I think, the final blow of hurting from letting go - is feeling empty in a sunny Friday. Smiling and laughing in front of people but breaking down sitting beside loneliness while being embraced by the cold breeze and darkness.
I think, it's all part of mourning over a dying dream you thought will come true. To lose your appetite once more, to feel lost, and run out of motivation. To reminisce the past, but this time its not a cry for help nor frustration - it's the tears of feeling blue, like saying goodbye to someone - you know you'll never see anymore.
I think, acceptance is such a hard thing to do. But when you do, you'll find the freedom far away from your confused and mad system. Then, in a Saturday morning, you'll think of sitting quietly on the corner and let your soul rest, going with the flow of the river, you're not fighting back - for a minute, you let your mind ponder over good things you've been blessed with. I think, those were the perks of finally accepting something you've been denying for so long.
The battle between mind and heart, sometimes is out of control. Always failing to sit still and never walk back. Always failing to ignore something that is not supposed to be part of the track. Always getting distracted, always the hardheaded among the pack.
But, this time I tasted the bitterness of the gall - that is what you'll get when sweet words can't lure you towards hell once more. Truly, life will never stop hurting you until you learned to let go of someone or something that is not meant for you.
P.S
If you happen to read this by chance, for too long I just couldn't stay. But, know that I didn't forget, HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Rain
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HER JOURNAL
Non-FictionIt includes real life situations and events. A glimpse of HER thoughts. Contains poems, quotes and prose. Welcome to HER world - a concoction of poetic sentiments and confessions drizzled with grayish clouds of chaos dusted with fragility and ardor.
