Lovesong

Chapter 61

After our talk and dinner Kate and I decided to dive into the song that she'd been working on. I asked about it to kind of get the tone of the music, and when she told me it was a ballad, I cringed a little. Not that it was bad, but simply because I was secretly a sucker for love songs. We moved into the control room and I took a seat in one of the rolling chairs, and she filled one beside me. Quickly vanilla filled my senses. I smirked, "So what song is it that your manager is giving you fits over?" She huffed folding her arms over her chest, "Please Remember." I wracked my brain to recall the song. I asked turning my chair to look at her, "Have you performed it before? Have I heard it? It doesn't sound familiar." She shook her head, "No, you haven't. I've sang the words to you." That's when I remembered. The drive back to Seoul. Her in the passenger seat of my truck. Not that song. I replied sadly, "Shortcake, not that goodbye, gut wrenching, soul ripping song you wrote for Gyu?" She moaned, "I know, right? Out of all my songs, they picked that one for me to release first. I don't know if it's the melody or my voice that needs changing. They just said it needed a little more oomph." How much more "oomph" were they looking for? Do they guys not know they are dealing with a perfectionist here? I advised, "Ok, let's do this. Is this the music?" I pointed to the control board. Kate nodded, "Yes." I asked, "Do you have the music sheets?" She rose to her feet, and walked over towards the enclosed soundproof room, and came back, handing me the papers. I took one look at them, making heads or tails out of the notes. She said leaning her lower back against the control board, "Tae, thank you for helping me with this. I  appreciate your honesty. You really didn't have to go out of your way. I just know that you're that good in whatever you do." I winked at her, "Nonsense, shortcake. I wanted to do I could spend some time with you. Well, from what I can tell on here, everything seems pretty precise. Let me play the back the music first. Then we'll adjust accordingly." Kate stepped aside and let me take control. The music was perfect. I wouldn't change a thing, so it must be in the way she's singing it. I rolled another playback with her voice to the music. My heart drummed against my chest. Her voice alone could make angels cry. Then I heard it. I rewound it back, and played it again. It was in the chorus. Kate she'd frantic, "Tae, what's wrong?" I repeated my step, and made some notes on the music sheet. I handed her the music sheets, "Ok, beautiful. Let's try this. You go into the room, put the headphones on. I'll roll the music from the top, and you sing the chorus in those notes. They want oomph. We are going to give them a freaking power ballad."

Kate sang right on cue and it was perfect. No. It was more than perfect. I honestly didn't see anything wrong with the version she had then she moved into the chorus:
'Please remember
Please remember
When I was there for you
And you were there for me
Please remember
Our time together
When time was yours and mine
And we were wild and free
Please remember please remember me'

It literally gave me chills. No other female artist has ever moved me like this. Maybe I just never noticed it until now. Her eyes were focused dead on me through the glass. I was on fire. Her left hand rested on the headphone over her ear, and she swayed to the music. I needed to cut the music, but we were recording. How can one possibly shivering yet but burning up on the inside. I was not expecting this. Was it wrong of me to help my friend out? I started to think of Gyu, of Junnie, of Soobin, and of Kai. Kai would be so disappointed for missing his chance like this. If these guys that she was breathtaking performing, they clearly don't know what they're missing behind the scenes. Once she got towards the end of the song, tears were in her eyes and fell as she sang:
'And how we laughed
And how we smiled
And how this world was yours and mine
And how no dream was out of reach
I stood by you, you stood by me
We took each day and made it shine
We wrote our names across the sky
We ran so fast we ran so free
And I had you and you had me
Please remember'

