Real Estate Ads Translated
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1) Executive style living: Has a spa.
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2) Country in the city: A grotesquely overpriced large lot with a 2 bedroom house built before World War I.
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3) Prime location: Next to a factory.
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4) Newly remodeled kitchen: 50-year old cabinetry and faucets have been replaced with cheap modern equivalents.
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5) Leafy aspects: Trees block your view.
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6) Investment Opportunity: Needs a lot of money spent to fix it up.
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7) Short walk to shops: 10 minute walk to shops.
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8) Must see inside: The outside is ugly.
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9) Old World Charm: Has some woodwork. Needs cleaning.
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10) Contemporary Feeling: Has no woodwork. Needs cleaning.
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11) Developers take note: The house is falling down.
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12) Ready to remodel: The house is about to collapse; you will have to invest twice the asking price in remodel before you can move in.
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13) As new: 6 years old.
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14) Modern: 10 years old.
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15) Cottage: 25 years old.
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16) Full of character: 50 years old.
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17) Includes all the things that make a house a home: Has an indoor toilet.
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18) Will not last at this price: Will not sell at this price.
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19) Sophisticated City Living: Next to noisy bar.
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20) Handyman's delight: The roof is about to collapse.
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21) Prestige surrounds: All the other houses in the street are nicer.
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22) Inner city living at its best: Close to muggers.
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23) Efficiently designed kitchen: The kitchen is too small to fit two people at the same time.
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24) Sought after location: Frequently broken into.
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