Restoring The Blue Eyed Wolf.

Chapter 18.

Alpha Lucas's POV

Three months has done wonders for Ronan. Not everybody is on board with him getting to walk free, but they are slowly starting to come to terms with it. They welcomes him into the pack regardless of their own personal thoughts.

Ronan made a public apology to not only my pack, but to his as well. We combined our packs and are now one. Ronan is no longer an Alpha, he holds the power of a Gamma and is ok just sitting on the sidelines.

I had a lot to clean up around my pack once we all got back. There were people to take care of that had lost their families in the rogue attack led by Connor. They understand that Connor wasn't in his right mind, still isn't.

From what I hear, Amber and Connor have been making progress and she's been showing him how things are run. According to her, Connor really enjoys everything that comes with leadership and has taken to it quickly. He still isn't Alpha just yet, but I personally think he'd make a fantastic one once he's ready.

My pack house is currently full of people. Male female and children of all ages. Most adults have been widowed after losing their mates and a lot of the kids are left without parents. My pack house is their home now and will be until they are able to live on their own or someone takes them in. Until then, I am happy to have them here.

Ronan has been helping where he can. He's off of the main team that are currently building a nursing home for those who decide they don't want to live on their own anymore. The pack was ecstatic to hear about it and we have many who volunteered to help out, both human and wolf.

I have made myself a new schedule. Each morning my mate and I would wake up and get ready for the day, we then head downstairs into the kitchen and help the staff make breakfast for everyone in the pack house. We would set the table, console the ones who showed up upset, we even helped feed some of them because they were so depressed.

It's hard to see members of your pack suffering like this and knowing you're already doing everything you can to help. I just wish there was more I could do for them. I don't want to lose more pack members. We've lost about six due to them losing their mates. It tears me up inside knowing that I couldn't do anything to help them. I just have to focus on the positive of those who are still here and clearly fighting.

I did everything I could for those we lost and my mate reminds me of that all the time. She's right, there wasn't anything else I could have done and she told me she was proud of me regardless.

Today I've helped some of the more depressed members get out of bed and come downstairs to eat. They being a picture of their mate with them. My mate smiles at me from across the room. She's always been good with kids and is currently helping get them settled.

Ronan walks in then. He sees me helping an elderly woman down the steps and walks over to start helping me. I smile gratefully at him. She looks at him. " I forgive you... for whatever part you had in the tragedy that happened here. I know you didn't have much of a say so I'm it. " she says gently to him. Her voice breaking and her eyes shinning with tears threatening to be shed.

Many emotions fly across Ronan's face. He settles with a thankful look. " Thank you ma'am. " is his only response.

We get her to a table and place some food down in front of her. With tear stained cheeks, she begins to eat even though she doesn't look hungry.

We go to get the next person. We follow this pattern until everyone is downstairs. Ronan looks at me. " How do you do this every day without crumbling under the weight?" He asks.

" I push through. I have to. What kind of Alpha would I be to leave my pack suffering like this?" I say.

" I wish I could say I understand, but I don't. All I feel when I look at them I'm overwhelming guilt. " says Ronan.

" You may not have been a key part in what happened, but you also did nothing to prevent it and that's what these people are struggling with when they see you. I know you feel guilty and I don't disagree to what you feel, but things will get better in times. You're already doing a lot to help out and that's enough for now. I want you to know that I also forgive you. " I say.

He looks at me with tears in his eyes. " That means a lot to me. Thank you Alpha Lucas. " he says.

I smile. " Come, there's work to be done. You can help us with the clean up. " I say.

He nods. We help clean up and get those who want to go back to their room to their room. We lead some onto the porch and into rocking chairs where they can settle down with a good book. We also help the kids to a little area where they can quietly study for school while they're out for a while.

We help clean the tables and get things set for lunch in a few hours. The staff is grateful for our help. Finally I go upstairs to my office and sit down.

Upon realizing I finally have a moment to myself, I allow a heavy breath and a few tears from the stress. I try not to breakdown, my pack needs me to be strong, but after three months of this, it's all starting to weigh down on my heavily.

" I knew it. " says my mate.

My eyes snap up and I look at her. " You're taking the rest of today off. " she said.

I gape at her. " B-but what about..." she raises her hands and I quiet down.

" How are you going to help anyone if you don't help yourself first? " she says.

That felt like a slap to the face. She's completely right. She's had to take a few days off to decompress and I kept telling her I'm fine. That I could continue on, but I can't. I need to help myself first. I allow a few more tears to fall as I give her a sad smile.

" You're right as usual. Ok, I'll take today off. Just get me if something big happens, ok?" I ask.

She nods and hugs me. " Always. Now go lay down, read a book. Whatever it is you do to decompress. Cry if you need to. I'll come by and check on you in an hour. " she says.

" Yes ma'am. " I say with a genuine smile. She kisses me and then sends me on my way. She's right. She's always right. I need to help myself if I'm to help my pack and that's exactly what I'm going to do.

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A/N. Hey guys. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. It turned out different than I had originally planned. I hope it was enjoyable. The next chapter will be in Pamela's POV let me know who's you want to see after hers. Until then guys. Bye :-)