WangXian Forever 4

Chapter 13 Time

SiZhui couldn't believe what was happening to him. A week had passed and that stupid idiot hadn't returned. Was he really going ahead with it? How could he? Was he really in the dark about how SiZhui felt for him? And why was this so difficult?

SiZhui felt betrayed.

Out of the blue, the news of this wedding had knocked him out of his stupor, lighting the slowly growing flames of love, which apparently was one sided. Only one other knew of his affections, but even he expressed a few negative emotions upon hearing. JingYi thought he, SiZhui hadn't been at all clear in telling Jin Ling how he felt. Was that true?

He had tried, he was sure of it. He had presented Jin Ling with a flower, the first of the new magnolia blossoms, even climbing the great tree to get it. That had been a feat in itself, the branches too high to climb without steps. Too late, he had realised that he could have gotten his precious flower while balancing on his sword, but surely there was something to be said for anything gained through perseverance.

Jin Ling had accepted it, too. Wasn't that a sign? There were other things, perhaps small and inconsequential to anybody else, but after that, he expected Jin Ling to understand, when he kept asking for his presence during night hunts, when he offered to clean his arrows and such.

The truth was, he didn't understand what was going on in Jin Ling's mind. He didn't even know who he was marrying? Why not? And another fear took wings: was he being forced to marry?

It was not unheard of, especially since Jin Ling was the next Leader of JinLinTai. Many sects preferred arranged marriages for two reasons; first the semi guarantee of future heirs, and secondly, it maintained some semblance of control regarding who entered the family and clan, ensuring a pureness of lineage.

SiZhui hadn't really given thought to marriage yet. But ever since Jin Ling mentioned it, it was all he could think about. Would he make a good husband? He liked to think so, especially if it was all about the best interests of your spouse.

He sighed dreamily. His only experience of a married couple was his parents. Even he could tell that they had something special, a connection that went way beyond their bodies. It was in the way each held the other, the silent communication without words that resulted in perfect understanding. How one would move out of the way of the other, a continuous dance based on their expectations of where the other would be.

They rarely needed to talk, his father Zhan being less vocal was his nature, and yet father Wei spoke often and a lot. He knew his father enjoyed the sound; he had once found himself looking his way while father Wei was speaking. The complete rapture on his face, his whole attention on the words coming out of his mouth, his eyes resting on that well loved face. It was something he would never forget.

Father Wei transformed his other father. His face would soften, filled with love. It was a face that did not show what the wearer was feeling, but in those small instances, his features opened to reveal his heart.

Father Zhan had a similar effect on his father Wei. To anyone else, it would seem that father Wei was just as talkative, animated and lively with his husband as with anyone else, but SiZhui knew different.

Father Wei showed his true feelings in other ways, in the twinkle of his keen, silver eyes sparkling with love. How he would curl into his husband, craving physical touch. The way his hand always searched for the other's, even unconsciously. They were always touching, SiZhui reflected.

Whether that was because of their forced separation or just because neither could stand being far away from the other, but SiZhui knew better. He remembered waking up at night and seeing his father, alone in bed and crying in his sleep. His father had suffered so much.