A MAN'S SORROW CUTS DEEPER

Was he enough....

Can Divit was no fool. He had a keen eye for detail. He often noticed details that others were too blind or too ignorant to see. And he trusted his instinct, that gut feeling within. It was very seldom wrong. His decision to surrender to the love he felt deep within for Sanem was in part based on that instinct. He decided to trust. He found that he needed to trust, for he yearned to belong to someone, for the first time in his life.

And trusted he did. He trusted in her love, her pure sincerity and her happiness toward him and others as well. But as life had a way of testing love, he was forced to face his darkest fears when it came to love. He knew how important trust was in life. And he understood better than anyone how important trust was in a relationship. The trust that someone loved him. The trust that they would stay. And the trust they would never lie. When Hüma left him when he was a child, her actions left a rift so deep in his heart that Aziz was never able to heal it. When Can met Sanem, for the first time in his life he forgot about that rift in his heart. His heart began to heal with the light Sanem brought to his life. So many times he mentioned to Sanem if he could only explain how she made him feel, because he himself never knew before how fulfilling and beautiful love could feel.

But that light beaming at him from Sanem dimmed more than once. She crushed his trust. The betrayal he felt ripped his heart wide open. Never a man to cry, he fought a battle within not to let a tear out. He cried enough of them after Hüma left. And the love he felt for Sanem won that battle within, and for the first time in his life he began to forgive. He forgave Emre, and he forgave Sanem. To him, living without her was no living af all. If her light did not shine right next to him, the world felt like darkness. The moment she chose to stay and not go to Izmir with Yigit, felt like a thousands little suns beamed into his heart. And it felt exactly the opposite when Sanem did not accept his stretched out hand at the hospital when they fought over Sanem...

Can could not explain why she failed to trust him. The year they spent apart, when he contemplated over her failed trust for him also did not provide any answers. He put her trust in her, and it seemed she denied him hers. Somehow she trusted Yigit. And he could not understand why. Even after they were engaged, she still trusted him more. And because she trusted, she was blind to see that Can was right, and right all along. The pain he felt leaving that hospital, and leaving Sanem behind was unbearable. Each step he took, he was stepping deeper into darkness, and away from her light. It took him that whole year to realize that without Sanem, the darkness that filled him would forever encompass his heart...

Can realised that Ceycey saw Yigit's treachery too. And it was Ceycey who stood guard by Sanem's side foe the past 12 months. And for this Can would be grateful to him forever. Now that he was back, all that mattered to him was that Sanem needed to find out what kind of man Yigit was. Can only wished that Sanem knew he did not burn her notebook. Wishing for more was beyond all hope, because it would mean trusting Sanem with his heart again. And that was the price he was fighting not to pay. But he paid it. The moment he saw her at the pier by his boat, he knew that his heart was no longer his. It belonged to Sanem, and it always would. It would long for her for as long as he'd live...

Finding out Camal stole Sanem's work filled him with anger. He controlled it, but he swore he would not sit still and watch her get hurt. When they found out the location of Camal's warehouse and Sanem went with her gut feeling to go inside and search the warehouse, as much as he feared for her, he had to admit he admired her for it. And he realized that aside from her inside voice she also had that gut feeling...

As much as he admired Sanem for going with her gut feeling at the warehouse, he felf at a complete loss for words when they stood face to face with Yigit and Camal. She saw the proof of Yigit's vicious games right before her. She saw the proof in the photographs Can showed her as well. And the only thing she could say to him was that was enough. He was at a loss for words. Yigit was a liar. He knew it from the start. He begged her to connect the dots. He pleaded with her to think. And he left, more defeated than ever before.

Walking to the car, his steps felt worse than those steps at the hospital. Last time Sanem was unaware of Yigit's lies. Now, she made the choice to stop Can from speaking with all the facts. And he felt defeated. She chose Yigit's side, and not his side yet again. Not his. He could not fathom to think why his proof wasn't enough? Why he wasn't enough? Was he ever enough? Standing by the car his mind was telling him to leave. But his heart was telling him to stay. Stay and fight, if only for that one last time.

And then he heard her. She did go after him. She did reach out to him. Not just with her hand. But with her heart in her words. She said she trusted him, and repeated it too. And she begged him not to leave. Not to turn his back on her. For all eternity, not to leave her again even if the world fell apart. He was at a loss for words for the second time that day. But this time his heart swam, and the sorrow he just felt was giving way to her light. He asked what she wanted from him, for he finally understood being partners or neighbors would not work if she did not trust him. And her response was all that he needed. The force of the kiss exploded in their souls. The love and the longing, the happiness and the ache. And he hoped that this kiss, so long missed from his lips, was the kiss that signified a new beginning for them.