A Survivor's Diary of the Apocalypse (TWD/Daryl Dixon)

S8Pt11 - How Pete Turned

It was the next morning, and the Hilltop was already awake. The last of the bodies were getting moved out and buried. Maggie was making a plan to go on a run for more supplies, since after last night our resources were low. I walked down the steps of the porch and saw that Tara was driving and parked a car with the rest of them. I haven't seen her since last night, and after learning that Dwight shot her with an arrow, I wanted to go talk to her and make sure she was okay.
She turned off the engine and opened the car door by the time I walked over, and I waved to her.
"How's the arm?" I asked and pointed at hers.
"Ehh, could've been worse. Saddiq said it should heal up quickly, it's just gonna be sore." She explained.
I nodded and held out my hand, and she raised her arm. I grabbed it and she rolled up her sleeve, and I saw a fresh bandage wrapped around her bicep. I nodded again and let go of her arm.
"See, not too bad." She said.
"Hey." We then heard Daryl say from behind us. "You shouldn't be out here."
"Oh, it's just a scratch, man." Tara said and looked at Daryl. "I can still help."
"What if it wasn't?" Daryl asked.
"Then it'd be my own damn fault. He's back with them because of me." Tara said, trying to defend Dwight.
"No, he's back with 'em 'cause that's who he is." Daryl said, getting defensive too.
"We— We got lucky." Tara said. "Finding Maggie. Rick. It could've been different. It was, for me, when I was with the Governor."
"But you weren't one of them." I said, looking back at Tara and trying not to think of the bad memories.
"But I was with them." Tara then said, and I just bowed my head, because I knew why she was defending Dwight. "Your brother, too."
I raised my head up and looked automatically over at Daryl, and I saw that he took a step forwards to Tara.
"My brother? My brother ran the wrong way his whole life. If he were here, if I stuck with him when he left, we'd be with the Saviors, too, or some other group just like 'em." He said, and pointed at Tara. "But I'd have figured out who they were just like you did."
Tara just held her arm and nodded at Daryl. "Maybe that's what happened to Dwight."
I subconsciously nodded my head in agreement, because she did have a point, and after everything I was beginning to forgive him like she had.
"Is that before or after he killed your girl?" Daryl then asked, and I instantly glared at him for saying something rude to her. "Or is that all square now?"
Tara then stepped forward and didn't back down, and gave a single nod to Daryl. "It is. Look I might hate him forever, but he saved my life."
"No, he tried to kill you last night." Daryl said.
"Last night, I saw them, after Tara got shot." I said, sticking up for Dwight and Tara. "Simon held an axe over his head, and Dwight had the bow. If he wasn't the one to do it, then Tara would be dead right now."
Daryl just glared at me, but like Tara, I wasn't backing down either.
"Yeah, and when we were coming here, and running in those woods, I saw what he did. He was helping us." Tara said.
"Yeah." Daryl scoffed and looked back and forth between us. "I saw what I saw, too."
Daryl then stomped away and we were left there alone. I just sighed and looked at Tara, and she shrugged.
"He'll come around... eventually." I said, and watched Daryl as he began helping moving the last of the bodies.
"Even if he doesn't, that's not my problem.. shouldn't be yours either... We found it." Tara said and looked at me.
I looked back at her and nodded, and a small smile appeared on my face. She's right, we found it... our humanity.

~~~~~~~~~~

The day went by quickly, and everyone was sleeping by the time the sun went down. The lobby of the building on the first floor became everyone's bed, and Maggie gave our group a room to share for the night. The nursery was the room right across from us, so I was able to hear when a baby started crying.
I groaned and covered my eyes, and then rubbed them open. Daryl was laying next to me, and I gently patted him.
"I got it." I whispered.
Daryl mumbled and nodded that he heard me, and then rolled over to continue sleeping. The baby's cries were getting louder, so I quickly stood up and snuck out of the room, and went into the nursery. Nobody else in the room was awake, so I quietly snuck through over to the crib. I saw it was Lee who was crying and he was waving his arms around and fussing.
"Oh, shhh, shhh." I cooed and gently picked him up. "What's wrong? You hungry baby? Is that it?" I whispered and quietly sat us down in the rocking chair. I pulled my shirt to the side and tried to feed him, which he only did for ten minutes, before he started hitting my chest and getting fussy again.
"Oh no." I whispered and stood up.
I grabbed his little hands to keep from hitting me and stood up from the chair. I rocked him as I walked to the door, and was thinking maybe he just needed a walk and some fresh air.
I walked passed people sleeping in the hallway, and carefully walked down the stairs. It was dark inside, but I managed to see that the front door was open, and I titled my head in confusion because it shouldn't be open.
I reached the bottom of the stairs on the first floor, and Lee let out another cry. I just didn't understand why he was so upset. I bounced him again and looked down at him, and tried to calm him down.
"Lee, what's wrong baby?" I asked.
He just closed his eyes and cried, and then I heard something move in front of me. Then a shadow blocked out what little light was around and I looked up, and gasped in shock.
It was Pete, and he was turned. He lunged forwards and I instantly brought up my prosthetic, and the walker bit down on the metal. I grunted and tried to push him off, but he was a tall and heavy man before he died. I still had Lee crying in my arms, and that raised the attention of other people laying down who had also turned in their sleep.
"H-Help!" I managed to yell as I struggled to push Pete back. "Walkers!!"
Pete fell on top of me, and his weight pushed me backwards and I fell onto the stairs. Several walkers were now up and coming for me. I kicked the walker in the face, and blood rushed down, and I kept kicking harder. Lee was screaming in my arms, and I tried to protect him by pressing him against my chest.
"Kell." I heard a voice mumble from upstairs, then it shouted out loud. "Kell!" Daryl yelled.
"Daryl!" I yelled back, fear in my voice.
Screams then came from a lady on the first floor, and then everyone was awake. Daryl was the first to get to me, and he stabbed Pete in the head, leaving his knife stuck in his skull, and then instantly pulled me backwards. More walkers walked over Pete's dead body and reached for us, and Lee who was acting like their dinner bell. Daryl swiftly pulled me up the stairs and stood me up, then pushed me down the hallway back to the nursery. I was holding Lee tight in my arms, and kept looking behind me. I saw that we started fighting back, but I knew that we were going to lose a lot of people tonight.
"Kell, go." Daryl shouted over the growls and yells, and kept ushering me forwards.
We got to the nursery and he pushed open the door and I ran inside. I turned around and he looked at me and held up his finger.
"Stay here." He ordered, his voice low and serious.
I just nodded and he closed the door in front of me, and i just stood there. Rosita was in the same room, along with Tara, Enid, and a few others and they all started bombarding me with questions.
"Pete turned, attacked everyone downstairs... it's a massacre." Was all I could say, and everyone just stared at me.
Rosita pulled out her gun and said she'd keep watch on the door, and everyone decided to stay in here. We started to hear gunshots going off from outside, and some of the women flinched at the noise.
I was still a little dazed from what happened, and stumbled into a chair to sit down. Lee was still crying and I held him in my arm and patted his bottom, but he just wouldn't stop. I then dropped my head and rested it on his, closed my eyes, and rocked my body back and forth. Not only was I trying my best to calm him down, but I was trying to calm myself down. I whispered and spoke to us under my breath, and I kept my eyes closed, just waiting for the crying and screams to stop.

