5 Seconds Of Summer Imagines

Luke Imagine - Part 2

An entire week had dragged by since the accident. Since the day I found out I was going to be a single dad, not having my partner in crime there to help me raise our daughter. When I was finally pulled away from the hospital, after receiving the news, my parents took me home and decided on looking after Amelia for a few days for me, so that I could grieve without having the stress of caring for a 2 year old. When I arrived home, I lashed out, the angry side of grief taking over me. I smashed plates, threw picture frames, shattered glasses until it tired me out and when I felt beyond exhausted, I sunk to the ground, amongst all the debris, brought my knees to my chest and cried out in pain for being alone.

I fell asleep in that position, curled up on the floor with shards of glass littering the floor around me. Not wanting to clean up, I gathered myself up off of the floor and climbed the stairs to my room. Our room. The place where I will now be sleeping alone for the rest of my life. No one there to warm the other half of the bed, no one to hold during the middle of the night, no one to wake up next to and admire their beauty.

With dried tear stains on my face, I felt them getting wet from the fresh tears falling from my reddened eyes as I looked around our room from the door way. The bed was perfectly made, no creases in the linen. Her make-up was all gathered neatly together on the dressing table, along with her hairbrush and perfumes. I walked across to the table, picking up a bottle of Chanel and sprayed a small amount into the air in front of me, the smell invading my senses. This made my tears fall harder, a sob escaping my mouth. Using my t shirt, I wiped my face, ridding it of tears before pulling it over my head, removing my jeans leaving me in just my boxers. I slowly trudged over to the bed, pushing away the duvet and crawled under the covers, laying my head on the pillow and inhaling deeply. Closing my eyes, I felt sleep take over me, as I laid there on her side of the bed.

-1 Week Later-

I have no idea how long it's been since I lost Y/N. It feels like a lifetime, when it's probably only been a few days. My routine was very basic. I woke at random times of the day, never knowing the difference between day and night, or Tuesday and Thursday, and I would lay in our bed, on her side and stare at the ceiling, just thinking about our life together. Our first date, when we met each other's families and friends, the day I asked her to marry me, our wedding, when we found out we were expecting our first child together and the day that angel was born. Now I no longer get to make any more of these special memories with her and have to start creating some of my own, something I know I wouldn't be ready for a long time and whenever I came to that point in my thought process, I would turn in the covers and fall back to sleep, with tears leaking from the corners of my eyes, until the next time I would wake up and have to repeat the cycle again.

My eyes snapped open upon hearing a loud shout coming from downstairs, I rubbed my eyes furiously and slowly climbed from the bed, still only wearing boxers. Even though I was startled from the sound, I knew it wasn't an intruder and nothing to be alarmed about but due to not expecting visitors, or better yet, not wanting them, I was slightly on edge. Deciding I wasn't fit enough for company, I made the better decision of climbing back into the warmth of the bed and pulled the covers over my head to dull out the sound of people in my house, falling back into a light sleep, where the sounds downstairs was replaced with laughter from the woman that should be laying with me.

I was awoken yet again, this time from someone shaking me and pulling the covers back down over my head. Blinking away the sunlight that was in the room from the newly opened curtains, I fisted at my eyes, willing them to open up so I could see who was stood with me. A light gasp escaped the lips of the person who woke me, a small sob following and I felt the weight of the bed shift as someone sat down and began stroking my hair, as if I was a small child who'd just woken from a terrible nightmare. If only that was the case for this moment in time.

"Luke, sweetheart, what happened?" My mum asked me in a soft voice, almost like she didn't want to disturb the silence I had been revelling in the last few days.

"Y/N died, you was there, why do you need an explanation?" My words coming out slow and low, due to not having spoken for a few days, apart from the odd yell or scream in frustration and grief.

"I know that, I didn't meant that though. I meant with the house, with downstairs." She faltered in her words and I waited for her to finish her sentence, knowing full well she wasn't finished yet, which she wasn't "With you."

"I'm fine. I just want to be left alone. Is that too much to ask?" The words coming out through gritted teeth, strained and angry. I just wanted to be alone, so I can close my eyes and dream. After all, you only dream when reality fails you.

"Well, I'm sorry Luke but that won't be happening. You've had a week now, and I know it's not much and I don't expect you to be over her death already, but you have Amelia. Your little girl. Who keeps asking where mummy and daddy are and I can't give her a straight answer. I can't tell her that her mother's dead and her father wants to be left alone to take his anger and frustrations out on anything he can get his hands on. I don't want you to fail her, Luke." Her loud and angry words are sinking into my skin. Each syllable being more powerful than the last. "Y/N would want you to be a good dad."

At this, I can feel my heart break even more than it already had in this past week. Sobs escape my mouth and my body begins to shake with sorrow. Tears that I thought were not possible to be there, made their way down my cheeks and I struggled to maintain my breathing. My mother rushed to my side, hushing me and trying to calm me down by stroking my hair again. The sobs had subsided, the tears still slowly leaving my eyes, but I had relatively calmed down from 5 minutes previous.

"I thought it best to take another thing of off your plate Luke, I planned her funeral. I thought it was best seeing as you're clearly not in a good state of mind right now to cope with that amongst everything else." Her words back to a soothing nature. She continued talking but all I could think about was a funeral for her. Everyone dressed in black as we stood there and watched her body be lowered into a ground in a wooden box. Then that would be it, she really would be gone and there would be nothing I could do about it. "So, I'll get you a suit and drop it off the day before if you would like? Also, the subject of Amelia on the day?" My mum's words broke me from my reverie.

"What about Amelia?" I asked beyond confusion at this point, finally tearing my eyes from the wall and turning to look at my mum.

"Well, do you think it's a good idea for her to come or if it would be better staying with a sitter? It's entirely your call, you know what's best for her." My mum smiles sympathetically at me and I slowly nod my head whilst taking a deep breath.

"I think it's a good idea for her to say goodbye. I know she's young but I want her to understand it all from a young age so that it won't be as difficult to inform her later in life." She nods at my words, seeming to agree with me.

"OK then. Now that that's sorted," She says whilst standing up from the bed, smiling at me she adds "I'll go make you something to eat, you need to take a shower. Then you are going to clean this house, from top to bottom. Y/N would despise seeing it in this state and she would be furious at you. Then you are going to come over to my place and pick up Amelia, she misses her dad and wants answers, Luke. And I know it's going to be difficult but you're going to have to do it son."

I nod reluctantly, not looking forward to the conversation with my 2 year old, regarding why her mummy is with the angels now instead of us.

"When did you say the funeral was?" I look at the bedding at this point, knowing that if I saw my mum tell me, I would end up crying all over again. Something I'm not necessarily proud of.

"Tuesday. 2 o'clock. I'll get Amelia something to wear also." With that she walked to the door, leaving me once again, alone in my room. 3 days. I have 3 days until I have to bury my wife, with my daughter in my arms.