Running in the dark

Chapter 21

"Remus, open the door," James said knocking on the door once again.

"Where's Sirius?" Mary asked after giving the door a pound herself.

"Detention with Slughorn," James mumbled resting his head against the bathroom door.

Peter ran back up the dorm stairs with Regulus behind him. "Slughorn wouldn't let him out of detention," he mumbled.

"You tried alohorma," Regulus asked.

"He just locks it again," Mary replied.

Mary, Peter, James, and Regulus stood by the bathroom door it was close to dinner time and Remus hadn't said a word and hadn't opened the door once.

Regulus walked to the door and gave it a small knock "Remus, it's me, you gonna open the door?" he asked there was a small click and Regulus was surprised to see the door open a bit.

Remus stood by the door, his head down, he looked pale, almost sick. "Can I come in?" He asked and Remus nodded.

"You guys go to dinner, Sirius will probably show up there," Regulus told them before slipping into the bathroom and Remus locked the door once again.

At least three packets of cigarettes had been used, the buds now lying discarded around the bathroom, it stank of them and Regulus held back the instinct to cough.

Remus stood by the door, his fingernails were bloody and his fingertips looked burnt, probably from the cigarettes. His forehead was bleeding slightly so Regulus realized Remus had dug his fingernails into his head.

"Don't pity me," Remus spoke, his head down.

"I won't pity you, but I'm going to fear for you," Regulus replied.

"I've got to get better, I have to, I will but I keep messing up," Remus said.

"You're not messing up Remus, you could never mess up," Regulus replied. He wasn't good with feelings, and that's what Remus wanted.

The others would pity him, tell him to cry it out, but he couldn't right now, he could watch the world burn in front of his eyes and not blink an eye, just wait, and watch.

"Hey, that detention was bloody long," Sirius said sitting down beside James at the table and grabbing a spoonful of mashed potatoes, and putting it on his plate.

"Where's Remus and Reg?" Sirius asked looking at their group of friends.

"Regulus is talking with Remus, he locked himself in the bathroom," Peter told him.

"What?" Sirius spoke. Remus was getting better, he had been so much better than before and now this. It was killing him to not be able to keep Remus happy.

Regulus made Remus wash his hands and he began to walk around the bathroom cleaning it up. He then opened the door and brought Remus into the dorm room.

"You're going to be ok Remus," Regulus said sitting on the edge of Remus's bed beside him.

"If we're thirty and both single Reg, let's marry alright," Remus joked laying his head on Regulus' shoulder

"Yeah, when you realize who's the better black brother and Potter drives me insane," Regulus chuckled.

When Sirius walked into the room it was quarter to nine, Regulus had just walked down the dorm stairs and Sirius shot straight up. Remus was sleeping in bed, and Sirius just stopped, huffing for air. Remus was ok, he was sleeping, and he was out of the bathroom he would be ok.

By eleven Remus had awoken again. He could hear soft snores around the room. He smelt like cigarettes, and stunk of them, he knew he'd smoked way too many in the bathroom, he could practically feel his lungs burning. He went to the bathroom again, it was all clean now and he showered, washing the smell away.

He walked out of the bathroom with just a towel around his waist, putting the clothes he had worn into a pile. "Moony..." Sirius's voice called, it sounded groggy.

"Shit, sorry pads, go back to sleep," Remus said he practically ran to the bathroom to switch the light off and let the room return to the darkness it once was. But Sirius was already up, he walked over to Remus and wrapped his arms around his bare chest, hugging him close, not caring that he was getting wet himself.

"You're getting wet," Remus said to him.

"I don't care," Sirius mumbled, definitely still tired.

"You can at least let go of me so I can get dressed," Remus said and Sirius reluctantly let go.

Sirius was of course shirtless with red pajama bottoms on. Remus put on blue pajama bottoms and a white sweatshirt.

"Pads," Remus said turning back around after pulling his shirt on.

"Yeah?" Sirius responded, letting out a yawn, he was still so tired but would stand here as long as Remus would.

"You wanna go to bed," Remus chuckled. His laugh was genuine but Sirius could see he looked in pain.

"Alright," he nodded, and then he took Remus's hand and pulled him onto his bed.

Remus lay down beside Sirius, looping an arm around his waist. "Thank you," he whispered.

"I haven't done anything," Sirius grumbled back.

"You've done everything," Remus snapped back and he kissed the side of Sirius' neck. That made Sirius realize, that they had not kissed since before Christmas, it just hadn't been something that seemed appropriate.

"Then you owe me, I'm gonna need a good snog sometime soon," he murmured and he could almost feel the grin on Remus' face burning into his head.

"I'll get it to you, don't you worry, but thank you, thank you," he replied and Sirius took his hand in his and soon fell asleep.

"You will?" Mary beamed almost gasping.

"Of course, of course, yes a thousand yesses" Lily smiled back.

"Lily Evans my girlfriend," Mary chuckled to herself.

"Hold up what-" Marlene said walking into the common room, she looked very tired. "Is anyone here straight at this point, why are we all gay in the most homophobic time..." She muttered to herself and being too tired to gay to care she walked back upstairs.