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Welcome To My Deep 3AM Thoughts

Poetry

Dive deep into my thoughts with me. A break up pushed me over the edge and it's time for a change. These are all of my late night thoughts, fears, and emotions. It gets real and raw and its not for the faint of heart. I hope this helps whoever it re...

#breakup #diary #emotional #family #friendship #healing #journal #late #lonely #love #mentalhealth #night #relationship #sadness #safeplace #selfdiscovery #selflove #thoughts

If By Chance.

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by sarahewrites

by sarahewrites

                                        
                                                  

                              "It'll take time." 
                               "It'll go by, you won't even realize it."
                               "You're going to laugh about it months from now." 
                               "You'll forget about it." 
                               "Someone better will come along." 
                               "You'll make room for the pain." 
                               "You'll eventually go numb." 
                               "It just takes time." 
                               "You're not just ready yet." 
                               Two months later.
                               "You just need to stop living in the past." 
                               "You keep talking about it." 
                               "I heard he's in a new relationship" ... ouch. 
                               "You still cry about it. You should stop that." 
                               "You need to move on."
                               "If you block his number, you will feel better." 
                               "There's plenty of people out there to date." 
                               "You'll be okay." 
                               "Maybe you shouldn't think about it." 
                               "You have to let it go." 
                               Four months later. 
                               "I don't know why you can't just move on." 
                               "If he wanted to, he would." 
                               "I can't believe you still wait for him." 
                               "You're breaking your own heart." 
                               "He's happier now so why are you still stuck on it?" 
                               How do you think I feel? I am trying. Please stop telling me it's going to take time. Time has passed. It has been nothing but time. I have blocked his number. Five times now. I have stopped my own tears more times than I can count. I have stopped talking about it. I have tried talking to people but, do you not understand the fear? Am I okay? Should I really feel this way? Is this what being "okay" feels like? Let go... Why don't you let go? You're sitting on cloud nine looking at wedding rings. Why don't you let go? You're sleeping with a different person every night. Why don't you let go? You are throwing back beers to forget it even happened. Why don't you let go? You just got into a relationship. You haven't even had your first fight yet. Why don't you let go? "You just need to heal." Do you have any idea how much effort that takes? Do you have any idea how much effort I even have left to keep going for myself? I understand if he wanted to, he would. But, for the love of god, please shut the fuck up. It's always "it just takes time." And never "how much time do you need?"  You want me to let go so bad.. Why don't you let go of your happiness first? You won't. Because, you would be a fucking mess without that person, wouldn't you? I get to feel that every day. Please, shut the fuck up.