Linstead - Broken hearts

Chapter 41

They were silent for a while, Jay didn't know how to start talking, Erin was nervous that if she opened her mouth Maya would move away even further and Maya was scared. Then silence settled for a while until Jay decided to start.

- You know we love you right? - this was important for him to remember, to make clear to her. - That it doesn't matter what's happening, that it doesn't matter what you're going through, nothing like that, never! And I mean this, it will never, no matter what, change. Our love is not something that disappears, it only increases every day...

- You've loved people you no longer love. - she responds.

- Yes, but it's different...

- Because it's different? - she questions him.

- You are my daughter, my little girl...

- I'm not your daughter... - this takes everyone by surprise. Her saying that to Davis was one thing, now saying that to Jay was even worse, but unlike how she spoke to Erin, this time she just reminded Jay of that. Letting her know that she knew.

Her not being Jay's biological daughter wasn't a surprise to anyone there, Maya was little, but her mother made a point of making her go through all this trauma. Jay never said or reminded her of that, because she just wasn't his biologically, besides, she was completely his, always has been, since she was born.

- You are my daughter...

- I know it's not... - she says, her eyes filling. Jay gets up from the couch and approaches her, he pulls out the coffee table and sits down facing her.

- Do you know what it's like to be a father? - he looks at his daughter. - Well, I care for you, I love you and I raise you. It doesn't matter what the blood says or not, what matters is my love for you, I'm the one who has taken care of you since you were little. You were a chubby baby and wouldn't even let me sleep. - he says smiling at her. - Being a father means care, dedication and, above all, love. Do you understand Maya? -He looks at her and a tear falls from her eyes. She nods. - For example, I know something happened to you and it's not me or Erin. Was it at school? - he asks. Soon silence returns, answering his question. - What's going on, daughter? - he wipes her face, he is worried, because he knows that she didn't stay like that for nothing.

- I don't want to get hurt. - she says, still crying.

- Why do you think you're going to get hurt? - Jay asks her.

- Because that's what always happens to me. - she says letting her tears flow.

- No, that's not what always happens to you, I know it's really bad when things get out of our control, but our life isn't that bad, we don't always get hurt. - he says to his daughter and strokes her hair.

- Why does it look so bad, then? - She looks at him.

- What are you talking about? - Jay asks curiously, he didn't understand what his daughter was getting at.

- No one will ever want me. - She says looking at the floor.

- I want you! We want you forever. What is happening? - he looks back and catches Lindsay's gaze trying to be strong. He soon looks back at his daughter.

- I want things to go back to the way they were before. - she says letting the tears fall. - I want everything to go back to the way it was before. - she repeats.

This gets to Erin, she feels like she is being excluded from a part of Maya's life. She remembers all the good times they had together, the moments when she felt a connection with the girl. She had experience with girls due to having Sam as her first "daughter". She always considered Maya from the beginning, she adored Erin, loved Erin doing her hair, putting her to sleep or giving her hugs and kisses.