A Teacher's Diary

To the Girl Who Feels Like Giving Up

To the girl who feels like giving up.....
I see you!

I know you think no one notices....
but I do.

I see that there was once a spark in those hazel eyes of yours.
They have seen so much pain.
I can tell that so many stories hide behind those tired eyes.

I see that you are exhausted, and not in the 'I want to lay down and go to sleep kind of tired'.
The exhaustion of many hidden tears, and days full of anxiety and heart ache.

You're tired from fighting to get through it all.
You have fought so damn hard and I am so proud of you!

You have made it this far....
You might not see the strong woman I see, but I promise you, she is there within you.

You hold a lot back.
You keep your mouth shut just to avoid conflict, but it's okay to stand up for yourself once in a while.

It's okay to show emotion.
It makes you human.
You are allowed to feel as deeply as you want and express yourself as much as you want.

You try so hard to come off as a hard shell, but I see so much light with in you.
It radiates from you even though you might try to dim it to protect yourself, I can still see it.

I know it is really hard right now to see the light at the end of this seemingly long tunnel...
please believe me when I tell you it is there.

Nothing lasts forever, which means this difficult phase of life you are going through, it'll end one day.

I truly hope that for you it'll be soon because I know you have already endured so much.

You deserve to be happy.
To be ecstatic.
To feel on top of the world.
To skip and jump and dance with joy. To feel it so deeply.

I know it's time for something amazing to happen to you and I know with all my heart it's coming.

Please just do me a favor....
hang in there.

I know you feel drained from life and you feel lost and stuck.
You don't even know what you are doing anymore.
I know you feel that way.
I can see it.

Maybe it's just that I read you well....
but I know...
God, I know how you are feeling and I hate seeing you like this.

I know the optimistic, happy woman you are is still inside you,
she's just been weighted down over the years from all that weight she's been carrying.

I promise that weight will be lifted and everything will fall into place.

I promise you one day you will be able to look back and think,
'wow I made it through all that.'

Then you will see the strong woman I am seeing now.

Hold on please....
a while longer.

- April Lee