up, she has Y/n read an eye exam chart.]

Pesselle: *to Y/n* Alright just read off the first row down to the fifth.

[Y/n looking at eye exam chart]

Y/n: Uh, E, H, 4, M, potato shape, cup shape...

[Ingo looks at his wife than at the eye chart bemused as Pesselle slowly looks up from her notes and stares a Y/n stunned.]

Y/n: smudge, smudge, middle finger, smudge... the rest are all smudges.

Ingo: *horrified* Arc's bane, They've been making you wander off and do fieldwork alone?!

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[Dad au! Emmet is forced to drive his estranged aunt to the airport.]

Rude aunt: It's a bloody miracle we're here in one piece what with the way you drive.

Emmet: I'm better at it when someone's not screaming in my ear.

Rude aunt: Well, in my day people didn't drive so recklessly. Do you know why?

Gidget: Is it because you all rode fossil Pokémon?

Rude Aunt: Why I never, You best set that stray right boy!

Emmet: [to Gidget, after his aunt storms off] When we get home, you're getting your favorite pizza and ice cream.

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{Vampire au]

E-S/o: *notices a red stain on Emmet's coat collar* Is that blood?

Emmet:(looks at stain)........No?

{Ingo facepalms}

E-S/o: That's a question you shouldn't answer with another question.

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Emmet: We have a problem.

Ingo: No, you have a problem. I have an idiot brother who keeps making them.

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[E-S/o falls out of a tree Emmet catches them.]

Emmet: I think you just-

E-S/o: Don't.

Emmet: Fell for me.

E-S/o: Put me the f*ck down Emmet.

{Emmet starts to walk away still carrying them in his arms.]

E-S/o: *cocks brow.*

Emmet: What? you said. "Don't put me the f*ck down."

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