All of my 5sos work

Loose Threads: III

Waking up you rolled over and glanced to your clock. Sighing you sat up right, head banging lightly. 6:19am. Not even early enough to be able to go back to sleep. Instead you got up, made a start on your day and tried your best to ignore the headlines.

All of them would soon be plastered about the negativity of last night as opposed to the premiere itself it would be centred around Michael and yourself, missing the point entirely. You attempted to distract yourself from the impending task of today, you knew you had to talk to Michael.

The last time you both had a proper conversation it was when you broke up. The moment you officially called quits and shut the door on him, no more excuses to be made or glances of sympathy to be excepted. It wad done.

You got dressed, the princess attire had been put away along with the fairy tale dream you'd lived in momentarily. Now you lived in reality, you picked up some water and tablets for him knowing he'd be dead to the world and to you until yesterday. No matter how long you tried to delay the drive, hope for red lights it was useless. You knew the drive like the back of your hand, you hit every green light and arrived at his place sooner than without realising it.

Once you stood at his front door you raised your fist but struggled to bring yourself to do it. All you could hear were the arguments, the countless insults as you were woken up to his drunken antics. Turning away you heard the lock click and froze on the spot.

A light confused mutter of your name sounded, you slowly glanced behind you to see him utterly disheveled. He was a mess, worse than you'd ever witnessed. Hair was all over the place, some seemed to be missing. Eyes struggled to remain open, but what you could see is bloodshot, pure red surrounding the green that you once loved. His face remains low, a torn expression worn as you stood still, avoiding eye contact.

Making the first move you passed him some tablets along with the water. The difference in weight made you aware he accepted the offer, and slowly you lifted your head to see him stood behind the door, allowing you to enter. Silently you sighed, unable to walk away now you entered with the little dignity and strength left in you.

Walking inside you tried not to gasp at the wreck it was. Clothes everywhere, things had been broken or badly damaged. It seems that out of all of this he is the least harmed. Part of you wanted to go ahead and help him, ask him what was happening. But to ask would mean to let him back in, and that would mean opening up yourself to get hurt again. It just wasn't worth the risk.

"I just came to talk, you know after last night." You mumbled, you couldn't raise your voice even if you wanted to. The cracking could already be heard as you struggled to hide the shaking of your hands as he stood almost too close to you. The confidence you once had or portrayed in a character had vanished, you couldn't even source it. Instead you were left feeling feeble, just like those long nights alone.

He took a seat on the sofa surrounded by mess whilst you hovered near the doorway. His head was buried in his hands as he moaned loudly, all the while you remained silent, even aware that you might be breathing too loud. "Last night was bad. I erm, I've been working hard." He struggled with his words like yours except he was hungover whereas you are just afraid. "I went into rehab when we broke up, they said it's the temptation and triggers that get you in the end and for me well," He motioned to you standing before him.

"So it's my fault that you drank too much and became an asshole all over again?" You quickly retorted and scoffed lightly.

He shook his head rapidly and mumbled incoherent words. "I acted out and it's my undoing. Just seeing you and realising what I lost because of my own actions hurt bad. All I wanted to do was numb it for a while. It became so numb that the pain had gone and so did my control over my own actions, I didn't want to hurt anyone but something over ride my system." Lifting his head I could see the pain in his eyes. It was distinct yet unknown. Never before had I seen so much regret held in those eyes, even after the things he said when he was at his worst. "Everything I ever said to you I never meant it. I'm getting help, I'm working on finding out what's wrong with me. All I want to do is apologise, I'm not asking you to take me back as it's unrealistic."

"As life isn't the fairy tale it's made out to be." You finished for him, it was something that Ashton always told us as we complimented one another in front of the others. He was always a realist, our realist surrounding the dreamers.

"Six months. I've been told that in six months time I'll be improved, my mental state would be like it once was. No more alcohol, no more of negative surroundings and no love." His eyes flickered up to yours as you remained stubborn, not moving or making any facial expressions beside neutral.

"I'm happy you're getting help Michael, I really am." You smiled as you slowly backed away. "Six months eh? A lot can happen in six months but I do hope you find who you are." Backing up you felt your back connect to the door. Turning you sigh as you feel the light pang spread through your spine and close your eyes momentarily.

As you open them you see Michael now stood up close to you. He trembles, unable to make eye contact. If you were to take us out of this scene it would resemble our first kiss, the first spark I truly felt between us. Now it is replaced by an uncomfortable silence. "Before you go I just want to say something." He spoke up with some confidence, more than I expected. "You will always be the love of my life. Last night you looked radiant and your performance out shinned any you've done before. No more loose threads Y/n. You're free."

You nodded and left, unable to speak. As the door closed behind you the ability to breathe returned. A long ragged breath came out from your lungs and the tears brimmed your eyes as you left. His words replayed in your mind, "No more loose threads." You told yourself, hoping that soon you'd believe it.