The Taming

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Sebastian saw at first a glimpse of booted feet shuffling over stone. And chained hands around thick, dark arms. Covered in muddy filth. He lifted his head and saw the bars of a wall dungeon cell before him. He was in some kind of cave that smelled of the foulest things. Surrounded by cimmerii which scuttled the floors. Fires burned further down the corridor and made the whole cave stifling. Nearly unbearable from the heat and smoke.

"Here's your food, warlord." An ugly firoque man with decaying skin and rotting fingers. He pushed a wood platter under the bottom of the bars. It splattered muck onto the floor.

"I don't want it." The voice came from the person Sebastian was within, but he recognized it.

Chavias.

Chavias was watching Radix speaking to a few firoque. "I've sensed her for months, she's in Ardae."

"We've searched the whole continent, my lord!" A firoque woman complained. "There is no creature like that."

"She has dark wings and blue eyes. I dream of her. She's powerful. Enough to bring the Forever Knights, perhaps this whole land to its knees. Find her for me."

"Why is she so important!" Another woman stomped her foot as she whined. Rubbing her hand over a bald gray head as if wanting to agitatedly sweep her fingers through hair she'd once had.

"Because she is an ideal companion for me. I want her for my mate."

"Why can't one of ours suffice?" A man asked. Gesturing to either of the ugly, nude women.

"They're not enough. This one...She's special."

"Who is she?"

"I don't know. As I said, she's under the protection of a Forever Knight. Once I sense her again though, you will fetch her. Until then, you search."

"We've been searching for an eternity!" A woman complained. "How do you know she even still lives?"

"The Forever Knights wouldn't have killed her. She hasn't fully turned yet."

They whimpered but eventually dropped to all fours to scamper off awkwardly. Their twisted bodies already promising to become either targue or sarabi as their souls continued mutating.

Did you catch it? Chavias whispered in his head. Making Sebastian wonder if it had been Chavias that brought him here.

Too shocked to answer, Sebastian reared from Chavias' mind. Retreating back into himself.

His stomach was twisted in knots. He knew who Radix spoke of.

Elsabet...

***

He drew a long breath. Steadying himself as he called after her back.

"I can't, Elsabet." He choked out. Knowing she'd hate him. "I can't let you go."

She rounded to look him up and down. Drawing a quaking breath before she closed her eyes, as if gathering herself.

"Please." He pleaded. "Please, don't hate me."

"How do you expect me to do that? You're weak. Afraid."

"I am those things, when it comes to you. But it's more than that. He's looking for you."

Radix.

"You think things haven't always searched for me. Bleak, hideous things? I've done fine on my own."

"You don't understand what he is..."

"I've been told that before."

"Loving you isn't a weakness." He defended. Deflating as he realized she wouldn't hear what he wanted to explain to her.

She thinks it's just another excuse. Who can blame her for that, when I've come up with so many?

"It is, when it's a half-love." She spat harshly "A love you do, only for yourself."

She's right.

I was going to let her go because I know that's true.

He was tempted to tell her so. But what point would that serve? To taunt her with what I refuse to do now?

No. He could not tell her.

She crossed her arms over her chest protectively. Massaging her elbows. Her composure cracked, and he glimpsed real, soul-deep pain. The kind she never revealed. But this ache had become so painful that it crept out for him to glimpse.

I'm so sorry. He felt his heart crushing with hers. He deflated. I wanted to give it to you. Finally.

"It's evil. Evil to keep someone against their will for so long." Her tone grew hard with vehemence. "With no reason."

I know. Pain rocked him. You're right.

"It seems..." Her voice slipped into a whisper. "That only when it comes to me, are you capable of true cruelty."

Cruelty?

"No!" He launched to his feet. "Elsabet it's not! It's-" He took a step to chase her, but she'd already gone.

He heard her steps and the swish of her gown, as she left the third level. He couldn't help feeling as though she might be turning away from him forever.

And who could blame her? Were it me in her position, I don't know that I could forgive another.

She'd shown so much kindness and brightness, despite her ever-present anger. She'd let them all see glimmers of the woman she was beneath all that. And they'd all begun to cherish her.

He could feel their growing dissension with his failure to release her.

How will I explain this?

He knew how it would sound.

Even though I've never lied to them. How could they believe me now. His head fell to his hands.

It wasn't cruelty that had him keeping her in WaterRose. It's love. It's wanting to keep you from his clutches.

Elsabet was tough, untouchable. Were it any other creature after her he wouldn't have worried.

But she doesn't know him. She doesn't understand how blackhearted he is. She's so on the cusp of being a monster or an angel...What if he twisted her?

He'd wanted to express his fears to her, to help her understand. Or possibly reassure me that I'm wrong about her. That she couldn't be taken in by the demon.

But he feared trying to say more would only push her further away.

She'll see it all as excuses.

She'd say it's my lust for her that binds her here.

It's not. He didn't have to ask himself that question anymore. His answer was always the same. It's impossible, all-consuming love.

I desire her body far less than the closeness with her, the conversations, the strange comfort of her company in those rare moments that she's vulnerable to me.

The moments when she smiles. When she laughs. Those moments when she reveals her truth.

Now, he thought that possibility was likely gone forever.

Just when I got the courage to do the right thing. He was sorely disappointed in the mess he'd made. The one that now felt inescapable.

I wanted her to want to stand beside me for an eternity...

That hope now washed away like an early morning tide. Leaving him feeling bereft and hopeless in that dark, sorrowful nursery.