~~~~~~~~~~

Awhile later, the door to the room opened, and Rosita and Enid aimed their guns. It was just Rick and Daryl, and they lowered their guns. I was still in shock and was rocking myself back and forth in the chair, whispering under my breath, and isolated in a corner. Every time I open my eyes, I'd see Lee, and then I'd think I almost just lost him, too.
"Good out there?" Rosita asked.
"House is clear." Rick said.
They walked into the room and Daryl shut the door behind them.
"How'd this happen?" Tara asked.
It was quiet until Daryl cleared him throat. "Umm, the Saviors did something to their weapons. Everyone they cut up, who got shot... they all got sick." He said. "Some of them turned."
"What?" Enid said, not believing what we were hearing. "
"They still have us working for them then. Killing our own." Rosita said, and I could tell she was pissed.
"No..?" Enid said, and they all looked at Tara, who got shot last night.
"Okay..." Tara then said, accepting the fact that she might be infected too.
"When we were out there, and you said you were done waiting, I could've killed him. I should've." Daryl told Tara.
"No." She said. "He wanted to be here with us. And no matter what he did or how he tried, I wanted him dead. I just couldn't let it be anything else... Karma's a bitch, right?" She quietly scoffed, and then everything was quiet.
At this point, Lee was done crying and asleep in my arms, but I was still rocking myself in the chair to calm down. I heard footsteps approaching me, and then Daryl knelt down in front of me. He tucked my hair behind my ear and gently lifted up my chin. My eyes were still closed and I was still whispering to myself to calm down.
"Kell..." Daryl said, but I shook my head. "Kelley."
I squeezed my eyes shut and a single tear rolled down my cheek, and then I finally opened my eyes. Daryl was staring at me, and I stared back. I stopped talking to myself and slowly stopped moving my body.
"Kelley, it's okay now." He said.
"No." I whispered and shook my head. "It's barely been three days since Carl died, and now, Lee almost died too... because of me.. it's all my fault." I said, and more tears streamed down my cheeks. "This is all my fault... he's dead because of me, they'll be dead because of me, it's me.. it's me.. it's my fault..."
Daryl just shook his head and leaned forwards, taking Lee out of my arms. He put him back in his crib, and then walked back over to me. My hands were shaking, but Daryl grabbed them and it stopped. He lifted me up and wrapped his arms around me. My arms remained at my sides, but Daryl just squeezed me tight and held me. His embrace was strong and it made me feel protected, and I felt myself calming down by the second. I just rested my forehead against his chest and bowed my head. I felt defeated, but something in me was still refusing to give up. I knew, that this feeling would pass, that things would get better, but tonight, just didn't feel worth it.