SKZ - oneshots (completed)

Jeongsung

⌦ 𝐽𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑠𝑢𝑛𝑔
⌦ 𝑡𝑤𝑠: 𝑠𝑢𝑖𝑐𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑚𝑝𝑡, 𝑠𝑢𝑖𝑐𝑖𝑑𝑎𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ𝑡𝑠
⌦ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑠: 824

***

The door slams opens so hard it sounds like it's being ripped off its hinges. The harsh breathes and heavy footsteps.

No, no, no, no-

"Innie!"

NO!

My Fucking God! Why can't I be never alone when I need it? Why the fuck I'm being left all on my own when I need someome? When I need that someone, everyone disappears? It's not fair. Fuck-

"Innie, please!"

Just leave me alone, God damn it! Why is he so-

"Please... Innie..."

... so caring and kind? So ethereal and endearing and so-

"We can talk about it all... I'll listen to you"

Fuck, if he keeps talking like that, I might as well just step away and back off. Why does he sound so scared? So upset? I can't have that... I don't think I could leave knowing he's sorrowful and unhappy. Afraid, alone.

"Can't you come to me? Please, just come here"

Fuck...

Jeongin opens his eyes which were tightly shut. His eyes focus on the scenery in front of him. Such a beautiful and aesthetically pleasing sight of a late evening of Seoul. Such a beauty holds so much evil, so much sadness, so much hidden things people know and are aware of but still barely see them. Hidden under the covers.

His heart hurts. His head hurts. His whole soul is aching, consumed, cracked. He wants out of this misery. He wants out of this pain. He wants- no, he needs-

"Innie?"

He wants to turn around, run into the arms of his one and only. His safe place. A place where he belongs to. A place where he fits. Perfectly.

He feels so lonely. So alone. So out of this world. Ao different from all the people. His voice, his words, his cries are never heard. He just wants to be heard for once.

Jeongin takes a deep breathe but it's harder than he thought it would. He sighs. Shoulders slumped, defeated, tired.

He slowly lets go of the scenery before him and his eyes land on the small figure a few feets away from him. The figure shakes, either because of the cold or the fear. Probably both. Jeongin wants to wrap around him, keep him safe, keep him warm. Just like that person does to Jeongin.

"Innie..."

The person says and holds his hand out, for Jeongin to take. Jeongin hesitates though. He doesn't know why. It's been so long. He's been imagining this day for so long. But his fantasies, dreams, have never gotten this far. This isn't a part of the plan. Jeongin isn't familiar with all this. In theory, everything is clear, lucid, easy. But in practise, it's all so hard, tough, energy draining.

As he meets the eyes of the person in front of him, he finds himself shattering, in an impasse. The eyes that look right into his, probably searching something, probably piercing his soul, are glistening with unshed tears. There's so much genuine emotion behind them. So much unsaid words. So much friendliness, geniality, compassion. It makes Jeongin faltering.

Jeongin fights the urge to jump forward, take the hand that's being offered to him and hold it tightly. He fights the urge to go back home with the person and hold him even tighter. He wants to go home, go to bed and fall asleep with the person he feels so much for, so he can wake up again and again to the familiar face, to those familiar eyes. They bring so much comfort, so much warmth and so much light to this cold and dark evening. To this cold and dark life.

Eventually, Jeongin finds himself taking a step forward. Jisung's eyes look more hopeful every second, the light becoming even brighter. It's just how Jisung is. Pulling people towards him because he's just that amazing.

Soon, Jeongin finds himself in the arms of his beloved. His love, his home, his everything. He buries his face into the other's shoulder, wraps his arms around the other's slim but strong body which is way shorter than him but that's fine.

Jisung sighs, revealed, grateful, happy. He closes his eyes and just relaxes. His other arm wraps around Jeongin's middle, holding him close, while the other wanders to Jeongin's hair, petting it, as if making the other sure that he's here and he's real.

Being in one another's embrace is so nice. An unbeatable feeling that wins the loneliness in every war, every time. Jeongin misses it. He doesn't want to let go. Maybe he never wanted to let go. Maybe he just wanted to be able to hold on better, try harder, find more joy in things and enjoy them genuinely.

Maybe he just wants it all to be okay again. Him and Jisung. Jisung and him. That's all he needs. Even as this lonely and melancholic evening turns to night and a new day begins.