Phan Oneshots

Soulmates and Scars

Dan's POV

"One more and... and I'll have had it." I said angrily to my laptop as tears ran down my blotchy, red, and ugly face. This hate...it's the worst I've ever seen; and it's all true. Every comment is one hundred percent accurate, no doubt.

"What an ugly-ass fag." I read after less than ten seconds of scrolling.

That was it, and I was done. I slammed my laptop down and ran into the bathroom from the lounge. Sure I only read fifteen comments, but somehow that was just enough to push me over the edge. Just enough to make me hurt myself.

I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself... I deserve it. I deserve it. I deserve it.

I locked the door behind me and quickly searched for one of my most effective escapes; my blade. I grabbed it out of the empty shampoo bottle in the back of the cabinet. There was no way in hell Phil would find it, much less take it from me.

I ran the water so I didn't stain the sink (I had made quite a few mistakes in the past, so I knew what to do), and started cutting to my heart's desire.

One slash. Two slashes. Three slashes. Four slashes. Five slashes. All on one wrist.

I kept gong until I counted a grand total of fifteen on my right arm; one for every comment. By then I had stopped, putting the blade back as blood ran down my arm and into the sink, swirling down the drain, not leaving a single stain in the clean, white sink.

I had never done anything like this before. Usually it was one or two small scrapes, but I had had it. And this was proof of how weak I was, and shows much I hated myself. Now maybe the haters will finally be happy.

Phil's POV

I peeled my eyes open slowly and looked around. It was only a second before I realized how much my arm was hurting. I looked over to it to realize there was a spot on my bed that was completely covered in blood, and the cuts on my arms had now been scabbed up.

What the hell?

Sure some nights I'll wake up with one or two scratches on my arm or wrist, but I've never seen anything like this before.

I looked around, trying to find an answer; a pair of lose scissors, a knife, or something, anything, that would make some sort of sense. But there was nothing; nothing at all in my whole room that would have hurt me like that.

I sat for a minute on my bed, wondering what to do, until I decided to just hide it for a while; it would heal eventually, and besides, I don't want Dan worrying about me. I love him too much to even try and explain things like this to him, so I guess I'll just have to keep them a secret.

Later that morning, after I dressed in a hoodie, Dan and I ate breakfast and he told me about a new video idea he liked, and we discussed it. But one thing bothered me; he was wearing a jacket. He never wears jacket inside or when we're hanging out together. I let it slide though, because maybe he just wanted to wear one to look good or something. I didn't question it.

At around two p.m. I was on Tumblr while Dan edited a new gaming channel video. I scrolled and scrolled for a while, looking at funny facts, cute cat pictures, some phan art (which I wished was real), and random facts and myths. One of them really caught my attention, and I was going to try and hint at Dan that I liked him. Maybe it would work.

"Hey, Dan." I said loudly, grabbing his attention. He dropped everything and turned to me, away from the computer at the table. "What is it?" He asked. "This thing on Tumblr says that when your soulmate gets hurt, you get their scars." I said with a smile on my face. he looked at me blankly for a second before laughing and saying., "That's such a Phil move." And going back to his computer.

I looked glumly back to my computer. Maybe he didn't catch that I liked him. Maybe he purposely doesn't like me back and is trying to tell me. Maybe he doesn't know how to feel. I thought while going back to Tumblr.

Dan's POV

What Phil said to me this afternoon really shook me. I loved him with all my heart, and I just wondered that if, just if, we were soulmates, could he have gotten those cuts from me? I mean he was wearing a jacket but...no. It cant' be real; it's just some stupid thing on Tumblr, right?

Time Laps

I woke up the next day and my stomach growled loudly. I was hungry as hell and realized I hadn't eaten since breakfast yesterday. Yeah, i was fat, and didn't deserve to eat, but I didn't care a bit that right now, my hunger pulling me from all of my thoughts.

I got out of bed in nothing but boxers and yoga pants, and made my way into the kitchen. I found an apple and munched on it, just as I heard footsteps down the hallway. It was Phil, and when he got in the room, with just a T-shirt and PJ pants, I gasped. I looked at his arm and noticed all of the cuts. Ans that's when I remembered mine.

I set the apple on the counter, pretending to be full, and hid my arm behind my back. "Dan?" Are you okay?" Phil asked me as I tried to get out of the room. "Yeah, I'm fine." I lied, and he squinted at me. "Dan, come here." He said, closing the fridge. I put my head down in shame, and threw my arm to my side. there was no escape this time.

I heard him stop breathing, and he froze, staring at my arm. "D-Dan I..." And he looked towards his own arm. On his right wrist, or forearm, just like mine, were fifteen cuts. He grabbed my arm gently, and I winced back as he took my hand in his. He held my cuts up to the sky, and kept my arm there as he pulled up his sliced arm.

They were identical.

"What the hell?" Phil said, looking form arm to arm. "D-...Dan? Do you...do you cut yourself?" Phil looked my in the eyes with puppy eyes and I dropped to my knees before I began sobbing.

"Of course I do! You haven't noticed the blade I accidentally have left out?! The blood stains in the drain that were once there?! Have you noticed nothing!?!?" I wanted to scream, but I didn't. All that came out was a whimper.

Phil dropped to the floor too, and wrapped his arms around me. "It's okay. I'm gonna heal you all better, and we'll do it together. I'll fix you." He said, his voice cracking near the end of his spiel. "No. You can't." I replied with my head in my hands. "I absolutely will. Besides, we've never even tried to fix you together, so why not start now?" He replied. I changed the subject quickly, this topic only making me bawl harder. Besides, I knew I wasn't going to be fixed anytime soon.

"Phil. the thing from Tumblr yesterday...? I asked him, hoping he would pick up what I was saying. "We-we're..." A smile broke on his face. He leaned down and smashed my lips against this, and right then and there, just like that, I was almost fixed.

A/N: Get excited guys, because my schedule changed for the definite better. Instead of every Saturday at noon, I decided Saturday and Sunday at noon. So yeah, I hope you're excited for that and if you want to be updated in case, for what ever reason, I don't write on those times (which will most likely be never) you can follow me on twitter, watisauzername (that's the last time I ever say it, I swear.)

TTFN

-Steph