Voyage With Me (Yoonmin)

Part 34 - I Love You

Jimin's POV:

When we got to Avignon, I was in a bit of a daze.  Between Tae's theory and the cryptic phone call from Hobi, my mind was running non-stop. Suga (or is he Yoongi?) slept for a couple of hours and seemed to be in pretty good spirits.

We checked into the hostel, dropped off our gear and then went for a walk.  I didn't have anywhere specific in mind, I just wandered. 

Suga:  Is something wrong?  You seem kind of out of it.

Jimin: I forgot to do my research on this town.  So we're just going to walk around.  We'll see what we see.

It's not like we've got anywhere we have to be. And I needed to clear my head.  We wandered around for a few hours.  I don't know that it helped much, but we did get some sightseeing in.  There were several historic structures from the 12th and 13th century.  I remembered some from college classes.  However, I just wasn't into them like usual. 

Suga sensed that I was not myself and kept trying to nibble on my neck.  It was distracting because I kept questioning whether he was my cat or the man I've been dreaming about for the past month.

It started getting dark and I wondered if Suga's nibbling had more to do with him being hungry.  Actually, I was pretty hungry too.  So I got some takeout from a nearby restaurant and we sat in a garden overlooking the river. 

Jimin: I'm sorry I've been out of it.  I have a lot on my brain between what Hobi and Tae had to say.

Suga: Tae? When did you speak with him?  Did my brother finally tell him something?

Jimin: I don't know what to believe.  You are definitely a cat.

Suga:  Yes, but ...

Jimin:  An extraordinary cat to be sure.  But you are so cat-like.  It's hard to imagine that you're possibly .... I can't even bring myself to say it.

Suga: Yes you can.

Jimin:  How stupid would it be for you to be him and have been with me this whole time? I would be the biggest idiot ever.  Like what Hobi was saying, I'd hate myself if this was true.  Hate myself for not being smart enough to puzzle it out sooner.

Suga: Don't say that.  How could you know?  It's beyond what seems possible.  I love you.  I don't care how long it takes for you to realize the truth.

Jimin: If you were him, you'd probably hate me for not figuring this out.

Suga: I could never hate you.  You are my soulmate, I knew it from the first time I saw you glowing in that tulip field.  I have fallen head over heels in love with you.  This won't change that fact.

I scooped Suga up and held him close to me.

Jimin:  I'm sorry for being mopey.  I have a lot on my mind.

Suga reached out and touched my face.  He looked in my eyes and I felt that he truly cared for me.  I felt loved. 

That night in the hostel, I tossed and turned.  When I woke up, Suga was still asleep.  I felt like I'd hardly slept at all.  Most of the night I spent thinking about the past few months.  About what I knew of Yoongi after reading his journal.  About Suga and our time together.  My brain just wouldn't shut off.

But it was the fruitless type of thinking where my thoughts seemed to be caught up on a hamster wheel. I had many theories going in circles.  None of my thoughts made much sense.  Suga woke up and looked at me.  He touched my face, as if sensing that I wasn't doing well.

Suga: Are you ok? 

Jimin:  I couldn't sleep.

Suga: Still thinking about what Hoseok said?  And Tae? I wish I'd heard that conversation.