It's when you find yourself stuck on the same page again. You thought you've moved forward, you thought you're over with the nightmares — no, you're still there. You just wrapped it all up with a smile so you can hide the despair.
There are days that I just feel so happy and I am ready to conquer the world. There are days that I'll drown in my own tears, hopeless, losing the grip for good things yet to unfold.
Perhaps, a wound unseen cannot be totally healed. It won't ache for some time so we'll think we healed but the truth is it still bleeds when triggered without a warning.
I told myself I won't entertain negative emotions. But it turns out it is sometimes necessary – to feel the sadness, embrace loneliness, and have an eye to eye with self destruction. I don't bottle up emotions anymore. I didn't like exploding and hurting people around me and myself unintentionally.
Sometimes the body will tell us that we are healed. But the mind and the heart will always remember the pain. How we get the wound is like a sculpture carved in the mind. The ache will forever echo in the heart.
The memories may be left unnoticed some days like how the moon goes unseen the moment the sun would shine. But it's still there, it never leaves. We don't only hold on to good memories, we hold on to bad ones and sad ones too.
At the end of the day, we are shaped by the wounds we get. The scars it leaves will serve as a testimony that once in our lives we became unhappy but strong and brave to get through it.
We're not stuck, the moon just appeared to remind us of the beauty in darkness. Tomorrow the sun will shine again.
Rain
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HER JOURNAL
SaggisticaIt includes real life situations and events. A glimpse of HER thoughts. Contains poems, quotes and prose. Welcome to HER world - a concoction of poetic sentiments and confessions drizzled with grayish clouds of chaos dusted with fragility and ardor.
