Is Forever Enough?

Chapter 96

Derek wasn't sure what woke him, but as his groggy eyes scanned the room, he noticed his surroundings were covered in darkness. The sun had set...some time ago, from what it looked like. It had been almost lunch time when he had fallen asleep. Could he have possibly been asleep all that time?

Sitting up in bed and rubbing his eyes, he noticed Meredith was no longer sound asleep beside him. Glancing towards the clock on his bedside table, he let out a gasp as the numbers glowed back at him. It was almost 7:30...he had literally slept all day.

Kicking off the blankets in a hurry, he launched himself out of his bed and then had to brace himself against the bedside table so he wouldn't fall over. Standing up fast was not a good idea.

Giving himself a few seconds to regain his barrings, it allowed the fog from his mind to clear. The first thing Derek noticed, was that his head no longer hurt. He was relieved that the pounding ache had disappeared. Testing out his muscles, he stretched his arms above his head. His body didn't ache either...that was another plus.

His stomach rumbled in hunger, reminding him that Addison's bagel had been the only food he had eaten all day. He didn't know where Meredith or his daughters were. He felt bad, suddenly realizing she had most likely sacrificed her own sleep to let him get more rest.

Walking down the hall and peering into each room, he found that the upstairs was empty. Giggles and chatter could be heart floating up through the foyer and he sighed hearing Addison's and Mark's voices. He hadn't expected them to stay that long, it was more than he had ever assumed they would do. But, a part of him was glad they did, at least Meredith hadn't been left to care for all three girls alone.

"You really should have woken me." Derek said as he walked down the steps and into the living room. "I had no intentions of sleeping all day." All eyes turned to face him at once. Scanning the room, Derek was surprised to find Meredith, Ava and Mark on the floor surrounding some sort of board game. Addison was on the sofa cuddling a sleeping Peyton, and his twin babies were lying beside Meredith on a blanket.

"Then how could we have talked behind your back all day?" Teased Mark, and a minute later, the trio on the floor turned back to their game. The scene wasn't chaotic in anyway. In fact, it was almost peaceful.

Running a hand through his messy hair, he sat down beside Addison. "Seriously, you shouldn't have let me sleep all day. I feel bad."

"Addison wouldn't let me wake you." Responded Meredith from the floor. It was the first thing she had said to him. He caught her gaze for a second, he worried that she was mad at him, but her face turned into a smile, and she turned back towards the game. Realizing she was fully focused on whatever they were playing, he watched them curiously.

"You needed the sleep." Addison told him, she would have said more, but a loud buzzer sounded through the room causing Mark to let out a groan.

Throwing his hands in the air, Mark yelled, "How is that possible? I killed the guy? This thing is broken."

"I guess plastic surgeons don't have steady hands after all." Meredith told him with a smirk and her eyes twinkled in triumph. "Hand it over, Sloan, let me show you how it's done." Derek watched in complete confusion. Looking over to Addison, she just shrugged.

"Don't kill him, mommy! He's a good boy." Ava bossed.

"I won't, I'm good at this." Meredith replied in a serious tone. Arching his brow, Derek leaned his hands against his knees and watched in fascination as Meredith maneuvered the tiny metal tweezers into the cardboard man's body. Mark and Ava were watching her as if she was performing surgery, and he couldn't believe how involved in the game they were.

"You did it, mommy! Good job!" Ava cheered. No buzzers were going off, and Ava knew that was a good thing.

"What are they playing?" Derek whispered towards Addison. He didn't want to disturb the game, but he really couldn't believe Mark and Meredith were enjoying it so much.

"Operation. They've been playing all afternoon." She told him with an amused grin. "I think they like it more than Ava."

"It's an intense game, Addie!" Mark cut in, without looking over at her. He was too busy glaring at Meredith who had just successfully pulled a wishbone out of her fake patient.

"I've won three times now...." She bragged, completely ignoring his glare.

"That's a fluke. It's not even fair, your hands are smaller."

"You just can't handle loosing. Poor Mark Sloan."

"That's not nice, mommy..." Ava told her mother with a finger in the air.

"Yeah, Meredith, that wasn't nice." Mark teased. Derek sat watching in complete shock. He had never seen his best friend so into a kid's toy...and it had been an equally long time since he had seen Meredith on the floor playing as well.

Both babies were fast asleep at her side, and every so often Meredith would touch one of their tiny feet with her hand. It amazed Derek, that she could manage it all so effortlessly. "Is this even our game? I've never seen it before..." His attention was still focused on Meredith, but the question had been directed at Addison.

For the first time, Meredith took her concentration completely off the game and turned to face him. The question had caught her off guard, he could tell by the panicked look on her face. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Addison sending Meredith a concerned frown. He didn't understand what was going on.

Opening her mouth, Meredith tried to avoid his gaze as she spoke. "Oh....we...gave it to her..." Tiny wrinkles formed around Derek's eyes as he stared at her in confusion. He had no memory of purchasing the gift. He thought for sure he would remember a game called 'Operation'.

"Was I there?" It was an innocent question, he really didn't know, but the tiny sliver of hurt he saw cross Meredith's features made him regret asking at all.

Shaking her head yes, she wanted so badly to look anywhere but at him, but his eyes were pleading with her not to. "Yes, we picked it out together....for her birthday." His face fell all at once, as the memory suddenly clicked into place. It was a fuzzy one....one that easily slipped away with time. "I let her open it the morning of her party....it was her favorite gift..." She trailed off, her voice so soft it was almost hard to hear.

Derek's eyes were full of guilt as they stared first at Meredith, and then at Ava, who was oblivious to the situation happening around her. The room had grown silent, both Addison and Mark tried not to make the the room any more awkward than it already was.

It was hard for Meredith to see Derek so hurt. She hadn't meant for it to happen, but there was nothing she could do about it either. His absence from their family seemed like a distant memory. They had grown, and changed, and thrived....but the memories still remained, and until Derek managed to forgive himself....the memories would always hurt.

Derek hadn't said anything, and after several uncomfortably silent minutes he finally replied, "Oh...I..."

"Derek, it's alright." Meredith replied, hoping to shake off the tension that surrounded them. "She got so many gifts...it's easy to forget one..." It wasn't true, Derek knew it and he furrowed his brows in self loathing.

"I have nothing to remember because I wasn't there. I didn't see her open any presents." His voice was laced with anger, but it was towards himself, and Meredith hated to see him like that.

Standing up, he ignored the fact that all eyes were once again on him. "I'm starving, I need to get something to eat." He said, needing an excuse to leave the room.

"We ordered take out while you were sleeping. There is some in the fridge for you..." Addison chimed in, hoping to help. Derek just nodded in response.

"Don't worry, Shep." Mark said. "Sometimes I forget what day Peyton was even born..." Sighing, Derek left the room without responding. The eerie silence was still there, even as Mark's words hung in the air.

"You forget her birthday?" Addison accused, glaring down at Mark.

"Just once or twice....I have a lot of birthdays to remember..." He defended halfheartedly. He knew there was no way to get out of the hole he had dug for himself so he shut his mouth abruptly.

Meredith hadn't said a word, and was still watching the spot on the sofa that Derek had previously occupied. Noticing it, Addison frowned. "I should go talk to him right?" Meredith mumbled. "If he sits in there brooding all alone, it'll be bad...." She wasn't sure why she had to talk herself into it, but Addison nodded in agreement, and it was all Meredith needed before she got up. "Do you mind....?" Glancing towards the babies her words trailed off into nothing.

"Of course not." Addison assured, knowing what she meant.