Even I had tears in my eyes. And I knew she was thinking of Gyu. He'd be so proud of her. I know I am, and she's not even mine. Damn it! Why did I have to go and open up my heart to her? I should've just kept everything tucked away for safe keeping. It's not right for me to feel these things. As soon as she walked out of the recording room, drying her eyes, I knew I was doomed. This song was too much too. How can one person write something so heartbreaking? There's nothing more powerful than love and...goodbye. Dear god! What would have happened if I hadn't gone back to get her that day? I searched around for a tissue, but didn't see any. Kate semi-laughed, "Tae, I'm fine." I turned to wipe away a tear that was determined to fall, "I wish I could say the same. Damn, woman. You really know how to get to the heart of it." I felt her hand on my back. She asked, "Are you saying it's good?" I glanced over my shoulder at her. Oh damn! She's in my face. Tears in her eyes. Damp cheeks. Beautiful. I turned to face her and took her face into my hands drying her eyes, "Shortcake, it's better than good. It's going to blow them out of the water. And if not, then something is wrong with them." My eyes were all over her face. She smiled, "Thank you, Tae. For everything. I don't know what I would have done without you." I turned cocky, my hands falling away, "Well...." She turned to the control board, "Can we hear the playback?" It is her song, and I had no problem with it. Go ahead and rip my heart out of my chest again, sweetheart. It's just an organ. It's one of those songs that will leave you breathless. In tears. And wondering if goodbye was really the answer. I sat down in the rolling chair just so I could have something to brace myself and rewound the tape. Kate filled the seat next to me. The room filled with silence as the song played. When it ended, Kate turned to me, clasping her hands to her chest, "Tae, it's perfect. Thank you." Her eyes danced with so much appreciation. I shrugged, "It's the least I could do. But you don't have to thank me. You know I enjoy this." I reached out a hand and caressed her cheek. Why did I not have any control when it came to touching her? She's just so damn irresistible. I can see all the reasons why Soobin loved having his hands on her. And I needed to have more control of myself, and hide my feelings towards her. I don't want to hurt Gyu. He's been affected so much by the others coming forward, and even though I know she's married now, I can already see that's not going to stop the others either. I need to be strong and resist the temptation staring me in the face. I had no idea what I was even thinking. The last time we were alone like this was at the Gypsy, the day I came to warn her not to give in to Soobin. I still remember the things I told her, and the way she looked. And knowing now that she's here, and not a million miles away is going to be hard on all of us. In a way I'm glad to know that she's home. This is where she needs to be, and I'm sure Gyu is thrilled to have her close by. And apparently so since he married her. In the back of my mind, I'm not sure what was the rush. Wasn't he still waiting on the signed divorce papers from Mari? When Gyu gets his mind set on something, he'll pursue it until it's completed. As I'm sitting here with her now, I am thinking of a song I was singing not too long ago when I think of her. It's the things I've always wanted to say to her. But I didn't want to frighten her. It seems I'm frightening myself more. Kate must have noticed my distance. She reached out a hand and touched mine. Dear god the electricity! I've heard of Junnie talk about it the zings and the zapping in her touch. And how it awakens the soul. I recall that day at the Gypsy. I felt it then too. I adjust my position in the chair, my eyes meeting hers. Those green orbs are so mesmerizing. I can see how easily it is to fall. Gyu is so lucky to spend a lifetime looking into them. Bless him for finding her. She asked, "Tae, you all right?" I was more than all right. I was tripping over my own heartbeat. The tip of my tongue licked my dry bottom lip, "Sure, shortcake. Just trying to be good." Her eyes widened in surprise, and she rested her elbow on the control board with her chin in her left hand. She winked at me, "Wow, Tae. I never pictured you to be bad." The words that fell from her sultry lips caused my libido to jump behind the fly of my jeans. And fuck that naughty wink. She was literally flirting with me. I know it's her nature...just like Gyu, but that can lead to some serious trouble. I took the liberty upon myself and scooted my chair in closer to her. So close I was inches from her lips. "Kate, I'm trying here. Really trying not to step over my bounds, but you're making it very hard." She nibbled on her lower lip. I thought to myself, 'Please don't do that. Don't you realize how weak that makes us?' I raised my hand and placed my thumb under her bottom lip, "Beautiful, you need to break that dirty habit." I tugged her lip free. I started thinking how kissable those strawberry lips might just be. I'm so close. Her breath is on my face. Dear god! I'm losing it here. If I don't leave now, I might regret my next move. I whispered softly, "I have to go." She nodded, "Ok. Thank you again. I don't know what you did, but I appreciate it." The fingers of her right hand curled around my wrist. I swallowed hard, "It was my pleasure, shortcake. It's been fun. Let's do it again soon." I thought to myself, 'Pleasure. Do it again. I am so helpless. I'm helpless around her. But I can't tell her that. I can't tell that I'm falling helplessly in love with her.' I have to keep a level head. My thoughts straight. I can't lost in the vision of her. No matter how beautiful she is. I'm only human. I just never knew I'd fall for her. All the time I spent trying to hate her because of Soobin, only drew me closer to her. I don't want to go. I'd rather stay here, stay the night, just being around her. To feel myself burning for her. If I do, I'd be selfish to satisfy my own needs. I have to think of Gyu. Gyu would not want me breathing all over his woman. I can see his cutting cold eyes. The sulky pout on his face. And my heart grows faint. I've witnessed it all, and I don't want him to be concerned. Kate said softly, "You're not moving." Cute. I pressed my lips together and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "Why are you so precious? Thank you, Kate, for looking after Soobin. He may give Mari hell tomorrow." She nodded, her eyes falling to her lap, "I know. I'd take him myself, but I'm so tied up here, and with the Gypsy. And she helped me, Tae. She brought me the papers by yesterday. I can't wait to tell Cookie. Can you deliver them to him so he can get them to his attorney? And then finally all this will be over. He'll be free and married to me once and for all." And on that note, that was my cue to go, "I'd be more than happy to. And, yes, that will make Gyu's day. He loves you so much, shortcake. I'm glad to see the two of you tied knot." We left the control room and she walked over to Dooney and Bourke tote and retrieved the envelope. She handed it to me, "Thank you for doing this, Tae." I accepted it with a smile. I turned to go. Wow! I was walking away. I made it to the door, and turned for one last look. I did love her. I loved her more than I should.