As she lay there dozing next to me, a voice inside my head kept saying, Relax - you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients. But another voice inside my head kept reminding me, Howard, you are a Veterinarian!
* * *
I don't like people who take drugs - Customs officers, for example!
* * *
The man who invented cat's eyes got the idea when he saw a cat facing him on the road. If the cat had been facing the other way, he'd have invented the pencil sharpener!
* * *
I'm so unlucky that if I fell into a barrel of nipples I'd come out sucking my thumb!
* * *
Rembrandt painted 700 pictures. Of those, 3000 are still in existence!
* * *
We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the Complete Works of William Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true!
* * *
A hen is an egg's way of making another egg!
* * *
It's a good thing we have gravity, or else when birds died they'd just stay up there. Hunters would be all confused!
* * *
Remember that the most beautiful things in the world are often the most useless - Peacocks, Lilies, runway models, for example!
* * *
Opera is when a man gets stabbed in the back and instead of bleeding, he sings!
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YOU ARE READING
Adults Only Revisited
HumorDo you get offended easily? Does reading things about sex make you feel dirty? Do swear words horrify your soul? Are you so nice that you are afraid to hate ever? If so, it sux to be you! You're pathetic... Go away! Your presence is not welcome here...
