Hey, it's Anthony. I just wanted to know if you were busy later. I really want to talk to you. I realize I made a mistake letting you go. I love you and I was too stupid to realize it. I didn't realize it until you walked out the door. I know you have a new boyfriend, I just thought you should know. Please let me know – Anthony
Hey. I don't know what to say. You'll always be in my heart and I'm happy for everything we did together. I need time to think about this. I don't want you to think I'm leading you on or anything. – Jayde
Anthony saw this and sighed. She was the best thing to happen to him and then he let her go. He replayed every moment in his head as he realized that he was too late. Why do guys have to be so complicated, she thought. Rafael had been there since the beginning, even when she was in the hospital and in a coma. Then she dated Anthony 6 months before they broke up. He had told her that he wasn't ready for a readymade family.
I get it. Thanks for thinking of me. Just remember that I will always be there for you, no matter what. – Anthony
Jayde turned off her phone and tried to focus on her work. Olivia came out and sent her and Sonny to question a witness. Jayde followed him and when they got outside, he looked back at her. "You ok?"
"Why wouldn't I be?"
He shrugged. "Usually your picking on me or something".
"Boy drama, Sonny. I didn't think you'd be interested".
They walked out to his car and got in. "You forgot that I grew up with three sisters".
This made her smile. "You seriously want to know?" He looked at her. "So you know about me and Rafael?"
He nodded. "It's kind of obvious".
"Before we started dating him, I was dating Anthony Rapp for 6 months but we broke up because he decided he didn't want a readymade family. Now he wants me back but I would never hurt Rafael".
Sonny shook his head as he drove. "Wow. Well I guess he missed his chance. He didn't know what he had. Like Johnny, he didn't know what he had. If I was them, I would keep you forever". He waited for her reaction and he thought of what he had just said.
That night after putting the kids to bed, she was laying on her bed with Rafael. He turned so he was on his side and he brushed some of her hair off her face. "I think Sonny told me he has a crush on me".
Rafael laughed. "Who wouldn't have a crush on you? I'm sure you have guys lining up for you". She turned to her back. "That's the problem. I only want you. Not ex boyfriends or best friends".
"Are you talking about Anthony?"
She nodded. "He left me a message on my Tumblr. I told him that I had to think. I'm not good at letting people down".
He smiled. "I know. I've noticed. You never seem to want to hurt anyone but it seems like you're the one who gets hurt". She turned back to look at him. "Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself and sometimes that means hurting some people".
She thought about this. "I know. I turned you down who knows how many times and now –"
"Cariño, I knew you were being faithful to Johnny. That's another reason I fell in love with you. You're committed, head strong, stubborn, you don't give up. When you were in the hospital, you never let the doctors tell you you wouldn't be able to do something. They said you would never wake up, that you would be brain damaged, you would never be able to walk. You proved everyone wrong. When you walked back into the precinct, day after day, I didn't know how you did it. I only saw you break down once. You are the strongest woman I've ever met".
She thought about what he said. He leaned over and kissed her then laid back down with her head on his shoulder.
The next day, he was at his desk and he thought about what had happened the previous night. He loved her and he meant everything he said. He knew that at one time, she had a list that her now ex-husband had made her. He decided to make his own list:
My Cariño
Is beautiful inside and out
Never wants to hurt anyone
Is the strongest woman I've met
Faithful to those she loves
Never gives up
Committed
Head strong
Stubborn
Can make me laugh with her sarcasm
Proves everyone wrong
Is a wonderful mommy
A great friend
Loves musical theater
Always has a smile
Has a huge heart
Loves with everything she has
Doesn't let anyone tell her she can't do something
Has the craziest laugh
Loves people for who they are
- Rafael Barba
He emailed the list to her. When Jayde saw she got an email from Rafael, she opened it. Tears came to her eyes as she read it. Amanda saw her crying and came over to see what was going on. Jayde wiped her eyes as she showed her. "Wow. You going to print that out?"
"Yeah!" She hit print then went to the printer. Once it came out, she hung it up at her desk where she and everyone could see it.
