Lovesong

Chapter 47

I stood there in shock after I hung up with Gyu. I could  not believe I did all that I did only to find out my Kit Kate was still in Korea. Oh my god! I kissed her thinking she'd be a million miles away. I wanted to give her something to remember me by. In a way I feel like a fool. It was a foolish thing to do. A careless mistake. And Tae kind of forced it out of me. I wish I'd never opened up to him about my feelings for Kate. But I think she kind of had an idea. I was always flirty towards her. The role I play for MOA's is flirty. I'm always winking or sending out finger hearts. But with Kate it came naturally. Now I feel like I was played by my two best friends. She knew all along. And when I talked about California and her going there, she just nodded and went along with it, letting me believe every word. That's not like Kate, and Gyu as well. I can understand he was only trying to protect her, but I'm his best friend, and he should've been able to trust me. However, I can also see why he didn't put his faith in me. I've stepped on his toes when it comes to Kate.  Secretly texting her. Sending her pictures of me. Sneaking around asking her to record a song with me. I was drawn to her light and her love for music. I was flattered when she said yes. When Gyu explained to me about keeping Kate's whereabouts a secret, I agreed. At least I knew she was safe and at home, her home, in Daegu. I can breathe a little easier, but my thing is....How are Gyu and I going to keep this secret from Soobin? He doesn't want Soobin to find out, but Soobin is a mastermind on everything. He scrutinizes every detail. Like Kate, I'm afraid he figure it all out, and hellfire will rise again. He has something out for her, and Gyu keeps getting in the way. He's really not out to hurt her, but to love her. We all want to. Soobin just has a different way of showing it, and that's where we need to get to the bottom of it. He needs to fully understand that he can't love Kate the way he wants to. She's Gyu's fiancée. She's always been Gyu's girl ever since we were teenagers. Sometimes I know that's a bitter pill to swallow, especially when all of us are enamored with her. Soobin seems to having a hard time separating the two. He wants to live hos fantasy through Kate and with Kate. Then don't we all? We all want that little of piece of heaven she offers with her smile and the light in her eyes. Bless Gyu for getting to be the lucky guy. My best friend. I'll somehow find a way keep Soobin intact here until Gyu returns. I'll deal the punches and pushes if I have to. He already thinks I'm up to something. The video shoot was moved to today, and now I have to tell Soobin that's Gyu's stay with his family has been extended to a few more days. This is not going to go over well. I really dreaded having to face Soobin alone. I still have the bruises on my ribs from taking a beating for Gyu yesterday. I never cried myself to sleep until last night. And I couldn't bare to tell Gyu about it. I've never experienced a blow to the body. I'm used to being belittled by vicious words. It's just the way my life has always been...until Gyu and Kate. And I thought by becoming a member of TXT, having Gyu by my side for moral support, all that would change. Or so I thought. Yes, we all joke around and say things we don't mean, but all in all, we are still brothers, living under one roof. We've had to get used to all of each other's quirks and irritating habits. We laugh together. We cry together. We fight together. We do everything that brother's do. I've never been someone's personal punching bag, but I'd take a hit for Gyu if it meant keeping Kate safe. I've never been a fighter, but I'd fight for her. Not everyone knows it. Only my sisters, and now Gyu. That's what best friends are for. We are like the 3 musketeers. All for one. One for all. We've always been and will be there for one another. I lift my shirt and examine the bruises in the mirrored wall. It wasn't a pleasant sight. I ran the tips of my fingers over my ribs and abdomen. The blue and purple marks brought tears to my eyes. It was tender to the touch, and it was excruciating to breathe. Never before did I think Soobin would hurt me. With that being said, if he'd raise a fist to a woman, he'd raise it to anyone. I just hope in time Kit Kate will appreciate me more, and realize what all I personally endured for her and for my best friend. I'm not saying she won't. She's always come to my defense, and Gyu as well. But nothing like this has ever happened. A solitary tear slid from my right eye, and I knew I was in for another beating once I tell Soobin the news. Was I ready? Could I brace myself for the blow? I was still standing there observing the bruises when the studio door opened, and Junnie stuck is head in. He said, "Kai, are you..." I quickly dropped my shirt to hide the marks Soobin had left behind. He opened the door wider and stepped inside, "I was going out to get ramen, and wanted to know if you wanted to tag along." He closed the door. I hugged my midriff after wiping away a tear, "Thanks, but I'd rather not." He asked coming towards me, "Makenae, are you all right?" I hissed, turning away, "I'm fine." Damn it hurt to talk. He laid a hand on my shoulder, "What are you hiding, Kai? Did I see bruises?" I grimaced, glancing over my shoulder at him, "I don't know what you're talking about." I know Junnie he wasn't going to give up, and I wasn't for sure I could hide the pain much longer. I nodded, "Ok. I don't know if I'll be able to dance in the video shoot today." He questioned, "Kai, what do mean?" I added sadly, "And Gyu's still in Daegu with his family." He chided raking a hand through his hair, "So we're having to postpone it another day? Our manager isn't going to be pleased." I knew that much, but I very well could not tell him that Gyu is with Kate. That Kate is the reason he went to Daegu. If he knew, he would not be standing here. He'd be making a beeline for her, and drag Gyu back here by the hairs on his head. I tugged the tail of my shirt up just enough for him to see, "And Junnie..." His dark eyes widened and he fell back a step gasping, "Holy shit, Kai! Who the fuck did that to you? I'll have his ass." Could I tell him? Should I? I closed my eyes and lowered my shirt, "I'll be all right. I just wanted you to know. I know how hard we've practiced for this video, and I go get myself all battered and bruised." His eyes narrowed turning concerned, "Dude, you're  not one to pick a fight. And you rarely leave the house. Who did