Milly actually update regularly challenge 🤪
Recap: Awsten and Geoff came back from the trip n Geoff came out as gay n Awsten was cold. Yeah, that's about it.
Five weeks didn't feel very long. It didn't feel like thirty-five days or eight-hundred and forty hours, over fifty-thousand minutes and three-million seconds. That was a long fucking time, which is why it was incomprehensible as to how Awsten had possibly have stayed at Geoff's house for five weeks already.
He was uneasy about it at first, sure, but he had quickly grown to appreciate this family, respectively. He was treated like a son-in-law. He was treated like Geoff's boyfriend.
Respect was something that Awsten was unfamiliar with. He was so used to being thrown around that the fundamental thought of being invited to family outings with a family that was not his own was completely unknown. But he felt accepted. He felt cared for.
He could see why Gracie spent so much time here. He hadn't seen her since he had run away, though, as she had, understandably, been grounded from the pregnancy. He wanted to go see her, but talking to her on Geoff's phone every night would suffice.
Geoff's family wasn't home today, again. Neither was Geoff.
Both of the boys were surprised that they had been left the house to themselves the very first day that it had happened, but seeing as though it was a Thursday, there probably wasn't much lenience in that decision. Geoff's parents were working and Sarah was at school. Either that or ditching, but it doesn't matter because now we have the place to ourselves.
The intimacy that was obtained from pure privacy was not denied its place, since being alone was for five days a week, for five weeks, was plenty enough time to touch, and cuddle, and make-out, and have sex. Intimacy, he had learned, did not need to be sexual, however. He knew that he didn't love Geoff yet but the oxytocin had been suffocating him without a break in time and he certainly felt a little light headed whenever it came to being held by Geoff or just touching him or listening to his sweet, careful voice or just simply looking at him. It wasn't suggestive. It was just what it was.
Geoff hadn't been home as much as Awsten would have liked him to, although with having blown out all of his money when they had gone away, the older boy really could have used the extra shifts. Being home alone wasn't too bad, either. That's usually when he ate, because being alone made him all that bit more comfortable.
But today he sat downstairs in the basement and stared at the postered wall while he waited patiently. It didn't feel like he missed the older boy, not quite; it was more of a craving, one that made his mouth taste sour if he was separated from his lust for too long. Not like cigarettes. He didn't need those as badly and that addiction was lethal, which only made him that slight bit more curious.
The breaks could be nice, too, sometimes. The little breaks that they managed to get during the days were the barricade between the pair getting exhausted of each other's company. Not like it was a bad thing, but Awsten knew that if he wanted this to last then he would have to slow down. He didn't want to wear out their relationship, which Geoff agreed to.
Things felt different, now. His automatic response did not need to be sustaining a mentality of high alert as a constant. He could breathe sometimes. He could feel safe. And he often did. His sleeping was better, in terms of dreaming of terror, and his eating was becoming borderline. He was trying, at least, regardless of how much he hated it, which was a lot.
He glanced back to the time. Geoff got off his shift in a little bit over an hour which meant that he didn't have to be swallowed by boredom. Staring at a wall was just the epitome of what he was feeling. It gave him the chance to consider all of the layers and layers of pressure and self-deprecation that he'd been struggling from for years as he sat in his room and, much similarly to this, stared at a plain white wall.
And maybe months ago he wouldn't have had a problem with staring at a wall because that's all he did, all day long, just about each day as the passed the same. But now he knew how he wanted to spend his time, he definitely did not want to be stuck here.
But he willingly sat and stared. He sat and stared and waited because that was enough to keep him from going insane in the meantime.
YOU ARE READING
Serendipitous (Gawsten)
Fanfiction[COMPLETED] An apathetic boy with colourblindness and too many problems serendipitously meets a boy who may be able to help him feel all of the colours he'd never seen.
