When The Stars Align

Chapter 43

James POV

My life was good, I felt good in my shoes for once in my life. My career was doing great, my relationship was awesome and the one I've always wanted. I loved being a father and felt, somehow, comfortable being one, and if it wasn't for Sarah's illness, everything was perfect. I didn't bring the wedding subject up again...not that I didn't want it, but Andrea hurt me a bit with her sudden reaction. It's a fact...my proposal was also sudden...I wasn't counting on it; I was thinking about it and the words just formed in my mind and my voice gave them life and then I was hurt. I didn't give up on the idea though, it has been taking place in my mind and to me it makes sense, since I love her, and I know that she loves me. Maybe I should have taken her reaction as nervousness. We have a family, we're good together, we're trying to have another baby and why not? Isn't that what people do? Isn't it supposed to be the option when you love someone the way I love her?

Andrea means the world to me. She means all I want to have in my life, she heals me in so many ways...ways she doesn't even know. I don't think she is truly aware of how I was before I met her again. All the drinking, the women, everything I gave up since we're together and everything I don't miss too. Everything was so predictable, I am enjoying the new me, my new life. Above all I don't want to hurt her and lose her. Andrea is not the type of person that would cope with all the shit I was involved in; plus there's our daughter and I can't let my little girl down. No...no way... I would never forgive myself for that. Anyway, since they are in my life, I never felt the need for it, even though I know I am walking on thin ice, I just hope I can keep on walking without making the it crack, and I fall in cold waters.

Metallica's new project was almost done and ready to get into the stores. Nothing that have made me or Lars too tired. We just had to go through a lot of live recordings, and we made this box with two live concerts and a video. There's also a book which covers the whole Black Album's tour. Now...well now we had a concert we decided to do just before Christmas, in San Francisco and next we were going into the studio again, but this time to create. I had zillions of ideas in my head, millions of riffs and such great inspiration. A new album seemed right to me and it would keep me with my two loves a bit more...maybe three as we were trying to add a new member to our family.

"So Andrea's parents are coming here to spend Christmas with you guys?" Lars asked as we were rehearsing for the gig.

"Yeah...she's picking them up tomorrow at the airport. They will be in our gig." I said. Kirk began to laugh, and I raised an eyebrow looking at him. "What is it fucker?" I asked.

"Do you have an idea that her father is going to look at you as the guy who got her 17-year-old daughter pregnant?" He told me. I rested my hands in my waist and tried to look confident.

"That was years ago. Sarah is already 10." I said.

"I think Kirk is right." Jason blurted and they all laughed which caused me to shudder a bit, since that had crossed my mind too.

"It might have been some years James, but you were not around and now you are." Lars said.

"Fuck you all." I said picking up my guitar back and playing a chord, yanking a loud and distorted noise off it.

"Wow...he's nervous!" Lars said laughing.

"I am not!" I exclaimed. "Now, let's rehearse because my daughter is going to be here tomorrow and I want to make her proud, her and Andrea.

"And her parents..." Kirk said. I shot him a murderous gaze.

"Don't look at me that way!" He said giving me a peace sign. "Of course you want to impress you future parents in law." I turned around to look at Lars and he threw his hands in the air.