A Survivor's Diary of the Apocalypse (TWD/Daryl Dixon)

S3Pt7 - Baby And Bruises

Maggie cut open Lori on her old c-section scar. "I'm sorry." Maggie cried and kept cutting her.
Lori couldn't stop screaming.
"Stop it!" Carl cried. "You're killing her."
Lori kept screaming until she passed out from exhaustion and blood loss. I grabbed Carl and hugged him and he hid his face in my chest. Maggie reached into her stomach and grabbed the baby. She cut the umbilical cord but the baby wasn't breathing. We stared at her, but she didn't move because she was in shock. I grabbed the baby from her and held it. I rubbed its chest and patted its back, and luckily the baby started crying. Carl took off his jacket, gave it to me, and I wrapped it around the baby.
"Carl. You have a baby sister." I whispered and looked at the baby.
"We need to go." Maggie said and stood up.
I saw she was trying to keep her composure, but also knew she was scared.
"Not yet." I said and looked at Lori's body.
"We can't just leave her. She'll turn." Carl said.
Maggie started to cry. I looked at Carl then at my gun. I was about to grab it when Carl shook his head.
"I have to do it. She's my mom." He told me.
He pulled out his own gun and sat down by his mom. He bowed his head and Maggie and I gave him some space. We walked back towards the door and Maggie checked the hallways.
"We're clear." She whispered.
"He needs a minute." I said, referencing Carl.
She wiped her tears and looked at the baby. I felt the baby's cheeks and she opened her eyes and looked at me.
"Treat them like your own..." I heard Lori's voice in my head.
I felt connected to this baby now, like she was my own, and I wasn't going to let anything happen to her.
I snapped out of my thoughts when we heard the gunshot and Carl walked over to us. He didn't say a word, walked right past us, and left. We followed him back to the cellblock which was now empty. We then walked outside. Maggie went out first, then me and Carl walking side by side. All the walkers were dead and the group was staring at us. The baby started crying and Rick looked at me, then at Carl who was still holding his gun. Maggie couldn't speak and ran over to Glenn. My face was red from crying and I looked at Rick. He knelt on the ground in front of Carl.
"No..." Rick cried. "No!!"
"I'm so sorry." I cried.
He stared at Carl and then stared at his newborn daughter. He finally realized what happened and that Carl had to kill his mother. He started crying and fell to the ground and curled up in a ball. Rick was heartbroken.
"I-I- We couldn't-" I cried, unable to speak.
Carl stood there and silently cried. I walked over to Daryl and he looked at me and the baby in my arms. I started sobbing and he grabbed me and hugged me.
"I'm sorry Kelley." He whispered.
He grabbed my head and pulled me into his embrace. I cried in his chest and held onto the baby tight. He rubbed my back and let me cry. Everyone was silent and sad. Rick had his hands covering his face until he lowered them. He slowly stood up and we all stared at him. Rick ran for an axe and then ran into the cellblock, ready to kill anything and everything.
"Rick!" I called out to him but he didn't care.
I looked around then at the baby in my arms. I quickly ran over to Carl.
"I need you to hold her." I said. "I need to go after him."
"Well, I can go." Glenn butt in.
"No." I raised my voice, then calmed down. "Lori told me to look after him." I then looked at Carl. "Please take your sister."
He looked at me and nodded. I handed him his sister and looked at Daryl. He looked concerned but I looked back at the cellblock.
"Babe, I have to." I said.
Daryl hesitantly nodded and hugged me.
"Let me see that baby." Hershel said.
Before I left, I walked over with Carl. Hershel started assessing the baby and she started crying.
"She healthy. But she needs formula, fast. Or she won't survive." He said.
"No. Not her. I'll go on a run, see if any stores have anything." Daryl said and walked over to his bike.
"I'm going with you." Maggie said.
Daryl waved at her to come on and they got on his bike. I ran up to Daryl and hugged him.
"Be safe Dixon." I told him.
He nodded and held my cheek. "Always."
He pulled me in for a kiss and we kissed. I watched him leave and sighed. I turned around and ran into the cellblock to find Rick. Inside I didn't see him, but I saw the gate to the tombs open. I cautiously walked through the hallways and saw blood and dead walkers every few feet. I followed the trail and it led me to Rick who was staring at the wall with his back turned towards me. He had dead walkers all around him, their faces deformed from his axe.
"Rick." I said cautiously.
I walked up to his slowly, not knowing how he'd react to me.
"We're all worried about you. You shouldn't be in here." I said. "Come back with me."
Rick slowly turned around and looked at me. His face was covered in blood and he didn't look like himself. I looked at the ax that was still in his hand, then at him, and walked a little closer.
"Rick, you don't have to go through this alone." I said.
