Iceland's Diary: It Began In Summer

Sunday, March 12

Dear Diary:

I can't even describe what happened today... It's just so

Blegh

I got a text message from someone. Unknown number

???: Hey Iceland

Me: WHO ARE YOU AND HOW DID YOU GET MY NUMBER-

???: Calm, it's me. Liechtenstein

So I added her just because I didn't feel like blocking her

Liechtenstein: Listen, I need a favor

Me: No

Liechtenstein: Please

Me: No

Liechtenstein: plz >w<

Me: No

Liechtenstein: I'll pay you

Me: What?

Liechtenstein: I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend for a party. Just pretending. PLEASE

Then I blocked her...

And got a new message a while after

???: Rude. I have more phones

Me: Why?!

Liechtenstein: Please! It's very important to me!! I need to get in an important fancy club and I can't if I don't have a boyfriend...or girlfriend but I don't feel like being a lesbo. After I get in I'll just say we broke up and done!!

Me: What kind of fucking club is that?

Liechtenstein: lol it's just to prove your maturity or something

Me: That sounds stupid

Me: no

Me: I barley know you

Liechtenstein: Are you taken or something?

Me: ye

Liechtenstein: I'LL TALK TO HER! YOU CAN JUST EXPLAIN I'M SURE SHE'LL UNDERSTAND!

Me: hahahahaHAHAHAHAHA

Liechtenstein: ...........

Liechtenstein: It's not a her, is it?

Me: ........ Nope

Liechtenstein: In that case it's easier! Just explain it to them >w< please please please please

Me: f i ne but you better pay me good

So I screenshoted the whole convo and sent it to Hong Kong

HK: .....

HK: NO

HK: NO NO NO FUCK YOU'RE MINE