this?" I pulled out the rolling chair from the keyboard and sat down, my eyes falling to the floor, "I'm not at liberty to say." Junnie squatted in front of me, "Not at liberty? Fuck that, Kai. You could have some internal damage. Who's the monster that did this?" He swallowed. Monster? He asked softly, "Kai, did Soob's do this? And what would possess him to do so?" I pulled the hood of my hoodie over my head, trying to hideaway within my shell. It was obvious to Junnie that Soobin would've been the only one to attack me and I knew his next question would be "why"? He'd already asked me what would possess him to do so, and I can't tell him it's because of Gyu. Gyu not being here brought out Soobin to lash into me. Then I admitted to Junnie, peeking out from the edge of my hood, "Yes. Soob's did this. He thinks I know everything about where Gyu went and whatever, but really I'm just in the dark as you guys are. All I know is he went to see his brother who'd taken ill. That's it." Junnie motioned to my chest, "And that riled Soob's up to beat the stew out of you? That's insane, Kai. I'm sorry he did this to you. You don't have to put up with this shit. Fight back. Show him you're boss. Stand your ground. You can't let him push you around." That was easy for him to say. I've never had much of a confrontation with anyone...until now. I'm a laid back, pretty much an easy going human being. I'm the people watcher of the group. I watch and observe when I need to. Other than that I'm a loner and stay secluded to myself. I commented wincing, "I'm not you, Junnie. I'm not Tae or Gyu. I don't throw a punch just because I'm angry. And I don't fight over a girl." Junnie rose to his feet and pulled the rolling stool over in front of me. He sat down, interlocking his hands together between his parted thighs. He smirked, "And there it is. Kai Huening, this is all about Kate." I shook my head, lying, "No. Why would I put myself in danger?" Technically it was. I was doing for her. Taking a beating for Gyu only to protect Kate. His smile broadened, "Because like me, you care more for her than you're willing to show. And I think Soob's sees that. And he's making a point that no one will stand in his way. But that still does not give him the right to do this to you. You have every reason to feel something for her. You and Gyu and have been close to her for so long." I nodded, hiding back inside my hoodie, " Yes, someone has to defend her and protect her while she's away." Then I realized maybe I just said too much.
I suddenly felt Junnie's icy stare on me. I know he feels like that's his job. He's always comes to her defense, and I'm beginning to see that with Tae too. Tae saves her from the hands of Soobin, and Junnie tries to save her from everyone else. I know he's still hung up on her, and honestly I think he always will be. She was pretty special to him, and I can't help but to notice the way he looked at her, and the way his eyes light at the very thought of her. He choked on his words, "Defend her? Protect her? Kai, she's way out on the west coast. You getting beat up with her not even being around....is such a dumb ass move. What's really go on here? And why is Soob's even approaching you about Gyu's or Kate's whereabouts?" I shrugged, "I wish I knew. I may their best friend, but I don't know everything. They've never been one to tell. I told Soob that as far as I know of Kate is in California, and Gyu is in Daegu. Then he mumbled something about Mari and the Gypsy." Junnie looked at me in shock, "What the...I thought he wasn't having anything to do with her? And what is she doing in my parent's club?" There again I shrugged my shoulders, "Maybe Mari's been in contact with him for some reason. I don't know. I just know I'm on the receiving end of all this." Junnie grinaced, "And that's far to you." I tried to pull my hood further over my head, "It doesn't matter anyway. Soobs is going to take it out on someone, and since Gyu's not here, it might as well be me." He laid a hand on my knee, "Kai, that's absurd. Something or someone is the driving force...and I have a gut feeling that force is Mari. She knows more than she's willing to share with Soobs. Are you for sure he said something about the Gypsy?" I groaned inside my hoodie. Oh god. I can't tell Junnie. He'll put two and two together. Gyu would hate me and never trusts me again if I do. Do I open that can or continue to let Soobin use me as his punching bag? I closed my eyes, and said into my hands, "I don't know for sure. I could have misheard him. All I know is he was screaming at me while he kicked me and punched me." Junnie wrapped his arms around me and apologized once more, "I'll deal with Soobs, buddy. You just focus on healing." Could I do that knowing what laid ahead? I had to approach Soobin and let him know that Gyu would not be back anytime soon. And I'm sure I'll either get punched in the face or in the gut. Just enough to drop me to my knees, ready for a blow from his foot. And if I don't give him the answer he wants to hear, he'll repeat the process. When this happened yesterday after Gyu's leaving, I knew exactly how Kate felt, or how Gyu felt when Soobin hit him. As I sit here talking to Junnie my ribs and stomach are throbbing, aching, and I really need to lay down. I've never been in such excruciating pain in all my life. I'm beginning to wonder if maybe Soobin did do some internal damage, or did he simply crush my spirit and bruise my soft soul? Junnie must've noticed the pain on my face when he pulled back. He asked, "Dude, you all right?" I nodded tearfully, "I just need to go lie down, and take some medicine." I slowly stood up, "Junnie, if you happen to talk to Gyu, don't mention this, ok?" He looked at me confused, "Kai, I believe Gyu should know that you're putting yourself at risk for him and Kate..,though I still don't understand where she fits in here, but if that's what you want I won't say anything." I nodded, "Thank you." But it came out as a hissing sound. I shuffled out of the room, still buried in my hoodie. In case Soobin saw me I didn't want him to see he broke me. He'd only end up teasing and poking fun at me, calling me names that cut to the core of my ego. I just about to walk into my room when he spotted me passing his. He called out, "Yo, blondie!" I stopped in my tracks and moaned, "I don't have anymore news." It was then I felt him grab the back of my hoodie, and slam me up against the wall as he twisted my right arm around my back. He growled close to my ear, "I know where she is...and I think you do too."