I was now standing face to face with him and lightly put my hand on his shoulder. He flipped out when I touched him and his body tensed. He raised his hand and slapped me across the face. I held my cheek and looked back at him, but my eye contact made him even angrier. He grabbed my neck with his hand, pushed me back, and lifted me up against the wall. He was choking me and I couldn't breathe. I struggled and hit his arm until he let go. He grabbed me and threw me to the ground. I took a deep breath and grabbed my throat, and could instantly feel the bruises forming, and my cheek was hot. I felt lightheaded and my vision was a little blurry. He stared at me menacingly but didn't move.
"Rick." I wheezed. "Lori wanted me to tell you something."
I stood up and leaned against the wall for support. I breathed in deeply and looked at Rick.
"She wanted to let you know she loves you... She loved you very much." I said.
Rick was breathing heavy and I saw he was exhausted, but still not sane. I wasn't giving on up Rick so I tried to touch him again. I put my hand on his chest to keep his steady. He grunted, grabbed my arm, and pushed me away. He grabbed his axe he dropped on the floor and walked away from me and deeper into the tombs. I sighed and decided to head back to the cellblock. There was nothing else I could do for Rick, and clearly he didn't want me around.
Once back at the cells, I saw Hershel and Beth sitting at a table. Carl was standing up and holding his baby sister. I walked in and sat down at the table. They stared at me, and I guess it was obvious what happened.
"What happened to your..." Beth asked and motioned to my face and neck.
Hershel tried to stand up on his crutches but I lightly pushed him down.
"I'm fine. I made a mistake of touching him when he's unstable." I said, trying not to worry them.
It still hurt to breathe and I held my throat.
"What did he do?" Carl asked, and I sighed. "I want to know." He said.
I looked at Carl and put my hand on his shoulder. "He hit me, held me up against the wall and choked me." I said. "But he didn't mean it. I know it."
"I'm sorry." He sighed.
"Hey, Carl. It's not your fault." I knelt down in front of him, and lifted his chin. "It's not your fault."
Carl nodded and I hugged him.
"Daryl's going to be upset." Hershel said.
"I know. Trust me, I do." I sighed.
The baby started crying when she saw me and I took her from Carl. I rocked her in my arms and she quieted down.
We sat there for awhile, waiting for Rick or Daryl and Maggie to return. I looked down at the baby in my arms and she looked so peaceful. I kissed her forehead and she stretched in my arms.
"She's so precious." I whispered.
They nodded in agreement and smiled at me. Then the doors to the cellblock opened and Daryl and Maggie were back.
"Beth." Maggie said and ushered to over.
They started making a bottle and Daryl walked over to me and the baby. I kept my head down to avoid letting him see my neck and face. Daryl held out his hands and I handed him the baby.
"How she doing?" He asked.
Maggie brought over a bottle and Daryl took it, and he started feeding her. She drank automatically and we all sighed with relief.
"She got a name yet?" He asked Carl.
"Not yet... I was thinking maybe Sophia.. or Andrea, Amy, Patricia... Lori." Carl said quietly.
I put my hand on Carl's shoulder and he sighed. Daryl looked back at the baby and smiled.
"Huh, you like that? You like that little asskicker?" Daryl joked.
His comment lightened the mood and we laughed. Daryl even laughed and looked up at me, but his laughter grew still.
"Shit." I thought and lowered my head.
Daryl handed the baby to Carl and stared at me. I lightly lifted up my face and looked at my cheek and the bruises on my neck.
"What happened?" Daryl asked through gritted teeth, trying to keep his anger under control.
"Rick.. He hit me and choked me." I said. "No big deal." I shrugged.
"No big deal?!" Daryl yelled at me.
Everyone stared at us. Daryl grabbed my hand hard and led me away to our cell. Once in our cell, he stopped and turned me around.
"Now, what the hell do you mean 'no big deal'?" Daryl yelled.
I glared at him and rubbed my hand which started aching from his grip. He sighed and wiped his face with his hands. This time Daryl calmly grabbed my hand and sat us down on the bed.
"Tell me what happened." He said.
I sighed and told him. "I ended up finding Rick, but he wasn't sane. I made the mistake of touching him, and that's when he slapped me. He held me against the wall and choked me." I slowly explained to him.
Daryl looked at me, and he was bouncing his leg anxiously. I put my hand on his knee and he stopped.
"It was an accident. He didn't mean it." I tried to convince him. "I'm fine."
Daryl looked at me and I saw anger in his eyes still. He looked at the bruises on my neck and softly touched them. I moved his hand away and laid down in the bed. I closed my eyes to relax, but felt his eyes on me.
"I'm going to relax Dixon. So either join me or leave." I sighed.
Daryl sighed and laid down next to me. He threw his arm over me waist and spooned me. He kissed the back of my head and rested his head against my back. I could feel the tenseness in his body, and knew he wasn't to forget about this anytime soon.
"Ugh. I really should've not bothered Rick today."