My Bijou! A Maylor Love Story

I Just Want To Testify...Part 1

22nd September 1976

London

Roger's POV

"I think you need to explain yourself...really?.. a divorce Rog?"  Jo's response was one of disbelief and surprise at my choice of words.  Maybe I am over reacting right now but I think I mean it.  If there is no trust, then what is the point?  Jo walked to her cocktail cabinet and poured two glasses of whisky.  She walked over and handed me one.  "Drink this and then tell me what happened..."  she said.  I took the glass from her and had a large sip and savored the effect.  I walked over to her sitting area and flopped down on her small couch.  She joined and faced me as she looked at me with concern in her eyes.  I reached in my jacket pocket for my cigarettes.  I lit one and she stuck her hand out and took it.  I grabbed another for myself.  We sat in silence as I organized my thoughts.

"We went and saw Mack and it was clear that Brian doesn't trust me....never has since last year..."  I explained to her.  "He won't believe that I wasn't flirting with Dom and admitted that he believes when I behave that way with other people, it is possible I am going to sleep with them.  Can you believe this?"  I declared to her with irritation.  She listened to me and seemed to be processing my statement.  She took a drag from her cigarette and reached over the back of the couch for an ashtray.  She tapped her cigarette and looked at me. 

"I want to have a really honest conversation with you and I want you to really listen to me.."  Jo announced.  I nodded agreement.  I need this.  I need her help.  

"Okay.."  I responded.  Jo took a deep breath and looked me in the eye.  

"I think you and Brian do have some real issues but I think you might be over reacting right now...."  she informed me.  I disagreed with her but decided to hear what she had to say before I spoke.  I nodded for her to proceed. "Did Brian tell you he wanted to end your relationship?"  she asked me.  I shook my head.

"No...but to be honest...I didn't let it get that far.."  I told her and took another sip of my drink.  

"What did he say?"  

"I ask him if he thought I was going to sleep with anyone I had a meaningful conversation with and his response was...get this....not everyone!"  I told her with an air of outrage.  She leaned towards me and took my hand.

"How did you respond to this?"  she asked me.

"Well...I got up and left.."  I replied.  Jo looked surprised.

"Wait!  You just left?"  she asked me with disbelief.  I nodded an affirmation. Jo looked really concerned.

"Rog...I think you left the therapist prematurely.."  she told me.  "I know what Brian said upset you but you should have stuck it out and talked more about this..." I could see her point to a degree but 'what is the point?'  If he doesn't trust me?  

"What is the point if he doesn't trust me?"  I challenged to her.  Jo sighed again and ran her hand over mine.

"Roger....you have cheated on him more than once!  You got a girl pregnant and you told me that even though you knew what you were doing was wrong...you still cheated on him more than once last year.." she told me bluntly.  "Of course he has trust issues!"  she told me firmly.  "I know I would!"  I smashed my cigarette out in the ashtray and drank the final dregs of my glass of whisky.  

"So you think I'll do it again?....Is that it?"  I asked her directly.  She seemed to think for a moment before she answered.  Just like Brian did. Fuck!  She does think I will do it again!