You can't always get what you want, you can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, well, you just might find, you get what you need! – The Rolling Stones
It was another Monday afternoon with Rafael. She had wrapped up shadowing him for the day and they were walking back to the station. When they got inside, she went to her desk where she saw she had a text from Johnny asking to have the kids for Christmas.
Are you planning on the whole week or two weeks? – Jayde
I was planning on having them until New Years if that's okay with you. – Johnny
I'm at work now. I'll think about it then get back to you. – Jayde.
"Everything ok", Rafael asked her. He saw a look of anger on her face.
"Yeah. Johnny's just wanting to take the kids for Christmas".
During the day, she thought about what to do. Of course she wanted Johnny to see his kids, she just hoped to spend Christmas with them. She texted him back that he could do that then threw her phone in her purse. Never get divorced. She thought of what she had been told by numerous people. Divorce was ugly and painful. Thankfully this wasn't ugly, it was just painful.
At the break station, Fin asked if she was ok. "Yeah. Even if I get married again, I'll never get divorced again".
"What's he want?"
"He wants to take the kids until New Years but I was hoping to have them for Christmas. I want him to see them – "
"I get it. It's never easy. I've been married and divorced. I was undercover in narcotics and I couldn't be there for my family". She nodded and sighed. "Hey, it'll get better. Do you for now".
Anthony texted her to see how she was doing. Since the day was slow, she texted him back. He asked her if she wanted to see Hamilton with him. I'd love to! I've been wanting to see that! – Jayde
Great! I'll get two tickets. – Anthony
A smile came back to her face and she finished the rest of day happily. Anthony called her as she was leaving. "That would be awesome! I'm actually going to be by myself for Christmas".
"I'm sorry".
"It's not your fault. I am excited to see Hamilton. I have the soundtrack on my Spotify".
He laughed at this. Rafael came up and asked Amanda who she was talking to. "Anthony Rapp. They've been dating for awhile".
He saw how happy she was and Amanda saw it too.
Rafael thought as he got back to his office. She knew that he loved her and he still wanted her. Now she was dating someone he helped set up for her. He had done it to cheer her up after her assault and because of the fact he loved her, he wanted her to be happy. He saw her outside by herself as she was texting on her phone. Her frown had returned but when she saw Rafael, the smile came back. "Hey".
He wanted to tell her but he swallowed his feelings. "How's the kids?"
"They're good. They miss Uncle Rafi". He smiled at the nickname. "If you're not busy, want to come over on Sunday?"
"I'd love to. Are you sure you're not doing anything with Anthony?"
She looked at him and raised her eyebrows. He was jealous and she could tell. "I think you're jealous".
He pretended not to know what she was talking about. "For real", she asked.
He didn't say anything. Finally everything spilled out without him meaning to. "Ok I am jealous. I am and always will be, in love with you. I want you to be happy but know that, I'll always be waiting for you". He walked off without waiting for her reaction.
She watched him walk off in shock. Later she was at the bar with Sonny. It was just like old days before she had children or was married. They were talking and joking about every and anything. "Oh my god. Steven earlier took the cereal outside of the box and dumped it all over the floor and Kiera was on the floor eating it. So I had to throw perfectly good cereal away". Sonny laughed. "And then she decided she didn't want her diaper on, she took it off. I tried to put it back on but she screamed at me. Good lord".
Sonny laughed again. "Toddlers. Got to love them. At least at home they can run around naked".
"I've got Steven that hates wearing shirts and Kiera that hates diapers".
"Wow. I think you might be running a toddler nudist colony. So how are you and Anthony?"
"We're good. He says he's getting tickets for Hamilton. I'm excited!" She put on a smile but in her mind, she thought about what Rafael had told her.
Anthony called her when she got home and he invited her over. Once she got there, he let her in. He smiled and he took her hand. "I got you a surprise". He led her to the couch where she saw a box. He told her to open and when she did, she gasped. Inside was a necklace that was inscribed with FORGET REGRET. "I love it! Thank you!" anthony helped her put it on.
"You said that yours got lost in your attack", he looked at her wearing the necklace. "You look so beautiful". He bent down and kissed her. She pulled herself closer to him.
Her hands went to his belt loops and he put one hand behind her neck and the other on her hip. He wanted her and he stopped kissing her and moved his lips to her neck. She smiled as her hand went through his hair. He stopped and asked for permission to continue. Once he got it, they went to his bed. He laid her down then got up to take his shirt off. He got back on top and started kissing her neck as her hand removed his pants and boxers. He moved his hands to her pants and took them off with her underwear. He then removed her shirt and her undershirt.
Once he was back on top, he opened her legs then came between them. He started moving in and out as she moaned softly. He kissed her he continued moving. His hands massaged her area making her wet. She moaned and arched her back. She could feel him inside her and he groaned as he thrusted faster inside her. She threw her head back on to the pillows as her fingers dug into his back. She wrapped her legs around his waist. He grabbed the headboard as he released himself inside her.
He pulled out of her then laid beside her. He looked at her and he brushed some of her hair off her face. She had turned towards him and her hand went through his dirty blond hair. He kissed her. They laid there with only a sheet to cover them. She rested her head on his chest.
