To Be Loved... (BOOK 1)

A Broken Heart

No, I wasn't being shady. Sure, I did think about Jisung and Minho while I was talking, but I didn't target them. They just so happen to be in a weird situation.

I'll keep this to myself. Definitely not Felix. I'm on the fence with Wooyoung only because he loves to talk and now he has San. I'm not necessarily sure how quiet he is. But this just needs to be said. What Jisung is doing to Minho is terrible and I hate watching it. Minho loves Jisung; does anything he wants, takes care of him, gave him a place to stay, and has been nothing but patient. You'd think Jisung would finally cut the shit. It would be one thing if they just wanted to be private, that's completely understandable. But to still want to hide from the rest of the world because you're afraid of what others would say is a shit excuse. He knows it too which is exactly why he's jealous of San now.

We've all repeatedly said that Wooyoung doesn't deserve to be a secret. Well you know what, same goes for Minho. All he does is take care of Jisung and Felix while no one seems to be there for him. Everyone confides in him, but he can't do the same because no one has ever made him feel safe like that. He feels like he can't be vulnerable and show that sometimes he isn't doing great.

I hope this is a wake up call for Jisung. He can be as annoyed and angry as he wants. He says he loves Minho? Maybe show it.

"Hyunjin, it's okay." Minho tried to play it off, but there was no way he could be okay with this. "I just want him to be happy."

"Yeah, but what about you?" Felix stayed quiet and laid in my lap. I know the last thing he wants is for his brother to be upset, but he doesn't know how to help because he never lets him.

"Being with Jisung makes me happy whether it's in my room or out to the world."

"Minho, what do you want?"

"Hyunjin, it's oka-"

"Min-"

"Hyunjin!" Minho had raised his voice, ultimately shutting me down. Felix immediately shot his head up and walked over to Minho, leading him out of the room. I think I've gotten too comfortable. That was out of line on my end.

Minho's POV:

Yongbok led me to the kitchen from the living room and hugged me. I knew what Hyunjin was getting at, but it's more complex than he realizes.

"Minho, why don't you talk to me about things?"

"Because I don't wanna put my problems onto anyone else. I don't need to make my stress other people's stress, that's not fair. I can handle things on my own."

"But do you at least wish you had someone to talk to?"

"It doesn't make a difference to me." I lied. It can be frustrating. Yongbok is my little brother and he's been through enough, I'm supposed to be there for him. I don't want to get into a habit of relying on him for my troubles when that's not his role. Jisung, however, sometimes doesn't know a thing that's going on in my head. I wish I could go to him for things. We've been together for almost ten months and I've never once vented about anything going on in my life because I don't feel comfortable. That's another issue out of many with our relationship.

I'm not blind or stupid. Jisung is getting toxic. I love him more than anything, but I'm getting closer to that breaking point every single day. Once I talked some sense into San, I wasn't expecting him to do what he did. But to hear it, it actually fucking sucked.

"I didn't want to do this in front of Hyunjin. But I'm coming to you as your brother, okay?" I nodded. "It'll stay between us, I promise. Are you getting fed up with Jisung? Just be honest."

"Should I be?" Yes, I am.

"If you're not, then you are the most patient person I know."

"I mean, it's a little frustrating sometimes." I shrugged.