A Teacher's Diary

To Teach or Not To Teach

November 27, 2016
Sunday

Time flies by so fast. And I am still trying to get by with all the things that have been going on.

We're busy at school. There are no days that we aren't. And I do seriously get tired. But I am really trying not to stress out myself. I intend not to take home any work from school. And I intend to just enjoy everything I do from there. Because sooner or later, I would leave.

Truth is, a part of me wants to give up on teaching. Well, I have my own reasons.

I want to look for another job wherein I could really earn money and save for my future.

Seriously, I want to be rich but... I am a teacher. It hurts that being a teacher hinders me in getting rich in terms of money.

But... Why do I want to be rich? Because then... Let us face it. In reality, money can grant anything you wish. Money is the ticket for the privileges we need. And, money would buy the things that make our love ones happy.

And teaching? Well... I don't know. I am just sure that I'm not a great teacher. I happen not to be effective to them, my pupils. And it breaks my heart. This is another reason that I want to quit.

I am really having a hard time trying to figure out what path I should really take. Because in my heart of hearts, all I really want to accomplish in my life is to be able to travel the whole world.

All I want is everything but adventure.

But how can I do it without money? Ha! Life is really complicated, don't you think?

I think about my purpose. Is it really to teach? When I don't even want to have a lot of responsibilities? I also don't like to be restricted with the things I want to do. I want to feel free. I don't want people judging me and expecting a lot from me. I just want to be myself. I want to be just me wherein I don't have to please anybody but myself. Sounds selfish right? (Sigh.)

Life is a nightmare~