Mixed Girl Problems

P O S I T I V E

Tears instantly began to fall down my cheeks. I was feeling a mixture of shocked, sad, and fear. It overcame my body as I looked down at the 2 pink lines that laid on the test. I fell to my knees sobbing. At this very moment I couldn't think or speak I could just feel. I felt everything.

His mom walked in and lifted me up she hugged me tightly as my tears had fallen from my face onto her shoulder. She held onto my face as wiping my tears away.

"I know I know." She whispered to me. She then picked up the pregnancy test and then dropped it. "It's going to be okay" she said as holding me.

I looked over her shoulder and saw DeAndre standing there not knowing what to do. He walked out and it felt as if my heart dropped.

After 20 straight minutes of crying and talking to my friends on the phone. I finally was ready to talk to DeAndre. I had so many questions.

I walked down the steps and onto the porch, he wasn't there. I began to grow nervous and I felt my heart pounding through my chest.

He then came from the backyard and slowly walked towards me. I felt relieved as I watched him walk up the porch steps. He walked up to me as looking me in the eyes as I looked into his. He smiled and then wrapped his hands around my waist holding me tightly.

I stood there shocked for a moment. He wasn't angry or upset, he was happy.

"DeAndre..." I began as letting go. "I'm scared." I said as shrugging. I began to cry again and he quickly hugged me.

"It's going to be okay" he whispered in my ear.

He held onto me as I hugged him back. I felt a sense of peace. It was his vibes waving through me.

"What now?" I asked unsure.

"We're having a baby!" He said as smiling. "A baby!"

I began to smile as crying. I nodded as he held onto my stomach.

We both sat on the porch in silence just deep in thought. That's one of things I loved about DeAndre, he allowed me to think and meditate in peace.

I looked up at him with a hundred bad thoughts going through my head, the only consistent good thought was him.

I hope he doesn't think I'm trying to trap him. And is the baby okay? I've been smoking and drinking so much. Am I going to be the one feeling trapped? I never asked for this. I never wanted this. Am I going to regret having this child? Am I going to resent my own child for giving up my youth?

DeAndre finally looked up at me smiling. He began to smoke a cigarette and I wished so badly I could smoke one with him. But I'm going cold turkey for our child. Better late than never.

"I know this ain't what you wanted but... It's going to be okay." He said as smiling.

I crossed my arms and nodded.

"You cool?" He asked as inhaling. I nodded as quickly wiping away a tear.

He put my face in his hand and then kissed me relieving me of all my fears.

I had him, that's all that mattered.

I sat in the schools the next day not knowing what to do. I couldn't bring myself to sit in these classes all day pretending like nothing's wrong.

Persuasion then walked up to me and showed me a picture on her phone.

"I've been looking for you everywhere! There's this party tonight and I think we should go. We should officially celebrate you not being knocked up" She said as smiling.

I shook my head as tears began to run down my cheeks.

"Persausion... I'm.. pregnant" I said as my voice broke. She shook her head in shock.

"No! You can't be! We just checked a couple days ago and-"

"I know but I must've been too early for to come back positive"

She broke down crying as looking at me hurt.

"I'm going to loose you completely now. DeAndre already takes up most of your time now the baby is going to take up the rest" she cried.

"You're not loosing me Persuasion I promise." I cried.

We hugged as we cried.