Dirty Little Bastard

55

I was reasonably mad.

I parked my car outside the gate surrounding Theo's property, and stomped to the main front gate to ring the buzzer.

Pablo and another buff looking security guy were chatting on the driveway, visible to me through the gate.

"Pablo!" I called, catching his attention and then motioning for him to come to me. With a very confused look, he did.

"Miss Dubois? Is everything alright?" His brows were furrowed as he studied me standing on the other side of the gate on the sidewalk.

"No. I need to talk to Theo. Now," my tone was harsh, and I hoped he wouldn't take it personally.

"I, uh... shall I call him?" Pablo asked, glancing back over his shoulder at Theo's house.

I knew if it was up to Theo, he wouldn't see me. For me to be able to knock any sense into him though, I needed to be face to face with him as soon as possible.

"No, that really won't be necessary. Could you please just open the gate and let me in?" I let out a small breath, trying to calm myself down.

I couldn't believe Theo had just left like that; as if I was some sort of simple sexual conquest. Waking up to find out he wasn't there was a horrible feeling, especially since I had believed we might be able to start working past all the bullshit.

I could tell Pablo was hesitating. He knew me, though, and that I wasn't some crazy fan or stalker.

"Please? It's very important..." I managed to give him a small smile, one as sweet as I could muster in my current state.

He studied me for a moment, before clearing his throat and giving me a nod.

As soon as the gate had opened up a bit for me to be let in, I stormed towards Theo's front door, leaving Pablo and the other security guard behind.

I heard Pablo assuring the other man that I was Theo's girlfriend, and no threat.

I rang the doorbell once, and then a few times after, until the door slowly opened.

"Scarlett..."

I pushed past him and inside, surely seeming like a flamethrower on wheels.

"No. What made you do that? Have sex with me and then just leave like that? How do you think that makes me feel?" I folded my arms over my chest and turned to him with a stern expression painting my features.

He sighed in defeat and closed the front door, wearing a simple tracksuit, before turning to face me.

"I'm sorry. It shouldn't have happened, I shouldn't have talked to you at all last night..." he gave me a sympathetic look and I scoffed, feeling my throat tightening up with warning of my overflowing emotions. Anger was covering up my hurt.

"But you did talk to me. I need you to stop this, Theo. I'm serious," I began, still not calming down, "I want us to be okay again. I've forgiven you. I could have slept with anyone when we were just dating, as well, it's not a big deal!"

"How are you not angry with me for it, though? You don't feel the least bit like I led you on?" He frowned, the emotional space between us growing bigger by the second.

"I was angry with you! The whole week after Russia, I was mad at you! You have no clue how many times I processed everything, each possibility of what could come of us, and always seemed to find myself with the same result," I was now flailing my arms around, trying to make him understand, "I love you. And I don't want us to end, okay?"

I shut myself up after I realised what I'd just told him. The first time I told him I loved him had to be in the middle of an emotional-turmoil-fuelled rant.

We were both silent. I looked away from his widened and shocked dark eyes, feeling embarrassed now.

I sighed and gathered myself, before speaking calmly, "I wish you'd have respected me enough to not just leave. It really hurt."

"You love me?"

"I do," I met his intense gaze again, my heart skipping a tiny beat at the intensity of them, "this is not my way of wheeling you back in. If you really don't want us to be together anymore, just say it straight-up. I'm a big girl, I can take it. Just don't continue this 'I'm leaving you alone so you can be happy' bullshit..."

He blinked slowly and took a small step closer to me. I was nervously awaiting for him to say something, anything, instead of staring at me.

"We shouldn't have had sex drunk like that..."

I sighed and nodded in agreement, "there's not much changing it now."

"I'm sorry for leaving, Scarlett," he told me after a moment of silence, "I shouldn't have, I didn't want to."

"Why did you then? Because it was a mistake?" I raised my brows at him a bit, expecting a truthful answer.

Theo ran his hand through his hair and sighed as well, "I should have left you alone."

"Did you just hear me when I told you I love you?" I managed a tiny smile, trying to relax him and seem less threatening, "I don't want you to leave me alone. Tell me you don't want to leave me alone, or I'll walk out and you'll never have to see me again."

His lips parted in preparation to speak, but no words seemed to leave.

"Theo?" I gently urged, heart breaking by each passing moment.

Just as I was about to lose hope and register the painful fact that maybe he really didn't want to be together with me anymore, he closed up the space between us and hugged me. He didn't kiss me, simply wrapped me in his strong arms and squeezed the life out of me.

I hugged back, still unsure if this was a goodbye hug or something different.

"I don't want to leave you alone, I don't think I even can," a small chuckle left his lips, sounding relieved to finally be giving in. He could feel me relaxing in his arms at the fact that we weren't over.

I found myself smiling and tightened my hold on him. I forced myself to pull back rather soon though, needing to know exactly what this now meant.

"Where does this leave us?" I asked him and cleared my throat, inching back just a little to gain space between us again which enabled me to think a little more clearly.

His dark gaze studied mine, the sides of his lips tugging up in a small smile, "I want us to be okay. I'm sorry for hurting you, Scarlett, really."

"Everything's fine, I forgive you. I want us to be okay too..."

Instead of replying, he cupped my jaw and kissed me.