To Be Loved... (BOOK 1)

One Believer

The second I got home, I ran to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet. I fell to my knees and couldn't stop crying.

"Hyunjin, what's wrong?" Mom came rushing in and knelt down beside me.

"I messed up." I sobbed. She held me in her arms and rocked us back and forth.

"It's okay, sweetheart. Tell me what happened."

"Felix thought I was cheating on him so he broke up with me."

"Why would he think you'd cheat on him?"

"Because I didn't want to tell him who I've been hanging out with so he just assumed. I tried to tell him I'd never do that in a million years. You know how much I love him."

"I know, honey, I know."

"He said I've been an asshole lately. Why didn't anyone just tell me? And I've been hurting him and Wooyoung? Are you fucking serious? I'm sick to my stomach. I wish I realized, but I was too much of an idiot."

She sighed and grabbed some toilet paper to wipe the sweat off my forehead.

"Hyunjin, I need you to tell me who you've been with first. We all know you've been smoking and sneaking out. But I just need to know since it's so secretive. I won't be upset, I promise."

"Ryujin." I sighed. "Yeji's best friend."

"Didn't San have some sort of fling with her too?"
I nodded. "Who else?"

"Soyeon. She's best friends with Hongjoong's ex girlfriend."

"Definitely a crowd so far."

"And this freshman, Jiung. He's not a great guy, but I promise I don't do anything other than smoke."

"What does he do?"

"Literally just pills and LSD. He sells it too. But I swear on my life I've never touched that stuff. He's never even offered. But that's why I've kept Felix away from him because I know he's bad news and he has a way of manipulating the more innocent type."

"Does Felix think you're doing drugs?"

"I think so." I cried.

Everything I was telling her was the truth. I have no reason to hide anything anymore. I don't understand why Felix or Wooyoung didn't just call me out and tell me that I've been hurting them. To me, I thought I was just exploring life as a teenager and finding more confidence in myself. I've never been so wrong.

I heard the front door slam open and I just knew what was coming.

"Get up. Now." Wooyoung was in the door frame and stared at me in his mother's arms. I sighed and did as he said. He grabbed my wrist and forced me into his room. "Sit." I was terrified. I had no idea what he was about to say. He locked the door to make sure no one could even attempt at coming in.

"Wooyoung, I-"

"Shut the fuck up!" He screamed. "You have two days. Two days to find somewhere else to live. My family has been so good to you from day one. My mom has spoiled you as if you were her own son. I have been there for you since day one. Felix has taken care of you and loved you unconditionally. But clearly you don't deserve any of it." I was practically choking on my sobs as he continued. "I don't know who you are anymore, but you make me sick."

"Wooyoung, please listen to-"

He gave me a certain look that made me shut my mouth immediately.

"Don't talk to me, don't even look at me. This friendship is over. It's done with everyone actually. You fucked with the wrong people."