The Cold Star |Seventeen FF |

65: Not anymore

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I let out a mocking smile to myself as I looked into the mirror in front of me. I was already in my school uniform and left with tying my hair. I felt something uncomfortable in my stomach, knowing I would confront them.

I was the one who ask for breakup, but why did it hurts so much?

I wanted to hear his explanation. But, why I feel scared to listen the truth?

For one week, I had skipped school even after the holiday had ended. My mind decided to go today just because I met the other boys and they succeed on convincing me.

Such an irresistable assurance..

During those moments at home, little by little, the hurtful perception started to slip into my mind as I figured out some hidden reasons..

The reason behind the thought of Wonwoo got so emotional and infuriated when a man tried to harm me. I was confused of his sorry meant for, and now it was anything other than..

'I'm sorry..that I can't protect you now and even in the past..'

The meaningful stares that Wonwoo was silently giving me during our first exchange of word when I treated his injury at the futsal court. The sorrow and hesitation in his eyes when he and Jaehun looked at me, it all started to make sense in my head.

Reaching my phone, there were unread notifications on the screen that just make me sigh.

30 missed calls and 17 unread messages from wonwoo
20 missed calls and 6 unread messages from mingyu 💜

For days I was in a mess, I had been wondering how much had my fate in the past caused pain to the people around me here and now. Instead of blaming everyone for all these events to happen, I blamed it on myself. Because I thought this place was where I was belong to...

I closed my eyes and let out a soft sigh before I quickly get ready and tied up my hair, pushing all the thought at the back of my head.

"Haeun, are you ready?"

"Yes, I'm coming!"

I heard Hoshi was calling me. I grabbed my bag and wore my socks. But before I made any step out from my bedroom, the bracelet that I wore ever since I got it and the couple ring on my finger caught my eyes.

By instinct, I took off the meaningful accessories from my hand and immediately went downstairs.

I inhaled a deep breath, trying to remain intact and peaceful. Probably, it was the best thing to do and not to get tied down with anything.

"Let's go Soonyoung." I slipped into my shoes as Hoshi was already waiting by the door.

I had been calling Hoshi with his real name all these while. And it kinda special because almost no one call him that.

"Let's goooo or we're gonna be late." He beamed cheerfully.

My eyes flickered up to find Jaehun made his way towards us."Are you going to school today?"

My mood immediately flattened as soon as he was in my sight. I knew I should hear his explanation, but I couldn't help myself but to feel disappointed at him. I rolled my eyes at him.

I pretended I didn't see him and gave Hoshi a quick glance, saying don't to bother about Jaehun.

I was about to turn my heel to walk away, when he grabbed my wrist in a strong grip. His tight grasp making me winced in pain as turned around and looked at him angrily.