19 Days - One Shots

A Better Life - Part One

Trigger Warning - if you are sensitive to death, overdosing or suicide then I beg of you to not read this. Please and thank you.

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One Day

Mo Guan Shan stared at the two small pills in his hand with uncertainty before looking up at his mother. "Just two of these a night?"

She nodded hesitantly, glancing at the pills with the same look. "That's what the doctor said. If you take these every night, it should settle you back into your sleeping schedule."

Guan Shan sighed heavily and popped the pills in his mouth and taking a sip of water. Almost instantly, a metallic taste filled his mouth and he visibly cringed. "It's take a while for it to kick in." He told his mother who was staring at him expectantly, as if waiting for something to happen instantly.

She nodded. "Hopefully this'll help with the nightmares too. I can't have my poor baby afraid to sleep because of nightmares. It's awful to see you like this." She rubbed his arm and stood up from the couch. "I'm going to make you some hot tea so go get ready for bed."

As Guan Shan settled himself into bed, he was already feeling drowsy. His eyes kept closing and his pillow seemed to be more comfortable than he remembered. He decided to close his eyes whilst he waited for the tea but they jerked open when he heard footsteps walking his way.

What he saw was not his mother but a stranger. Instead of being in bed, Guan Shan was now standing in the middle of a large room that appeared to be a ballroom. Guan Shan looked around in confusion wondering how he had gotten here. He found himself to be wearing a black suit.

Looking around, he found the room was empty except for a large grand piano stood in the corner. The floor to ceiling windows ran the length of the ballroom and had long, golden velvet curtains blocking the light from entering. Soft music was playing in the background as the stranger approached him. He, too, was wearing a black suit. His black hair was pushed slightly to the side and he walked with a confidence Guan Shan hadn't seen before. It was like the stranger knew him, expected him, was waiting for him.

The stranger stopped a little ways away and bowed slightly. "Ah, you're finally here. Welcome." He lifted the corner of his mouth.

The redhead looked at him in bewilderment. "Finally? Where the fuck even is 'here'? I was at home a moment ago."

"This, my dear sweet redhead, is your mind palace. You're dreaming. Those sleeping pills knocked you right out. They tend to when you're not really used to them. Welcome to your subconscious."

"So why the hell are we in a ballroom? And who the hell are you?"

The stranger took a step closer. "I'm whoever you want me to be. And a ballroom? The mind wants what the mind wants, Guan Shan. We don't make the rules, it's just that way. Since I'm in your head, you get to decide a name for me." Guan Shan took a moment to think before he spoke.

"He Tian." They both spoke at the same time and Guan Shan stared in shocked confusion whilst the other grinned.

"I told you I'm in you're head so I know what you're thinking about at all times. Cool right?"

"More like creepy." He retorted.

He Tian laughed and walked the rest of the way to Guan Shan and held out his hand. "Come, let's dance."

Before Guan Shan could refuse, He Tian grabbed his hand and pulled him flat against his body. He Tian grasped Guan Shan's hand in one of his own and slid the other down his waist and rested it on the small of his back. Guan Shan flushed at the close contact. For someone that's in my head, he sure feels real.

The music grew louder and the couple danced for what seemed like hours. He Tian watched him closely and teased Guan Shan every now and then for going red. After dancing, they decided to take a walk. He Tian pulled one of the golden curtains aside and opened the door. He gestured for Guan Shan to go first.

Outside it was dark, the stars twinkling in the sky. Guan Shan looked around and found a wide garden before them with stone paths twisting off into different directions and high hedges in the background cornered off the garden. Guan Shan leaned on the stone railing and stared at the sky. "The stars don't shine like this in China."

"Yes, it beautiful." Guan Shan looked at He Tian after his words but found he wasn't looking at the sky but instead at the ginger before him.

Guan Shan turned away quickly and cleared his throat. "So, are you real? They say you never dream of a face you haven't seen before, so do I know you?"

"Yes. No. Maybe? Unfortunately I don't have the answer you want, my little red ball of fluff. You'll just have to figure it out on your own."

Guan Shan glanced at He Tian out the corner of his eye and frowned. "You're helpful." Sarcasm laced his voice.

He Tian reached forward and grabbed Guan Shan's hand. "I'm always more than willing to be helpful when it comes to you, Mo Guan Shan." He pulled Guan Shan's hand forward and kissed the top of it.

Guan Shan blinked and suddenly he was back in his own bed. With a gasp he sat up and looked around his room. The stranger was nowhere to be seen. He looked down and found he was in his pyjamas and not a suit. Was it all really a dream? It felt so real. He looked on his bedside table and found the small bottle filled with pills before turning away and getting out of bed. He still felt groggy and half asleep, assuming the pills still had yet to wear off. Staggering into the living area, he rubbed his eye and joined his mother on the sofa.

"Hey sweetie! How did you sleep? By the time I came in with your tea, you were already fast asleep. Those pills must've hit you hard."

"Yeah, I don't remember much." Silence rang between them for a moment before Guan Shan looked at her hesitantly. "Hey, Ma? Did I, go anywhere last night? Or did someone come round at all?"

Confusion filled her features and she shook her head. "No. You were as quiet as a mouse sleeping away last night. I came to check on you a few times. Why?"

He shook his head, dismissing the thought. "Nothing, I just had a weird dream last night."

She looked concerned. "Was it a nightmare again? Are the pills not going to work?"

"No, no. It wasn't a nightmare. Just a weird dream that's all. Anyways I gotta get ready for school."

When Guan Shan reached the school gates, his eyes darted around at all the faces he could see. He was sure he would find He Tian somewhere around the school. You don't dream about a face you've never seen before. It's just not possible. Especially a face that good looking.

No matter how hard Guan Shan looked, he just couldn't seem to find anyone who even closely resembled He Tian. When school ended, he made the decision to go back and see He Tian and interrogate him some more. Surely, he had some answers to the millions of questions Guan Shan had about the situation.

He would get his answers and he would get them tonight.

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Never before have I written about my sleeping problems before, but I've been thinking about this for a long time and finally decided to do it.

I ask that you're all careful if you take any sort of pills and, if you are struggling, to seek professional help.

I love you all, stay safe.